maturity

"Growing Pains"

by Jeph Johnson


Many grow up too fast

Even more mature too slowly

Author's Notes/Comments: 

2010, 2017 

 

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tags:

Loss

they are confused,

they thought they knew me

and now they have to face they never did


the things they were not there for

i tried to tell them about

but loving people can often cause blindness


we love deeply

and because we love so deeply

we can hear another's story and shut them out


it happens fast

we do not even realize we do it

and it continues like a cancer in the blinding dark of love


the story goes in our ears

and moves like lightning through our minds

we are unaware of how to help


pain, anger, resentment, denial,

all stages of healing

and grief....


when someone we love is hurt

they are grieving a loss

and it is the same as grieving a death


without being present for these emotions

within ourselves,

we cannot be present for another's


without developing a healthy grieving manner

we can never be there to help 

another help themselves


so now, the pain of not knowing me

knowing i was alone

there comes denial


you were not alone!

(guilt)

god was there!

you asked for it!


blame god then

you always did like seeing him hang on that cross

but don't try to tell me it never happened



3:47 PM 7/5/2013


©



............

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Sing Alone

Stars gather then drift-
Wandering in the endless sea of fascination.
Polishing fellow seekers with their dust of wonder. 
Sparkle-
Adorn, those who are blessed to come in contact.
... Do you see them?
Glisten. 
Craddled in the hands of the solar system.
Have you heard them?
Sadly, these beams go unseen.
For you'd rather glide alone.

I Am Not Afraid

Folder: 
Young Daze

I am not afraid

to become who I ought

to travel through my youth

& teach what I've been taught

 

I am not afraid

to grow wisdom in my eyes

experience in my hair

knowledge in my skin

& greatness in my smile

I am not afraid

 

I am not afraid

to bear what's been born

to save what's been scorn

to love any shape, or

any form

 

I am not afraid

to accept what's been done,

to acknowledge what's be won

or renew what's begun

I am not afraid

 

I am not afraid

to thank the unreachable

to forgive the unthinkable

or teach the unfathomable

 

I am not afraid

to try and then fail

to be defeated, then prevail

to see the beauty in becoming frail

or forget the times i knew so well

 

I am not afraid

 

2005

Author's Notes/Comments: 

An old poem I wrote back in '05. Seems like I wrote more meaningfully back then.

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Adulthood

That difference in result that I expect,
offered from another's intellect,
had showed me it might pay to be insane,
should my repeated actions gather fame.

 

The answer to my self destructive ways,

a question gone unanswered countless days,
Crying to the sowers of this seed,
a burden now with which I have been freed,

 

Freed to be the master of this game,
Freed from the need to complain or pass blame,
Freed from the need to suffer from my pain,
Freed to accept the pavers of this path,
To take the wheel, steer clear of wrath,

 

Chaos and discomfort I shall own,
as tools for the foundation of my home.

The time has come for me to love myself,

and thank the dealer for the cards I'm dealt.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Through the experience of another, I realized in the blink of an eye the root of my self destructive ways. That being a resentment towards my parents for their failure to properly discipline me. The gift I received from this realization is the ability to accept my past; to love, appreciate and respect my parents, and to take charge of my own discipline going forward.

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Simple

If things were simple to get,
would they hold much value...
If love was simple to find,
would we wait or search;
as it comes it goes...
If perfection was attainable
on earth, would it even be
considered...
If living was simple, death
would be much easier to
contemplate...
If an advice was simple to
give, would anyone take
it with an open mind?
If being one's best was not
simple enough, then simply
what is one's best for?
If lying is simple to many,
then it is simple to live a lie...
If being simple was simple,
the world would not care for
simplicity...
If writing was simple, I would
not care to write...

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Life is not simple...

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Age of Revelence

As a wise man, I have learned
from my foolish ways-
In my darkest days,
I found comfort in my loneliness.
In my foolish days, I misbehaved!
Gave into temptation...
awaited sad in the station for
the bus to come-by,
but when the bus came and
rode away, I went
nowhere.
A joy ride of pleasures,
sinful fulfillment-
Innocence lost but gained
maturity, enough to say,
"Foolish practices are wise
learning's."

Author's Notes/Comments: 

I was a fool!

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