Tell Me a Story

Tell me a story

I've never heard before

Of faraway lands

And long-distant shores

Of knights and their honor

Of sweet maidens fair

Exercise your eloquence

To transport me there


Tell me a story

Of love won and lost

Of heroes unwavering

No matter the cost

Sing me a lullaby

Of joy and regret

And maybe, just maybe

I'll learn to forget

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It was a given, though you should have earned it.

A mistake I keep repeating;

As if I am not learning shit.





Now, deemed worthless.

But you tell me how I feel.

You can tell me if this is real.

Did I make this mess?



Ridiculous, spitting words like this is a spelling test.


Memento mori, you turned your back on me.

I'm a human fucking being.

Excuse me for grieving, the death of myself.


Banging on a cardboard coffin.

Hands bloodied, dont feel the hurt.

Don't think of all the dirt gettin in;

Make it up up to the surface,

don't let them win.


I can feel the grass and tug at it rough.

Crawling out, organs a mess.

"Not today, Satan"

I tell myself in a huff.

Tired of going through things.

I've seen enough.


Trying to avoid hurt.

Licking my wounds.

Not self consumed.

Begining to breathe now.

It's like I've forgotten how.

Throat full of earth, I throw it up.

Dust off my dress, 

Memories of being alive with cough syrup.

Walking dead at this point,

barely breathing.


Simply trying to heal.

The coffin I left behind is real.

With a piece of myself in there.

"There lies a piece of Betty"

No one cares.

"A tenacious woman that always cared"


Now I'm up here.

Human being amongst people.



Too tenacious to die, too emotional to be alive.

Simply trying to deal;

With things I should have never felt.


These are just the cards,

that I have been dealt.

One cannot control that,

But how they handle their hand.


I cannot control what life hands me,

but I can take a stand.


I refuse to me told how I feel,

My emotions are valid.

I am real.

I've got balls of steel;

They are just misplaced.

I am not something to be forgotten,

Something you can simply replace.


You mistreat me, or try to break me down.

I go Casper.

You don't find me anywhere in town.

I'm a woman, I deserve respect.

But, I get treated like a Leper.

A damn reject.


This mental illness is at the steering wheel.

I get barked at for this so much, I can no longer feel.

You want to control me?

Take a number.

You can't even handle me.




But, I am, so it comes out that way

But, I am, so it comes out that way

By jfarrell


(Bill Hicks was a legend, sorely missed)


I don’t mean to be full of hate and bitterness,

Spiteful, wanting to hurt back,

But, I am, so it comes out that way.


I don’t mean to treat you with disrespect,

And nonchalantly dismiss your views;

But, that’s the way it comes out.


I used to work with nursery children,

I was full of care, understanding and empathy;

And it came out that way.


I wanted to be loved;


And I couldn’t let that show at all.


After all these years….


I don’t mean to want everyone who ever hurt me to hurt, horribly;

To die slowly, and in as much agony, as my imagination can conjure;

But, I do, so it comes out that way.


Author's Notes/Comments: 

"I don't mean to sound cold and heartless, but I am, so it comes out that way" or something like that. Bill Hicks was a genius

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No Regrets

If I could I would beat your


fucking face in


No regrets


Do the time in jail


and i'd probably do it all over again


that's how much I fucking hate you


all those tears I cried and nights


I stayed up wondering why


that shit's dead


You never gave a fuck


it was clear


You beat my freaking heart in


and now I want your life to end


do the time in jail


and i'd do the shit all over again


No regrets


You played with my heart and my mind


now I want your soul to jump out and cry


I want you to stay up wondering why


and eventually you'll know exactly why


You knew you wasn't shit


Wanna watch you take you last breath


do the time in jail 


and i'd do it all over again


No regrets


but your lesson was learned. 



Author's Notes/Comments: 

-No Mercy, for every action has a consequence. 

