I'm dying,
can't you see my struggle?
I'm crying,
can't you see my tears?
I'm pretending,
can't you sense my differentness?
I'm alone,
can't you sense my need?
I'm drowning,
can't you hear my cries?
I'm screaming,
can't you hear my pleads?
I'm breaking,
can't you feel my pain?
I'm hurting,
can't you feel my suffereing?
Gone and running in an irreversible tension
And 10,000 miles left in question
Of ideas we just forget to mention
And the thoughts are left in the dark and disappear
and in comes walking, the unavoidable fear
A unknown direction, a road we somehow got sucked in to steer
Trying to take calm within the unpredictable shadows
Take control of your senses and dodge your arrows
and forget all of the anxiousness that somehow follows
A graveyard of dead trees
Fallen leaves of vast red and orange seas
Squirrels scurry before winter strikes
As children play while others pass on bikes
A harmony of the trees an the wind come together and sing
As a bird chirps then stops to clean it's wing
Children shrieking and screaming as they play
Angry armies of cars roar past, then fly away
Memories start of when I was a kid
Only broken away by time an what it did
Sitting still only in question
Of who I am and to what is my impression
I laughed . . . I played here
I was happy unknown of fear
But then reality again breaks memory's connection
Only to be lost again, still unknown of my reflection
I found a girl, and saw her perspective
Silent, yet surprisingly reflective
They claimed she was away, entirely defective
But I knew otherwise just from the look in her eyes
I saw through the silent, and closed off disguise
And from there, I saw the immediate connection
Completely dissected, but still searches for true affection
Her warm, yet crooked emotion
A calmed, yet broken devotion
Silent, but struggling for her sound
and yet, still not a face found
Her skin torn, gone and rotten.
Her mouth stolen, words lost, ignored and forgotten.
She was exposed to all of the morbid things
Corrupted lies, and uneven broken wings
All she wanted to know if happiness was true
This is what I saw, this was the girl I knew
And she left sudden, without a word,
Her existence she seen was too blurred
Before I could realize, she was gone and done
Did you ever wonder what life can become?
All she wanted to know if happiness was true
This is what I saw, this was the girl I knew..
I walk endless an road
locked into a heavy load
Of these questions and fears
Gripping from it's unreasonable tears
As a car roars by
I look dead into it's light
Wondering where it leads
But just like that it's gone
just like another day
As I wake up to the sun's harsh light
I try not to look back
As I attempt to fill this crack
Of this hurt and wonder
Unstoppable, a storm of rain and thunder
As a car roars by
I look dead into it's light
Wondering where it leads
But just like that it's gone
just like another night
As I stay up to the moon's hypnotic might
I feel like every single thing is like a mind game, played and laid out for me
I can't feel a single thing, like I'm not blind, but I still can't see
What is it really? Perhaps it's not that important?
Tell me what it is, or is it just my own comportment?
I have walked in the very things I've looked down upon
What I once thought was selfish, now I too am wrong
and now there is blood all over my hand
But I have no idea why, I just don't understand
This is a complication called the human mind
Irony, double standards, hypocrisy, A place to be so blind
To wallow and loop in this thick puddle of shame
For the mistakes commited, I fairly wore the blame
Knowing is the beginning is something I suppose
It's better to learn, rather than to find it to oppose.
So I guess I'll take my feelings and throw them to the floor
I'll leave you where you originally were, trapped inside a closed door
And you can echo your goodbyes
as you embrace yourself to the ink of sheer ignorance and sighs..
I have an unknown friend, who lives in the sky
Why I question him, I do not know why
I should not go to look for him, they say
But I know he'll want to look for me someday
I wonder, I ponder, even as I sleep
I dare not awake, for I have gone too deep
But again, the sun calls to another abrupt wake
Alone again, to find an answer for my sake
I take another step foward, for this I will fight
Forever wrapped in this question, how it echoes through the burning light
Bound by the cities
Bound by another one's pity's
Expect a place to be
Or expect not want to be seen
And I'll take you as walking money
I see you as a pretty big funny
We and I, all have found our place
And you my dear, have barely found a face
Bound to me, and to my briefcase
I'll lend you a smile, but you're a secret disgrace
Find the comfort in another's eyes
But in reality, another girl will have them hooked on their clever disguise
Find a place to be
Or expect not want to be seen
Stuck in a rut
With no qualities, not knowing what
Who are you and what are you in this city?
Gone and withdrawn, alone and all shitty?
Expect a place to see
Or expect us to be mean
For you are bound
What goes around, comes around
You are stuck here, forever with me
With no voice, or founding plea
For you are bound
My slave, to paint my sacred ground