Darkness

Night And Day And Night

 

 

 

 

 

 

Night And Day And Night

 

Only the dark sky

can show a sheen like velvet

during the nighttime








Author's Notes/Comments: 

Ditto.

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Cry In My Sleep

 

 I Lost My Ability To Cry
I'm Hurting So Much
I Feel Hurt
I Feel Pain
I Want To Cry
But Theres Not Tears
Theres No Emotions
Hold Me Please


Because I Can't Feel My Arms
I Can't Feel My Legs Anymore
I Feel Like Crying
But I'm Dying In My Sleep
Waking Up With Dried Up Eyes
I Don't Remember Crying
I Don't Remember Sleeping
Chill Runs Through On My Skin


Crying Out In Pain
I Wish I Could Cry
For My Body Can't Take It Anymore
Is This What It Feels Like
Why Must I Feel So Cold
Why Must I Feel So Emotionless
Pieces Of My Heart
Tears In Pieces


I Wish Again
I Could Cry
Just Once More
If I Could Hold You
If I Could Hug You
And Tell You One More Thing
I Just Want To Cry
I Want To Cry On Your Shoulder

 

 

Buzzcut Boy

Folder: 
Confessions

It's not you,

It's not me,

It's not him

It's the world that has been

sucking us back in

to the dark void it's yet to fill

devouring our rainbows and

any shade and trace of light

and everything we hold dear

 

It's not you

It's not me

It might be

the words of a madman that

have devoured me piece by piece

ever since

until I suffocate and dissolve

into the nothingness I feel

at 3 a.m.

 

And I'm sorry if you knew this only now.

 

It's not you

It's not him

It's the constant fear

that has built a home

out of the shanties of my heart

Pulling the strings,

the triggers

on its whim

 

And I'm sorry but it's already won the war, I believe

 

It's not you

It's not me

It's not him

It's the inevitability I cannot escape

And so in silence, I shall

roam this world and carry

the memories of us,

your buzzcut and my smile,

and the glow I basked on with

in that April afternoon.

 

Forget about me.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

A poem about how depression affects love.

Solitary night

 
 
Solitary night
 
tears of dissatisfaction
 
choking on memories
 
a torrent as the dark presses in
 
Searching, seeking
 
the long-awaited slumber
 
of each miserable, useless regret of yesterday
 
Yet, afraid to face the uncertainty of tomorrow
 
 
 

It's getting harder...



It's getting harder to remember


what I was like


before I was damaged,


before you tore me open


and forced your darkness in.


I have tried to get it out


by opening my skin


but there is always more


left deep within.



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Sweet Silent Scream

Folder: 
Struggles

Enveloped in sheets, in silence,

The sheets stay still, 

But in the mind is the scream--

the visit from you that won't stop

 

I see you; you do not,

I scream, plead and cry,

And you go on and on, with your life,

 

All I want, all I need, is to be 

needed, and wanted

 

You cry, and I scream to let me

Soothe your pain, to let me 

help in any way, 

 

and you stare into the distance, 

while I'm in limbo stuck,

in this sickly state I stare:

 

I want to be released. To let go and yet

Somehow this is still a.

sweet, silent.

scream

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Somehow, nightmares just keep repeating. 

 

And yet somehow, we are sometimes most alive then. 

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Last Climb One Last Time

Folder: 
Struggles

Each moment, struggling to swim,

The sun is over; the light dims,

My hands grasp the jagged rocks,

Familiar feeling of faint fury--

 

stuck in a loop

 

stuck in a loop.

 

Rest as the waves lap,

look up and see 

the climb ahead 

again

Memory serves anguish

knowing each climb has been

slow and when it seems over

 

the tide comes roaring in

 

to claim its victim back

to its dark blue depths

 

the cold is setting in 

and I'll climb again

 

The climb, easy now,

The top, close,

Fingertips reaching and 

desperation, sets in 

 

Navy blue screaming to

Bring back its body

 

a smile sweeps across

as salty water erupts

 

At least I know this is 

 

the last climb. 

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On Nights, Such as This…

On Nights, Such as This…

By JFarrell

 

On nights, such as this…

 

The rain teems down in sheets

From a deep indigo sky

Laden with thick, heavy, ominous clouds

 

The lightening strikes down as serrated blades

Followed by, at first, a quiet, almost unnoticeable murmur

Which grows in depth and volume to become a deafening rumble

 

The only other sound

is the hypnotic sibilance of the rain

Droning out a tattoo

 

On nights, such as this…

 

Guy Fawkes and his conspirators plotted

ISIS contrive their next act of cowardice

The dark creatures feel stronger

 

Highywaymen held up coaches

Punks with knives rob the weak

And those that thrive in darkness feel braver

 

On nights, like this

Vermin are given more courage

To rob, rape, kill…..  

anything a coward thinks will make him a man

 

Because, the day shows the shameful, pathetic excuse for the man he really is

 

Author's Notes/Comments: 

yep, raining here :)

One

Verse 1:
Every breath you take,

I watch you slip

Further away into death.

Are you still measuring

The tears you've shed?

 

Chorus:
Maybe, you wake up

Drenched in sweat.

Is your conscience

Crawling on the floor?

Are you okay?
'Cause I understand.

 

Verse 2:
'Cause time ticks away

At every breath you take.

No one knows your story

Or why you're here.

You'd keep walking without

A road or a choice back.

 

Bridge:
You are the one.

When I was wandering

Between life and death,

You held out your hands for me.

 

Last-Chorus:
Do you have scars?

Do you have wounds?

Are you counting the breaths you take?

You are the one.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Inspired by the Korean Hip-Hop song: "One" by Epik High.