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Please, don't love me

I have more love to give you

Love you could never give back

I have a dark secret I hide

Its if you try love me I'll be selfish, greedy and tell u you lie

At first I'll be fine, and say I don't mind

"I'm just more affectionate but I'm happy you try"


But please, don't love me, I'm selfish and cruel

"why won't you kiss me like I wanted you to"

It because you lie and you don't love me do yoi


You say alot, and try show me you do

But I know that you don't, do you think I'm a fool


As time goes on, you will distance yourself.


I'll hurt you for love that I know you can't give








you Love me , remember


now this part I hate, because this is the truth

I'm voilent , I'm nasty

I'm selfish,  I'm cruel

I hate me so much..And I hate u still love me as much as u do



I beg you. 


Don't love me

Cause one day will come when you will hate me so much

for what I've become

My heart will be broken, and yours will be to

I love you 

I hate me

Now you hate me to




Author's Notes/Comments: 

First poem I think it's a poem

I honestly lost the one last good thing in my life because I wouldn't believe that I deserved it.

And truth is.

I don't think I did

stop the flow

Stop the Flow

By JFarrell


I opened the vessel

And so much came out

I was overwhelmed and swept away

Giddy, dizzy

Dropped on the floor

Panting, gasping for breath

I had no idea

So much was there


And I didn’t imagine it could hurt anyone

I didn’t stop to think

How others might feel

And I am sorry for that.


I  don’t want to slop the flow

But, maybe, I can shape it into something nicer

More pleasant to experience

With no chance of anyone getting hurt

Magicians and butterflies

Clouds and stars

Brighter futures



Author's Notes/Comments: 

i didn't know i could write until i tried

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What happen?

just notes*

I miss the feel of your touch
I miss the feel of you lips
What happen to us
What happen to you
I feel neglected
And maybe it sounds selfish
But I get nothing from you
Am I not pretty enough
Am I not want you want
Is it me?
What happen to us
I miss your touch
I miss you

I sit here next to you
And I get nothing
Did we lose our spark
What should I do...

I feel like I should walk away ...

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Right or Wrong?


Liar, cheater, whore, bitch


You call me a cheater but you can never see


The hurt and pain you caused me


I was silently pleading for your attention


A little more of embrace, warm affection


But you blatantly ignored me


As if I was a ghost; I didn't exist


Is it my fault, though?


The truth is plain to see: You forgot to love me


I couldn't take it anymore seemingly trapped in a web


The endless karmic cycle of unhappiness and misery which I weaved


Until I saw a shimmering light


A flicker of happiness which blinded my sight


I saw hope and brightness in the arms of another


A love that was much more pure and real than you've ever shown me


I then knew what was missed in my life


I've found new love and they treat me better and gave me more love than you ever would or even could


Yes, I lied....


Yes, I cheated....


But in the end, I'm not the one to blame


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Were This A Suicide Note From Me


Were this a suicide note, from me,

I'd tell you all one final goodbye,

With phony words you won't read,

Saying, For me, please don't cry.

But this is just my simple truth,

So I know no one really even will,

Shed one honest, heartfelt tear,

If my own life...were I to kill.


Were this a suicide note, from me,

I'd ask forgiveness for what I've done.

I'd especially be sorry to,

My daughter...and my sons.

But this is my real existance,

So in fact, no one would care,

That I'd felt the need to end it,

Because the pain was too much to bear.


Were this a suicide note, from me,

I'd tell the one I gave my heart,

Of how he shouldn't pine and weep for me,

And make a brand new start.

But this is just more factual,

To say he'd get over me real fast.

That those words were empty promises,

That were never meant to last.


Were this a suicide note, from me,

I'd say all those final things I'd need to say-

Like, Remember me with smiles,

And remember those happier days.

But this is my own reality,

And they only seem to forget my love,

That for everyone, I only gave my all,

But I was so easy to be disposed of.


Were this a suicide note, from me,

I'd remind everyone I love them true.

That this was just my only way out-

To be free from hurt, I did, what I had to do.

But this is just a fantasy note,

Because I'd rather leave it all unsaid.

For they don't care, or love me, while alive,

So why would they, were I dead?



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