secrets

Nothing but a Fable

Happily ever after doesn’t exist.

Not when people like you also exist.

I bought myself a new suit of armor so you don’t drive another knife in my back.

I told the vendor to hold the stallion because human legs were never for aesthetic purposes.

 

I wanted to walk the face of the Earth with you using my own.

We would’ve walked more than a thousand miles together to chase the sun and avoid the night.

And I never needed to worry about my tired legs.

They built up a tolerance from walking in the coastal sand and helping me keep up with dirty dishes.

 

I told you about my demons and how quickly I am to care when I’m shown an act of kindness.

Mother always lectured me that no matter how small they may be, they are never in vain.

But there is such a thing as being too kind. There is such a thing as temptation.

The best of us cave in once, twice, or maybe more than that when we write in our diaries.

 

You were like such a book to me and I trusted you, but never did I expect that you’d defile my soul

By persuading me to partake in activities that I would never in my right mind do.

I should have recalled the fable of a girl who trusted a poltergeist that haunted a similar diary.

Had I not flee the moment I saw your true character, I would have joined her in death.

 

Looking back, I understand that diaries are the keys to starting fires and turning innocents into fugitives.

You can try with all your might to pry my mouth open to get me to spill any more beans

But my lips are staying sealed because I know who you really are and I finally learned my lesson.

You never exposed me. You only leaked a chapter that was part of a book you never read.

 

So why bother showing it to you knowing that my real friends and family will be endangered as well?

I know that a deluded man gambled away so much ammo to the vipers that he became a trainwreck.

I swear on my recurring nightmares that any answers to your questions will be used against me.

Truth and justice is a concept invented by people and after all, people do make mistakes.

 

God bless the right to remain silent.

Because even the condemned understand that its value supersedes a vault of gold

That the draconian blackjack dealers steal from the poor that desire to play with them.

Where was Robin Hood when I needed him most?

 

Flash forward to a single year and I’m now twenty-five with an art degree in hand.

I’ve spent all that time studying my ass off and avoiding the vipers that plague my past.

I was with my true friends who never give a shit about your deceit when I realized I never needed you.

Preparing for financial exams under the tutelage of a bright mathematician was like you never existed.

 

So the next time you see me, I won’t grovel on the pavement begging you to take me back.

Instead, I’ll look the other way and French kiss my new admirer in front of you.

Just to let you know that I changed for the better and you missed out on the life we could’ve had.

I am fortunate to understand that your absence last summer turned out to be a blessing in disguise.

 

I dare you to call me an idiot again!

I dare you to call me a chicken!

I dare you to say that I’m going down

While you hide behind the blackjack dealers that love you for show!

 

There’s always someone out there willing to give you a taste of your own medicine anyway.

How did it feel when even Discordia didn’t want anything to do with you?

Was it salty and sour like your attitude and your deceit?

Cavities caused by the consumption of these candies are a pain for dentists to fill.

 

And just like that, you disappeared from the face of the Earth again. Hopefully, for good this time.

You can erase your identity from the world, but you cannot erase the marks your venom left behind.

You may still be on my mind from time to time, but I don’t see you in a virtuous light anymore.

You are nothing but a fable.

I Am Never Alone

You’ve done it again. You’ve done it again, mate.

You went back on your word when you promised you’d stick with me in the long run.


Even if our passion moved far too quickly at first.

Before it simmered down to give us time to intercept our demons.

 

It should’ve been the other way around.

In an age where I can’t see your face nor can I hold your hand,

 

It’s become a force of habit that I wish I could stop partaking in.

I love too quickly because I am a freak scared of being molded into something I’m not.

 

Regardless of my desire, I still have to know what goes on in your own life.

That either excites you, scares you, angers you, saddens you, and soothes you.

 

I’d have to appreciate you before my infatuation gets the better of me and it evolves into love.

I never planned to stop caring even after finding out your weight was dangerously high.

 

I was reassured that you planned to take care of yourself, but you never knew that.

You didn’t know what to do nor what to say when I didn’t find out about your size sooner.

 

You didn’t want to shove me away, but you did.

You didn’t want to hurt me, but you did.

 

You said you were interested in me, but you weren’t.

You said you weren’t in it for short-term happiness, but you were.

 

All because you turned your back on me when I was willing to keep you tight regardless.

You are such a damn fraud that vies for a sugar bowl that I am fighting tirelessly to keep.

 

How many sorries does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

I could let you know when you get it to turn on.

But how can I notify you if you severed ties with me?

Since you ran away, an apology is as empty as your soul.

 

You turned out to be just like your exes and here I am, telling you, “Fuck your love quest.”

