I have the
diamonds sitting in
my lap and I
still will not stop looking for
the coal / when I sleep it
is his skin seeping
into the abyss/ when
you leave it is you in
my head but not on my
fingertips that slip
down down down / the open
door has you glancing and
I can feel myself
writing us out of
your story / there is
something out there I
am not ready to face
without fighting a lose-
lose situation / but this
one is not a question
of uncompromise it is
just me / me standing
hopes-deep in the
sand losing everything so
can you tell / can you
tell me which hinges
to push and pull so
I can have you
back again
The bones landed on the cards. The Fool.
The Sun.
The Chariot to bring them around
in front of me
so my heartbeat would even out
and my hands would stop rivaling
the dry leaves clinging to the sleepy oaks
at the edge of my yard.
They stand against the November wind
sweeping in to usher out October.
Here’s the thing about fortunes:
their fraying corners are soft against your fingers.
Millstones and mishaps all mess with my mind.
I have no idea of what I may find
Tomorrow, next week, or even next year;
Yet freedom is one thing that I hold dear.
Anchors and anvils are weighing me down;
They're keeping me here, in this one-horse town!
The call of the wild now cries out in vain;
I fear I may never leave here again!
Hitches and hurdles are lurking close by,
But that does not mean that I should not try
To loosen my shackles and lighten my load.
I dream of adventure, down a new road.
"Hope springs eternal" a poet once said.
Faith and good fortune are surely not dead!
I'll find the right moment, biding my time,
Then off I will fly, straight into my prime!
Copyright © Robert Haigh 2020
I remember the time,
When the world was much simpler,
As little kids we had it all setup for us,
Now see see the world in its true face now,
How it all changed with a few years going by,
I wish I still had the chances I had 5 years ago,
But now I take the chances today give,
Hoping I make the right call,
That I don't regret in 5 year,
Choices I can sit my kids down too,
Say this is what I've done,
Worring will I get disowned by my son,
Or hear Dad, that's so cool,
I want to be just like you,
But life is so fast how can I keep up,
It feels like I'm drowning someone,
I need help someone save me,
By the time I know my fate,
I will already know,
If I made it or if I'm a failure,
Did I let the river run,
Or did I take control,
And stear my own destiny,
To my own goals,
To my own end,
The day I smelled the gasoline forty feet up
I said
I don’t want to miss you like them
I don’t want to be the one
to push you to the wall
Sometimes all you need is a chance
and I speak a different language.
When you’re around
you know my stride is full of you
Maybe if I take half a step
we could change,
we’ll be afraid
of getting to where our hearts storm the drains.
I said
I don’t want to miss you like them
but if that’s what it takes
to live something worth seeing
to write something worth reading
to say something worth telling…
I will gladly take
the heartbreak on my hands.
You say that you’re scared of the unknown
Nobody can say what the future will hold
It’s terrifying going in blind
But I want you to know that you’re not alone.
I’ll be by your side
For as long as you’ll let me
And I’ll help clear the path
That you’re going to follow.
I’ll hold your hand
As we explore together
And when you’re ready
I’ll let someone else take the lead.
Nobody knows what will happen
Or who we will become
But I wouldn’t want to go through
The unknown with anyone else.
You and I are voices sight-reading tomorrow.
We write out to all the listeners
and give them no reason to stay
but there are so many hands on me
I can’t sit still for a second
even to listen to what might become the world.
I sight read your lips over and over and I keep finding a different rhythm
every step that sings I belong here
is interrupted when the seconds unwind
and lay out a carpet to carry me from you.
I just want to be the person I’m too shy to be
after a day or a universe
I walk in your door and drop everything I am on the ground
I know you won’t care.
Sometimes I think when I am in love
I am buried so deep in sanity that I don't know what it is anymore
I couldn’t recognize it if it came and broke down my door
made these breezes breathe through my skin
cleaned me out of brain space
gave me the best orgasm I have ever had.
And so I stare it straight in the face,
look right on through.
I reach in for all the love I can give you
I twist it with your smile
I let it go but it is easy
because there is so much to hold on to.
You pull at my lips like a few too many consonants,
a string of intrigue that will make me come back,
look twice.
This moment is glittering with promises
and I can’t catch it
no matter how fast it feels like I am flying.
I don’t think like my words
but my words build a body
that wonders if you can see
promise in girl
and then every time you get close
something wishes it away
because my doubt can’t stand the company.
The promises seep down
and I twist them in my fingers like red under thorns
and sometimes I look at you like I might go blind
or you’ll go missing.
Tonight is thunder and stillness and missing you
and someday it will be
a wave I can’t conquer by hearing your voice at night.
I think if history comes around again
I will repeat myself onto other lips
You are my first string and I will make the world our race.
I think if I fall in love again
I will see you in her eyes
I will make sure she is just enough like you
to break me down.