poem

No Self Esteem

I never feel good enough

I have no self esteem

I tend to sabotage my stuff

Do you know what I mean

 

What Do I Know Anyway

I have nothing important to say

What do I know anyway

No one cares what I think

I could be the missing link

 

The more I learn the less I know

and yet I get on with the show

I know I don't know everything

No one does no matter what they think

 

Those who know that they don't know

have lots and lots of room to grow

Those who think they know it all

are pushed up against a wall

 

Keep an open mind

maybe you will find

that you can unwind

that's how it's designed

Fewa in A Mug of Coffee

A moment on the Cyber Café at Fewa Lake

                                               

1.

In the Mug of the Fewa Lake

Reflecting the pure blueness of the sky

With the fluttering of the Fishtail

My eyes sparkle with

The taste of organic coffee

That chills my throat

By the tranquil and serene Fishtail

My whole heart at ease

In a mug of coffee.

                                               

2.

Faraway in the foothill

A heavenly village

Of the stone houses in row

From the black slated rooftops

Pours the rains of golden rays

By the blushing evening

My tender lips taste

The beauty of village green

Into mellifluous nectar

In a mug of coffee.

                                               

3.

From the field of greenery

Resonates the incredible laughter

Of the village girls

With the flocks of sheep

Back to their village homes 

Reveals their enticing beauties

This dusky moment creates

The heartthrob of the village

As an allegory of folk song  

In a mug of coffee.

         

4.

On the west side of Fewa Lake

In harmony with the Eve

A charming couple, newly married

Inebriated in ardor and fervor

Cruises on a wooden boat

Into the waters of the Fewa lake

With dancing rudders itch

The ripple and surge of

Foamy and bubbly love

In a mug of coffee.


5

Around the Annapurna range

Tiny airplanes

Like the white butterflies

Fluttering in the air 

The corneas of the eyes

Kiss the tops of the Himalayas

In the Annapurna ranges

Perceive the gesture with

Miracle and marvel

In a mug of coffee. 


6

In the lucid and clear gloom

Before the breaking of dawn

The Eyes of the Sarangkot

Grasp the Himalaya ranges

Glowing like the blaze  

Of the golden mountains

My beholding eyes in awe!

As the sun rises up the East

The Himalayas resume

Its splendor into silvery beauty

In a mug of coffee.


7

Like the fairy in Fairy tales

With imitated wings

My beloved glides high

From the lofty height of Sarankot

Her eyes scribble the poetry –

Serenity of Fewa,

Tranquility of Fishtail

Vivacity of Pokhara,

The visitors in bliss

On the verge of Fewa lake I’m

Waiting for her to land

The metaphor tastes sugary

In a mug of coffee.


8

The Raniban hills

In the south of the Fewa lake 

My fatigued legs

Ascend the stone paths

To the top of the Raniban hill

The Raniban Resort

Silence of nowhere

Quiet, still and calm

As if living in another planet

With hot frothy black coffee

In a mug of coffee.


9.

Hanging from the sky

Thrives atop the Raniban

The blooming Garden

Enjoying the amazing Evening,

The unannounced rain shower

The essence of my body  

So cool and weary,

Desires the tepid and balmy                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                

Black coffee that springs into  

The warmth over my body  

In a mug of coffee.


10

From the top of the resort

My eyes glimpse beneath 

Serene and calm Mug of Fewa lake

Tranquil and quite Sarankot

Emerald green Raniban

Surroundings of

So many hilltops

Of green and greeneries

My body enlightens itself too

Into hill of greenery

As the sky darkens

Intense black is the coffee

In a mug of coffee.


11

All my belonging left

In a city lodge,

Only me and my beloved 

Only with unspoken word

Like the simile and metaphor

My poetry of love

Warm embrace

In a lone room

Of the Raniban resort

The essence of passion spills over

In a mug of coffee.

*

 

 

অপ্রীতিকর অনুভুতি

আমি এক দেহত্যাগী
ছুটে চলা উল্কা,
কিছুটা স্রোতের মতই বিভ্রান্ত;
শান্ত বুকের ভেতর অস্থির এক যন্ত্রনা পুষে রাখি-
যে অনবরত গায় বিচ্ছেদের গীত!