It’s not like you’re going to take it again anytime soon nevertheless.

 

Lonely pieces of crap only want to love when they wish for an early death.

Were you trying to gasp for air when the ocean took away your breath?

 

If you’re still wondering why you’ll never find love, I’ve got bad news for you.

The way you made my heart beat for you until you made a crack in it is the answer to your question.

 

You may never know this about me because I don’t always realize it myself.

But when I embrace a soul whose loyalty and compassion is unbreakable,

 

I realize that I am never alone.

They may face obstacles and heartaches of their own, but they never let them tear them apart.

 

One day, I’ll find love of my own and I continue to pray that it will be as true as my friendships.

What a shame that you’ll never see that I am never alone.

The Elephant in My Cell

You came at a bad time.

A terribly, terribly bad time.

You showed up the moment I couldn’t stand to touch you.

I was afraid you were never going to come.

I should have been glad you came, but why am I not relieved?

Is it that crippling fear that the moment I touch you, you fade away like a ghost?

Is it that you might be a whistleblower looking for an insecurity to use against me later?

Or is it that you are trying to distract me from tending to my garden before it dies of thirst?

 

I want to shout, “Why didn’t you come sooner?!”

I want to shout, “Where were you when I needed you most?!”

I want to yell at the top of my lungs, “Would it kill you to tell me what’s driving you away from me?!!”

But I am too nice. Too kind and gentle to scream and point to the elephant in the room.

The very elephant that a sorcerer pulled out of his hat and crippled both of my limbs.

 

I never wanted to call for help because it reinforces the notion that I should still be in high school.

I’ve crawled around all year avoiding the other teenage drama queens that worship dragons.

Seems like they forgot that dragons like to steal our fortunes and our hearts. Before they eat them.

 

Spending time with my open-minded little brother has planted a seed of doubt in my head.

A seed that gets me thinking that all love does to me is waste my time experimenting with false hope.

 

My imaginary nights with a fallen angel goes along the lines of;

“Yes, yes, honey, shower me with hugs and kisses. Oh, my love, how I yearn for you.

Pleasure me with your lust until the water in your veins runs out and you become a raisin.

Only then, will I toss you in the sun and wonder why the hell I’ve never gotten lucky.”

When will the water cycle end for the both of us?

What compels Venus to bewitch me to make bad choices?

Why else do you think independent seekers with degrees in hand avoid commitment?

Our grandparents and parents are more patient than our generation is now

Because compared to us, they tended to their gardens and their raisins.

You did a bang-up job tending to me by showering me with promises you can’t keep,

With complex wisdom about human nature, stories of your struggle to get your education over with,

And the snuggles and touches that I wished were real more than the chains I dream of shattering.

 

You’ve made this game look so easy, you know?

All that had impressed me about you lately is how you’ve lured me into your arms,

Only to neglect me without warning when the sun was at its hottest.

Part of me does not wish to see you go because I tolerate the pain that your absence has left behind.

You scarcely have time on your hands, but would you care to join me for a cup of jasmine tea?

It won’t take long. What I want to know next is what else is new that you have yet to tell me?

My Beloved

My Beloved

 

Please, someone take away from me

this sweet and tender toxin that

my beloved put in me.

I have been impaled by

his horns engorged and dripping with

his passionate poison embracing me.

I was weakened from his chase,

and could no longer flee.

 

Now I am disintegrating.

Red ink flows from my well.

I lie embedded in scarlett earth,

where my beloved trampled me.

 

No longer can I stand.

So, friend, do help me pass.

If you bend and hear my breath,

bring me to peace at last.

 

Down black waters I will drift

ever closer to the place

where Charon waits for me,

with pennies set upon my face.

 

Fran Hinkle

 

5/21/19

 

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tags:

History

Folder: 
Band Lyrics

Verse 1:
Forget everything, I hope we can.

Falling like a shooting star.

Where do we go when the light’s not changing?

Tell me if I can feel with my old heart again.

In my changed heart, I still carry the old feelings of our love.

In your mind, we’ve already just ended.

To our friends: we were perfect for each other.


Chorus:
On my face, you can see it clearly

That I want to use up everything I have

To repair our broken past.

Tell me, if you feel the same as me.

Our ships are anchored to each other.

Somewhere, somehow, I’ll find my way back to us.

 

Verse 2:

We have chemistry and history but

Tell me: what do you really feel about us?

Tell me if we’re better off as friends

Or just forbidden lovers in this world.

Tell me everything you are.

Tell me all the stories you have for now.

I can just tell that you’ve struggled in this cold world.

 

Bridge:
Can someone show me how to run away?

