you can tell a lot about a person
by how they choose to die.
I have taught myself everything I know.
windowpanes,
steering wheels,
love knots.
things that will leave less mess and more empty.
it is what I do when the curve hits
almost go off the edge screaming.
if I fill myself up with it
that empty
will I get heavier or lighter?
sometimes nothing feels like a weight I can’t carry
laced with truths I don’t recognize
because they hide in all the dark corners.
my head is a game of hide and seek
and I trip over the upturned furniture
when I least expect it.
each minute is a sugar kiss
until I breathe and it tastes like salt.
but there are a lot of places
I haven’t found yet-
soil to fill the holes,
soul to fill the spaces.
places I will scratch into my skin
until they are so much a part of me
you can almost forget they are there.
people I will wrap myself in,
soft whispers in chocolate,
jagged edges in seawater,
dynamite in cages,
so I can’t let go.
you can tell a lot about a person
by how they choose to live.
Here silent time have kept not a day dense
But flowers track the sun and swallow light,
In, till the earth green gloat tear out fragrance
Of grass, it rich, nature thing and posing tree
Closer, the branches fall and pull back from me
In into shapes of it that a shadow can trace;
A drooping free leaflet bunch, a garden's face.
This life in motion has me the diamond- rock
And Glass of time I've yet to see in my walk!
And haters seen, a few, a lot but unknown
Of who may be behind the deeds of my own.
Clasp me the hand of God, and the hands of fans
Till giants clip and play the songs I began
With Lyre strings awoken from death to ear.
The mortals have to learn
Of their home and man-
Kind who revolving laps
Of life all on a map
Of fate we travel in
Steps forth, we are going
Together not astray
Pretoria, day to day.
Life is rot'ry, a wheel
Goes up and down, it be,
Winning and victors fortunes,
Loss and victim misfortunes.
But the time is fair-
Ly distributing a share.
Dusk to dawn, and tomorrow
Long shade and shadow follows.
My life and yours both are together
And days, more or less, shall take us further
Through, as when wind find out a way
Among the dense past, future long always
Is where within our lives revolve the better
And worse seen life all the way it is,
Now and forever more.
Forgiving goes but forgetting holds
The brain whose sleep it cannot remember
But heartbeats hit upon one other strongly
Till soft can feel your Human sympathy,
The love which healing you cannot deny;
Warm-blood living, whoever is, still cries,
Now and forever more.
From my knotty pine writing table
Where I always feel strong and able
I have built a world on typing paper
Where I rule mighty as any dictator
I’ve made a comfortable place of it
For all the pages make a very nice fit
Just the right size for each emotion
And now my life has less commotion
I have company hanging on every wall
People young old short fat and tall
Some funny some in love some whine
All are the brush strokes of my mind
I create interesting conversations
And fabricate all sorts of relations
Everyone does exactly as I deem -
Acting out my every written scene
I know each and every person by name
Know addresses and where they remain
I hear every breath - each spoken line
Without me they’ve no voice or design
I have built a world where I am safe
Where I’m boss so can be early or late
Look out the window - see what I want
Or just hang out - and be nonchalant
I’ve worked diligently near every day
Writing down everything I had to say
Planting many colorful fields of rhyme
And generally having a very good time
But as good as things are I must admit
Something is missing for a perfect fit
For what is a writer without readers
Or a prophet without true believers
So I invite you into my literary home
Invite you to visit and to freely roam
Thru the still crisp pages of my mind
I do hope you like what you find
To live is to lie
To lie is to fall
To fall from grace
Is the greatest life of all
the off-grid life.
untied from the shackles of strife,
2017, the modern existence,
getting on the property ladder, how does anyone have a chance?
