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Is it the Mind …..Who

Tell’s the body.

Enough!

Or is it, just …

The body ….

Who

stops listening ……?

Giajl © Jim Love  

and then there are the days

that are no more than impossible

they feel like something the world wrote down for me

as an outline or a moral

I should treat them as experiments-

if I can write this word I’ve made my own day

if I can make this doorway I’m coming home

wrestling with my mind as if

it is the one that belongs to me

I can almost hear the laughter

silly little girl

she thinks she knows what she’s doing

she thinks she knows who she is

and that autonomy isn’t a rope

I will rip out of her hands

as the seconds slip by

and she realizes how wrong this is going

I still miss you as much as I miss who I could have been

I know there has to be a state of mind

somewhere,

like when I stop moving and my body

disconnects,

a place I can’t feel this

//

there are the days

I have a mind that is taken over by these arms this heart this monster of a skin

sex with you is deliberate

a pattern we pick out

and is it too much to ask

to not want to know you’ll want me tomorrow

so it can come as a surprise

so something strikes deep in my chest

when you walk this way

and I don’t have to call it regret

I don’t think I know the way to make someone want

and I keep losing the way with you

leaving pebbles and pepper and heartache every place I think I should kiss

letting my eyes wander and losing my center of balance

I leave already in lust with you

I have all of the burning but none of the rules

no compass for this world of body

//

I want to be someone’s bright and someone’s story

I reach out to every hand and dust slips through my fingers

I don’t think I know the way to separate my mind from what holds it

to carry myself the right way and still carry these thoughts

in what dark recesses of torture remain

exists a dreaded seed for us to obtain

to keep us sane and deliver us from evil

so goes the creed of an everlasting people

unending doubt resonates to be

impermanance rooted in an everlasting dream

scarcity of hope glimmering in dusk

prevention of fortune in a world of luck

forever told from stories past

eerily reminiscent of perpetual task

systems of new destroyed wisdom once known

for all apart of a world unsown

grimmace and malice plagued once more

in dire times that conjured vile scorn

but it was hope that was given once last chance

now grows a tree from the seed of our past

There in front of me

Standing

With no way around

It hits me

Waves of pain and devotion

It's an emotional ocean.

There's a sanctuary outside of my mind

But my mind had me confined

Inside of this rhyme

Running out of time

To find

This peace that I must've left behind.

Mind,

So complicated,

Yet so simple,

So mysterious I,

Find!

I was seated in a car,

but we weren’t driving.

Mysterious man with me,

Alhireth-Hotep; I suspect Thee.

Bags were on the road,

Babies popped out.

Yes, my mind is weird

but it makes me proud.

I stepped out of the car,

this I had to see!

But a black man with a gun,

was halting me.

I tried to ignore at best,

I had to take the babies

away from this evil man,

and I looked at the bag;

another popped out!

Traversing the worst terrain
the crust is veined and stained
by the binary brain system,
but I see some distant twisted vistas
colored by crystals,
covered by mystic thistles
with little meteor missiles 
hitting the moons above,
I was in love…
Sad that I 
had this iridescent
event of bliss broken
by the splatter of the Hatter’s 
Mercury Flurries 
upon grey matter,
now the circuitry is in disarray 
and I’m flattered by the way 
you hate me.

Tirelessly Training
maintaining my whole grain insanity,
my humanity,
I’m positive that the cause of it
is this Pearlescent Pear Wine,
it’s the definition of divine.
Please remedy, sit steady,
so ready to recline
and read some lines
to the fading
alien
sunshine.