Buzzcut Boy

Folder: 
Confessions

It's not you,

It's not me,

It's not him

It's the world that has been

sucking us back in

to the dark void it's yet to fill

devouring our rainbows and

any shade and trace of light

and everything we hold dear

 

It's not you

It's not me

It might be

the words of a madman that

have devoured me piece by piece

ever since

until I suffocate and dissolve

into the nothingness I feel

at 3 a.m.

 

And I'm sorry if you knew this only now.

 

It's not you

It's not him

It's the constant fear

that has built a home

out of the shanties of my heart

Pulling the strings,

the triggers

on its whim

 

And I'm sorry but it's already won the war, I believe

 

It's not you

It's not me

It's not him

It's the inevitability I cannot escape

And so in silence, I shall

roam this world and carry

the memories of us,

your buzzcut and my smile,

and the glow I basked on with

in that April afternoon.

 

Forget about me.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

A poem about how depression affects love.

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allets's picture

Personal Poems

about depression - not a happy subject/ If I wrote of loss and depression and felt it so acutely, how could I write abut love and flowers and the warmth of the sun? Poetry has many forms and formats, but understaning is not place to go seeking a poem - they tend to take on their own lives. I was sailing on how well written it was, and at 68 year's old, I have an old foggy perspective, I guess. young love - long time passing. The highs the lows, sorry, I don't have much time left and prefer politics as an interst and scienc fiction writing. Poetry is just for me, truly those who read it are welcome to come along, but it is all for me. As it should be. - slc


...a

 

ginsywilde's picture

THANK YOU SO MUCH! SORRY FOR THE LATE RESPONSE

Thank you so much for this comment allets! I really appreciate it. It's not an easy one for me to write about mental health but I needed to. I actually am well-versed on politics and international issues. But I post them as prose on my Facebook. I hope we can talk about that topic some other time.

allets's picture

"Inevitability"

Makes the conflict inescapable. Love vs depession - not a good mix. By 2040  the over 70 aged seniors will create a lot of old depressed folks who have their rights removed and their freedom and wealth taken away. Depression will take on monumental proportions and love will not be on their minds believe it. 


...a

 

ginsywilde's picture

That is if they would reach

That is if they would reach 70 years old, though.

This poem is about my own experience. How I let go of someone I love because of my depression. Your premonition of wealth and rights taken away from depressed folks may be right but the poem itself doesn't touch that subject at all believe it.

Morningglory's picture

saw a double rainbow the other day.

Depression is depressing. When do we get to climb out of it completely? It's not you, it's not me, it's not him. I think it might just be the whole system. 

 

We can see rainbows without rain. But rain helps. Maybe so do our tears. 


Copyright © morningglory

ginsywilde's picture

I couldn't agree more! Thank

I couldn't agree more! Thank you for your words. I'm really glad you heartfully understood this poem's message. This one means so much to me.