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There, there in the graveyard was Silence,

No, not Peace, just not Violence.

Anger and Torment had left, but Silence had remained,

For what had happened, only Silence had been gained.

Silence had hung around,

Just hanging there, starring at the ground.

Silence was not old, but was among them now,

Silence was there, tied to the bough.

 December.3.2003

 Trisha Barrek Hopkins

Live your life there is no time for sorrow

Is what I use to tell myself to believe

But then I realized I have little time to borrow

As God will always protect me

So I can live another day

So I can be here tomorrow

So I can live my life free

And each night I pray

To the lord above

To protect those That live so far

To whisper "I'll be okay" to those I love

Because we share the same sky

The same star

Let them know I have a long time before I die

Don't get lazy with yourself

For one day when God wants us

We will eventually have to die

And the angels will lead the way with no fuss

The ones left behind can do nothing but cry

So this I do say

Treat today like there was no tomorrow

Because you never know

When your time may come your way

And that bright warming light

It will show 

Gods angels in sight 

First thing to go is your sight

Then you frightly gasp for air

As forever will be night

And even though you past

People will always reunite and care

Because the feeling is still there 

It will always last 

So when you are here on earth alive

Your goals 

Go for it don't let it pass you by

Because you could be the next to drop

And your unfinished business

It won't get done....right there it'll stop

The things you wished you've done

Your chance for that you'll miss

Because now God with your soul he has won

So before you're a distant memory

In a persons mind

And your name is put on a stone

Treat your life so kind

Be gentle be kind

Love those you secretly love

Before they are left alone

Because you're on your way to God above

Treat today 

With respect

And thank God your alive another day

Because you may no longer be here tomorrow

You just realized that time you had

You no longer can borrow

It's really not that bad

Remember live your life like it's your last

Because before you know it 

You'll end up one day in the past

And a candle will be above your grave lit

Copyright

Abaddon, I can't help it,

I have to look at... At...

The Angel of Death,

Destruction and the end.

Greek Appolyon;

Beautiful Art thee;

Satan and Samael;

Equated with...

Conjuring spells,

For malicious deeds.

Abaddon, Prince

Ruling the Demons that is.

I love Thee pretty sight,

I love Thee enormous might.

Governing powers of evil,

Discord, war, devastation.

Abaddon was once a place,

But is now erased.

A place of destruction,

Region of Gehenna.

Associated with the grave,

The Underworld and Sheol.

Abaddon and Death together,

Merging as One...

King of the Abyss,

The bottomless pit of Hell.

Appolyon, Abaddon;

Pestilence and destruction hence!

2 knives, in each side..
2 eyes burning through my heart..
empty fragments, words drifting in & out of the past
memories turn to ash as we sift them around the palms of our hands..
crippled & gone.. time to move on.
to solidify my dreams..
hate myself.. waste of space, waste of air..
I dove into hell.
God please pull me back together, stitch up these ripped seams..

you're like the blade dragged across my stomach
or the scorching flame against my bare skin...
I want you out of my life
I want you up from under this skin
demons, demons, I can't let you win..
for I am not your kin...

everthing I want, I cannot have.
all that I reach for, I cannot grab..
the rainest of days bring me back to visions i've attempted to smudge out with you..
I guess it was easier on the other end.
but who's to say where & when...

covered in blood, pushed into the mud, I will stand up again.
open scars, out of breath, I must remain relentless.
shadows chasing me, run run, but they consumed all the light..
crouched in fright, nails dug into my back
they're trying to pin down these wings...
hoping i'll never take flight.
using all my energy to break away, fight them off with all my might, all my will...
but they keep whispering "kill... kill.."

legion, you've defiled me,
for you are the fallen, in unity.
this cross lays heavy on my back..
I think i'm starting to crack.
my barriers are thin & I wish I could let God in
but there's just one set of footprints in the sand
no savior to hold my hand
freezing cold.
the ocean looks like a black hole..
if I were to set sail, how could I ever return?
i'd be spun around in circles, triangles, squares
what would I learn?

even though the sun still shines
even though some of the grass is still green
even though there are plenty of trees
I cant stop looking down.. down on me.
the hail is sharp from this dark cloud.
storm hovers above.
I try to clear it out, but I can't with no love

depleted but not empty
awakened in the midst of deep sleep
dead in this life
strife impailed
left hung, waiting to burn..
I never dug my own grave
I only ever cried to be saved.

All hope is lost

Gone forever and a day

There is nothing to be said now

There is nothing left to say

All hope is lost

Buried beneath a grave

All is dead and gone now

There is no one here to save

All hope is lost...

I visited your grave today. It’s been a while, I’m sorry for that. It’s diffiuclt to do so. Memories are hard sometimes. Life has so many twists and turns and things are coming at you from every direction. Sometimes you don’t know what to do and you find solitude in places like a grave. What a great connection. I miss you. We had a long talk you and I. About the kids and why you had to die. I thought of you, tears streaming from my eyes. Happy thoughts of you made me cry. I’m glad I was able to know & love you. You weren’t perfect but you were beautiful. At times I need your direction and your smile, your way of showing affection. I miss you now that you are in another place.

I’ve learned about myself you know. Learned how to take the hard stuff and how to grow. How to find the good in the bad things, the happy in the sad things, the life in the lifeless things… in the things that are gone. Preserving what’s good by persevering through the hard times. How to smile when you don’t want to and how sometimes it seems to make most things feel all right.

Life is a beautiful struggle. I learned this from you. It tries to bend us and break us, mold us and make us but we decide whom we are and what we will be. The choice is ours and we have come so far. I will not break, there is too much at steak here. I choose an existence full of life. You know? Remembering is such a beautiful terrible gift at times. I prefer to find the beauty in it.

We are truly a part of all we have met and all of our experiences. We choose to live every day with purpose. We choose not to waste the time we have on this earth. Much of life is about attitude and choice. I want to feel it… all of it. The good and the bad, the happy and the sad, even the things that make me mad. Happiness I have found here. I’ve learned to love again, and live again.

I visited your grave today. It’s been a while, I’m sorry for that. I’ll try not to wait so long to check in. In my heart I carry you with me and you can rest peacefully knowing its all okay here.

Underneath the scarlet,
Lies a a softer, paler hue,
The simmering seduction,
That you see is fooling you,
That orange glow beneath her gut,
Invites intimidation,
Your morals lying on the floor,
Increase anticipation,
Thoughts begin to wander,
And extend some provocation,
This shallow hold so deeply felt,
Disturbs your meditation,
A guarded stance our spirit holds,
Against this iron mask,
The face of Lady Death seeps through our souls,
Before we ask,
With baited breath we lust to know,
Our fates beyond the grave,
Enthralled into this mystery,
We soon become it's slave,
You hear her tender calls,
And untold sweetness thrills your heart,
Efflorescence underway,
Awakenings seem doomed to stay,
The peacefulness with such allure,
Your open heart meets an open door,
The golden glow of death's first bliss,
Makes love to you with life's last kiss.

© 2013

i suffer right like that 

One rainy day I peered into the window of your soul,

The shattered pieces of your life, like a shroud to fill the hole,

A roomful of confusion, was the story left behind,

A teardrop dons a cheek or two, life's end can be unkind,

This solemn stage is deafening as soldiers come to call,

The pinned lapels are like trophied shelves adorning a blackened wall,

And as I toss the single rose atop the earthen mound,

I toss my sun... My moon... My stars...

My life, into the ground.