I do

I do

 

 

Do you know what it feels like to have never been loved?

Do you know what it feels like to have never been liked?

Do you know what it feels like to hear the words, believing it, only to be bluffed?

Do you know what it feels like to feel liked, told you are liked, only to be able to get ‘’their’’ true intentions right?

 

I do

 

Do you know what it feels like to have your heart broken for 42 years?

The hurt never ever goes away, or fades, it stays

Do you know what it feels like to realize each and every time you’ve just been fooled, and tears…

Well the tears never dry up, it lasts for decades

 

I do

 

Do you know what it feels like to be used your entire life?

Do you know what it feels like to be the one who always has to heal, and help?

At your own emotional and financial loss, just to serve your purpose in life?

Do you know what it feels like to know, that you will never have anyone when you need help?

 

I do

 

Do you know what it feels like to only be viewed and desired as sexual object?

Do you know what it feels like to only be used and viewed as emotional help?

Do you know what it feels like to fall in love with the only outcome being: reject?

Do you know what it feels like to carry your Mother from birth knowing she didn’t want you, she wished you could just melt

 

I do

 

Do you know what it feels like to work your entire life only to survive?

Do you know what it feels like to be hated by most females, due to jealousy?

Do you know what it feels like to live with so much hatred from strangers just because you are alive?

Do you know what it feels like to try live your life in secrecy?

 

I do

Do you know what it’s like to know you will never be loved?

Do you know what it’s like to only attract lust?

Do you know what it’s like to know you will never be liked?

Do you know that my entire life, people lied, just to be able to satisfy their lust?

 

I do

 

Do you know what it’s like to know you were never wanted from birth, yet ‘’loved’’ because you are her slave, and your Mom can life a happy life and relive her youth through you and all boyfriends and dates who claims to love me even though it is just lust

 

Do you know what it’s like to know you are only ‘’liked’’ for the financial and emotional help you can be?

Only be liked because they lust after you?

Do you know what it’s like to be me?

 

I do

 

 Do you know what it is like to have your heart broken endlessly?

 

I do

 

Do you know what’s it’s like to think of a perfect way to commit suicide daily knowing what the rest of your life will be

 

I do

 

Marriage, engagement, true love, true friendships based on like –I will never experience

Death is imminent, and I pray that the day comes soonest, before I find my own way

 

Do you know how much pain my heart and soul can handle?

 

I do

 

It has reached the limit


Written by

Dlr

eleven_eleven's picture

i really, really like this.

i really, really like this. it seemed to crescendo into a deeper honesty and vulnerability as it went on. thanks for sharing

Dlr's picture

Thank you kindly xx

Thank you for you kind words. It means a lot.


Dlr

allets's picture

42 Years Of A Broken Heart

Wow. That's a long time to hurt. I lost my only daughter, but I never spent a lot of time lamenting it in poetry - anger happened and personal hell for the loss and her not being here where she should be happend, but I don't have 42 years to be in pain that heavy. Look up and outward. Broken is no state of mind to nourish. - slc