20, 25 or 30, forced to work to pay every bill,
going to work all hours, struggling to find a way, a life against our will,
needing the money from any form of work, mostly unprogressive, unhappy
life passing by, frustrating, anger, decreasing self-worth, causing individuals to be snappy
unfulfilled, potentials are not met, working a job all day, unable to progress,
money is the key factor, for bills to be met, let me digress.
often they still aren't causing pain and suffering, stress and depression,
homelessness is rife through the country, a feeling of regression,
a feeling of being stuck, how to retrain and improve your careers?
speak to friends or family and the same conversation, doubts, and fears
if only another option was available,
one that was accepted and not just for the vulnerable,
the homeless, the people with nothing,
but how is this existence different? it is truly crushing,
once you can see that your life is consumed with working for money,
the soul has passed, your energy too, it can get so hard it's not even funny,
but who understands? in the face of consumerism, higher purchase, loans, and debt,
who is living a life, truly satisfied, and their dreams are met?
Not all people living off-grid are rich in cash!
but they aim for other needs; security in food & energy, it's worth a bash,
a growing transition for many people too,
it's not just for the hippies, the spiritual, it's for people like me and you,
think about it for a moment or two...
who would you be without your car, house and your possessions?
is that person you portray the real you? or do you blend in so people don't ask questions?
are you honest with your family and friends?
or do you sit behind a desk wishing it would end?
there is a wealth of knowledge of old traditions,
from a time when they lived without these conditions,
the conditions of social media, advertising, marketing ads or vlogs
when screen time didn't consume every waking hour, and children were fascinated with tadpoles transforming into frogs.
hours spent outside, climbing trees, playing at the park,
not allowed home unless it was tea time or had gotten dark.
a shift is happening, ecotherapy, wild schooling, bushcraft, and hikes,
forest schooling, homeschooling, people walking and out on their bikes,
scientists are noticing the effects on children's behaviors, reduced health issues,
ADHD, also a boost in self-awareness, positivity, confidence and mental health issues
is it easier to sit a child down to hours in front of the tv, or ipad?
than it is to spend a few hours playing down the park with dad?
or baking a cake with mum, the importance of these skills are being misplaced,
in this consumerism world, with employees a number, in a life so fast-paced.
Off-grid living, the communities hidden away,
all they want is a parcel of land to look after their needs, but hey,
that's not possible, 'cause where will the local council get their tax,
with the community, living off the land, growing food and chopping wood with an axe,
the need and usage of government-owned services would become minute,
living simply and within your skills of the land, renewables used, an abundance of fruit,
food preserved in many forms, jams and chutneys, frozen meat,
enough food to last year-round to survive through winter, or in the heat,
the food produced off the land, tending the garden, and grown for nutrition,
the most important for life and health also said to aid in remission.
off grid homesteaders, don't need to take the flack,
with health as the focus, working outdoors to provide, lowering the need for prozac,
comments from shallow minded people need not be said,
the power of community, working together, I want to spread,
to include children in the transition, of conserving nature and our wildlife,
the tranquil setting amongst the seasons, watching the stars, that's my type of nightlife.
I have four true and loyal friends,
And one of them is the best of all,
But, even he, stopped contact for months,
I felt as if I had reached the ends.
It's difficult, very hard, to stay alone,
To have no friend nearby to talk to,
My mother and kids do stay at home,
But it's a friend I need with whom, who,
I can talk about anything in this world,
My joys and sorrows, my days and nights,
And if the one who is the best of all,
Avoids me, I know that it is not right.
I lost my other online friend a year ago,
And one more has disappeared totally,
Now I spend my days and nights waiting,
Talking to God and wishing somehow,
One of my best friends will call me on phone,
Or write me an email and chat with me,
Yet nothing of this sort ever happened,
I was left with myself, all alone.
The days pass by but when the sun sets,
And dusk welcomes the night's darkness,
I wish I had a soul by my side,
A loving soul to share my worst, my best.
Linda Ronsdatd's song: "Round Midnight",
Moves me to tears as I keep listening,
Friendship is closer and stronger than love,
No arguing here and surely no fight.
Thomas Gray's "Elegy" is my heart: speaking;
It is as if I too am bound to suffer,
The dusk and nights without a friend, a love,
Maybe that's how God has destined my being.
I do pray to my Creator and wish I could,
See Him or at least hear from Him,
But only quietness, silence and solitude,
Stay with me till the sun lifts its hood.