অবচেতন মনে ভালবাসার অকারণ পিছুটান নেই-
তাই বিন্দু বিন্দু জমাট ঘামের মত,
রুমালে মুছে দেই জমায়িত ভালবাসা;
আমার আকাশ ভাঙ্গা বৃষ্টির প্রেমে পড়ে-
ভিজতে এসে, 
তুমি যে অভিপ্রায়
করেছ সঞ্চয় গোপনে;
তার ভাল-মন্দের পার্থক্য বুঝা খুব জরুরী।

কারন,
আমার কানে বিকট শোনায় প্রেমের শব্দ আহ্লাদের চুম্বনে-
ছোট ছোট সুখগুলো কবেই তো পুড়ে গেছে বজ্রপাতে জীবনের পথে,
ডুবে গেছে ভালবাসার গঙ্গা জলে শুদ্ধ হতে যেয়ে;
যদি আবার ভুল করে ফেলি-
মাথা গুঁজে দেই এফিটাফে!
ধ্বংসাবশেষটা পড়ে থাকবে,
আবেগহীন অভিব্যক্তির পাতায়-
পৃথিবী জুড়ে,
নিখোঁজ সংবাদের তালিকায়।

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সমান্তরালে স্থাপন

হৃদয়ের পাঠ্যপুস্তকে এখনও অনুপস্থিত তোমার গল্প-
গল্পের সংজ্ঞাগুলো বিশ্লেষণ করতে পারেনি বলে,
সত্যোন্মোচন ঘটেনি তোমার উপেক্ষার!
তাই বার বার আঙ্গিকের আলোচনায় আলোচিত হবে তুমি-
আত্ননিমগ্ন এক মানুষের আত্মিক শিক্ষালয়ে।

আমার দারিদ্র জীবনের সুখ তৃষ্ণা শুধু তুমি,
কাল্পনিক ভাল থাকার সহচর বান্ধব হয়ে-
রূপ-বৈচিত্র্য ছড়িয়েছ সঙীন অবসরে একাকী নীরবে;
আমার অর্থহীন জীবনের অপ্রকাশিত শব্দের অভিধানে,
পেয়েছি বিস্ময়ের জাগরণ তোমার স্পর্শে!

বিশ্ববিধানের আস্থাবান চিত্তবৃত্তি থেকে খুঁজেছি এক নিপুণ মেলবন্ধন-
সর্বাপেক্ষা উপযোগী সমান্তরালে ভালবাসা স্থাপন করার প্রত্যায়ে,
নতুনভাবে আবিষ্কৃত পুরানো চেতনার সুস্পষ্ট উচ্চারণে-
তোমাকে চিৎকার করে বলতে চাই:
কপালিয়া কনকলতা,
আমি তোমাকে ভালবাসি আমার আনকোরা মনের গহীন থেকে।

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কয়েক ফোঁটা অশ্রু!

তুমি দেখতে পাওনি বলে
আমার অশ্রুজল গড়িয়ে পড়েছে-
তপ্ত বালুর বুকে, কংক্রিটে;
চুপি চুপি অতি গোপনে
নীল সমুদ্র জলে মিশে গেছে আমার কয়েক ফোঁটা অশ্রু!

তোমার বুকের মাঝে জমেছে বিষাদের পবিত্র পাথর,
আমার জন্য তা নয়-
জমেছে আঘাতের প্রতিদান দিতে আমার মত কারোর জন্য;
সে তো আমি নই তবুও কেন হেলা আমাকে?
উচিত জবাব না পাওয়াটা বড় লজ্জার-
যা তুমি ভুলে গেছো আত্মহংকারে।

নিখাঁদ ভালবাসার শর্ত নেই
বিভোর রাতে চুপি চুপি কথা আছে অল্প কিছু,
অতি সামন্য ঈষৎ সংক্ষিপ্ত;
তোমাকে হারানোর মত যথেষ্ট-
অথবা ফিরানোর জন্য পর্যাপ্ত,
আমার অশ্রু ঝরানোর ছোট ফন্দিটা
একদিন অনেক কাজে আসবে তোমার।

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Is Antigone a Study of Human Actions, with Complex Emotions. Why?