You have all of me yet

I’m left with nothing of you.

If there is any way:

Know that I’ll always love you.

Know that I’ll always be there for you.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

About a love that you cannot just forget....

God Is Greater!

God is Greater!

So, don’t fear bad weather, news, and the taunts of your haters

You show God’s love by forgiving and unfailingly loving all your neighbors

Do!

And it shall be given upon to you

For you are blessed and highly favored by God

All these things shall be giving a billion-fold of what was robbed

For, Great is God than he or it of this world

Use your talents to uplift all man, woman, boy, and girl

For the time has come

My Dear Chosen One

To spread your wings and fly

Flying high amongst the sky

For your dreams are big bigger than you can do yourself

So, learn to depend and to submit to someone else

For, the greatest good

Use your gifts to uplift and pull others out of the ghetto and hood

I wish I could touch you and hold you tight

For, this is a fight for your soul’s life

Get Right

And get dress for church to go hear the Word

Trust, eventually you live out what is heard

For no man can stop what God has already ordained as His own

I pray, let His Holy Spirit live in your body your temple your home

I promise with God you’re never alone

I speak victory

I hope you hear me

Greatness, Purity, Holiness, and Wholeness

For you are greater than this!

I speak rise up him and her!

Pick up your bed, walk into your true worth, and sin no more for  

God is Greater!

By Katrina T. Smith Copyrighted

 

I have your Word, visit the website below 

 

http://www.itjusthadtobeheard.com/

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Let Your Light So Shine!!!

THE SECRET TREE

Sally came running in the door…”Grandma I have a secret!” She yelled.

It’s a really, really good secret…but I promised not to tell.”

 

“I want to keep my promise but you don’t know how hard it’s been.”

“Trying not to tell anyone…trying to keep this secret in.”

 

Sally looked up at her Grandma…her wide eyes, big and blue…

“Grandma can you help me?  Grandma tell me what to do?”

 

Grandma took Sally out to her back yard saying…“There’s something I want you to see.

They sat down under a very large oak… “This is my secret tree.”

 

“Grandma…” Sally laughed …”This is not a secret tree!

Everybody knows about it…everyone can see…”

 

Grandma put a finger to her lips…and gently shook her head

“The tree is not the secret, silly…it’s what it holds.” she said.

 

Ever since I was a little girl…and a secret was given to me

I’d hurry home and sit right here…underneath this very tree.”

 

“And when I was sure I was alone…that secret I’d retrieve

then I would let that secret out and share it with the leaves.

 

And so this tree is filled with secrets…every secret I ever brought

secrets she will never tell…and some I’m sure I’ve long forgot….

 

With that Grandma stood up and walked away…happy as can be

leaving Sally all alone in the shade of her secret tree.

 

On her way to the house Grandma turned around and smiled…

She couldn’t be sure but she believes

Sally was whispering to the tree

 

sharing her secret with the leaves.


A Broken Glass

Folder: 
Human

 



A broken glass               

pointed angles all over

giving off its light dimly

Waiting for a trigger.     

  

The broken glass may be a piece of Diamond 

Creating Aura from its universe

Strength from its nucleus

Fragility in shadow

Silence in clearness

 

Words in color

Beauty in balance

Passion in calm

Reflection from darkness

 

See all these sincerities appear on his surface

just exists for someone to find

 

 

 

 

 

Author's Notes/Comments: 

 

I wrote this poem when I met a man who has beautiful mind but he does not know it himself.

 

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Thoughts On Life and Mortality

The ancients declared that all is meaningless

A chasing after the wind

 

The modernists claim that nothing is real

A consuming, constant dream

 

So what shall we say on our mortality;

What should we surmise of our souls?

 

We've all been screaming what we want to hear

And yet the truth quietly whispers, drowning our voices

 

We pay our very souls to safely cross the river Styx

Only to find that we can't leave Charon without them

 

We give our all to gain what our hearts desire,

And realize that we have lost everything to gain nothing

 

What man can bring back one second of his life;

Yet time seems worthless without entertainment

 

We campaign to save our fellow man,

By placing funds in already full pockets

 

Humans are dimensional amphibians, living both spirit and body,

The ghost in the machine

 

How light a heart in love!

How heavy a heart in sorrow

 

The weight of a soul drags me down

But hope can keep me alight

 

We strive for goodness through deeds and laws,

But laws are not for good deeds, or good people

 

We cannot live long alone, and yet push others away,

Until we are left with only our “selves”

 

We push and strive to become better than ourselves

Yet we can only grow inside our own nature

 

At what point in our quest to become God

Did we convert into the devil instead?

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