Sophocles play Antigone is a great example of an Ancient Greek poem. This tragedy is full of questions that were important for people a long time ago and did not lose its actuality until now. The main heroes are searching for truth – should they follow their hearts and unwritten rules of society or listen to decisions of kings and rulers? Sophocles play shows the whole range of people’s emotions – love for family, anger, pain from losing close people, and desperation.
Each character of Sophocles tragedy fights with his fears and prejudice. Internal conflict tors apart the main heroine of the play. Antigone has to go against society and disobey decree of her uncle Creon, in order to follow her family duty and the words of the ancestors. She truly believes that Polyneices has to be buried according to all the rules and traditions. Antigone is shown as a brave woman, who stays faithful to her believes, even knowing that she can die. “But I will bury him [Polyneices]; and if I must die, I say that this crime is holy: I shall lie down With him in death, and I shall be as dear To him as he to me” (Sophocles 55-58). She cannot see anything wrong in her actions; she believes her crime is “pure” and will be forgiven by gods and people.
Creon is shown as a cruel dictator, who put law and government higher than fear for gods and respect to traditions. He is listening neither to Antigone nor his son Haemon. He believes in what he is doing and does not have mercy even to his niece. He realized his mistakes only after losing everyone he loves – his son and wife. “Big words are always punished, And proud men in old age learn to be wise” (1041-1042) – these words show that Creon gains his wisdom only through the taste of loss and suffering.
Play “Antigone” is a reflection of that time society. Sophocles perfectly described heroes’ inner conflicts. It is a real study of human actions, the story of  internalfight and a great book of people’s emotions.
 
Works Cited
Sophocles. Antigone. An English Version by Dudley Fitts and Robert Fitzgerald, 1 st ed., Brace and company, 1939.
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Time and Memories {Revisited}

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Love

I dreamed a dream of stars and light

Shining brightly in the night

But then I saw, to my surprise

That they existed in your eyes


I had an illusion of desire

It's scarlet flames were rising higher

And soon after we took flight

You quickly vanished in the night


I gained an insight of your being

Sitting, broken, hopeless-feeling

I sat next to you, contrite

To tell you it was all alright 


I bear a vision, dark and deep

It has me turning in my sleep

Your memories I'll keep and keep

As I sit to sigh and weep

 
Author's Notes/Comments: 

Just felt like tweaking it a bit, the first part is still my favorite

13th n i g h t {The Ritual}

Folder: 
13

Dark Shadows shift in the gloom
13 Skulls on The Altar this 13th Night
13 Candles 'round The Pentagram
Bloodmoon on the horizon
Hellfires rise to meet the eclipse
Devils through The Black Mirrors pass
The fire gives substance
Robed phantoms come forth to The Center each
Grasp the crystal oracle to view the spheres
Enter in 13 Dimensions, The Demon Eye opens

 

 

On the 13th Night
All is not as it seems
On the 13th Night
The Air alive with Magic & Mystery
On the 13th Night
That which should not before your eyes



Hellknell tolls thirteen
Throughout The House's 13 rooms
Accept the Goblet, consecration, condemnation
Affirmation of The Diabolical eternal
Rebirth of the damned thirteen returned
Disrobed, Possession of The Sacrifice!
Craniums aglow, revealing masks & faces
WE HAVE RETURNED... Nightmares come alive!

 

 

On the 13th Night
All is not as it seems
On the 13th Night
The Air alive with Magic & Mystery
On the 13th Night
That which should not before your eyes



Let the incense permeate
The Draegon's wings bestow Satanas winds
Thy breath course across the moon
Cobweb veils billow lunalight
A Great Presence is felt, emergent
Seated upon The Blackthrone
Hissing serpents & familiars clairvoyant
Watching Wraithful manifest

 

 

On the 13th Night
All is not as it seems
On the 13th Night
The Air alive with Magic & Mystery
On the 13th Night
That which should not before your eyes



Churches burn by The Word
Incense of Hellfire upon the wind
Defilement of The Sanctuary by the possessed
Dash the oil on marbled floor
Sacrilege of the holy relics
Blaspheme the idols divine
Replacing godog, bowing before Baphomet
Death Angel, clerical sacrifice
Blindlight dims in the smoke, extinguished forever

Author's Notes/Comments: 

The Ritual. The Shadow Priest officiates before The Black Altar, as 13 robed figures emerge from the darkness into the infernalight of thirteen candles encircling The Pentagram upon the Chamber floor, each taking up a crystal skull. Upon the Wicked Words spoken, The Demons emerge, granted substance by the sulfur & brimstone-laden candle hellflames, from the looking glass and into the cranial oracles, then into the demon eyes opened, reawakening dread incarnations now seated in the flesh of the newly possessed. Demons released, the rite causes reverberations upon nearby sanctuaries defiled & enflamed.

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