Doubt

Sunset Ramblings

I don't like small talk, it's never been one of my strong points. If I want to say something I say it, because what's the point of wasting time on useless topics? If I'm aware of where I stand and what I want, why beat around the bush? I'm talking exactly about this moment, this presentation to you guys. This is a message from my past self, sitting at the comfort of my house and watching the sun go down. I'm saying what I want to say at this moment, and right now, I don't care what you might think. I'm just giving you a ticket into my train of thought. I usually try to be as dierct as I can, but some people can get offended or use that information against you. When you play with all your cards on the table, you can become others' victim. And that's fine, it's something I've managed to deal with after some years of experience. But still, doesn't matter what I am or whom I think I am, I never give someone the whole picture. I can't. Nobody can. We don't even know ourselves completely, what makes you think someone else can? And what's even worse, some people tend to pretend to be someone else. I hate hypocrites, eventhough I know how to be one myself. Ocatavio Paz says that we mexicans, as a culture, in order to defend ourselves, put a mask to hide our true selfs from the rest of the world. And usually that mask is someone that we'd like to be with characteristics we admire. After a while of using it, the mask becomes such a big part of ourselves that we can't separate them anymore. And so the mask becomes you and you become the mask. And I include myself, I think of myself as just one more person trying to take advantage of the situations I'm in. I'm not more special than any of you guys. I try to remember that I can learn something from everyone, eventhough I don't always manage to. Something I've learned through all these years is that people usually don't speak the truth, but they always speak with reason. If you manage to not look at the words and truly grasp the meaning behind them, you're one step ahead in this illusion's game. Everyone can lie, but if they lie it's because they have a reason to. Perhaps everything I've told you up until this point is a lie and you'll never find out the truth. But what you should be thinking about, the real question is, why am I lying to you? 

Author's Notes/Comments: 

These are just some thoughts I had a few days ago, hope some of you can relate

View urdi98's Full Portfolio

No Escape

Folder: 
Self Loathing

I’m alone in a darkened room

Laying curled up on the floor

With silence haunting; heavy clouds

The rain bleeds down, ever more.

                                                  

The cold air slithers round

 Wrapping its eager piercing claws

Around my throat, so tightly bound

Numbing my heart of everything but flaws

 

Tears stream like rivers

Out of my blackened waterfall spouts

Damning the world of happiness

While I’m living in my world of doubt

 

This floor is cracked and jaded

This soul a mirror of what’s felt

Erasing all the good that lay prints

Searching for hidden sunshine to melt

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

doubt.

 

there is something though,

i read up on it

when you pass through the fields

of unbelievable doubt,

a man is there as your shadow

marking hits in his journal

making a shrine of your corpse.

View freewise.'s Full Portfolio

My Foe

Come and go, ebb and flow
fast and slow, time will go

the reality of truth,
will we ever know?

What does it mean, the feeling in  between
the good and the evil

Is there such a thing?
Or is it up to me, just to make believe?

Shakespeare said the worlds a stage,
sometimes I feel the world a plague

If I act a fool, if I act a king
if I take a gun and a sling
if I lose my mind to take a drink
or take a drink to lose my mind

does it matter, once we all die?
or am I just high? Please, can I get high?

In the land of sinners, the brothelsloth is King
coming and going, doing as I please

The more I know, the less I care
the less I care, the more I bear

I bear my soul, so that others may know
the lessons I learned, from life, my foe.

View bdcook88's Full Portfolio

Pretending

So many tears,

Shed along that day.

so many fears,

That will always stay.

Though looking out,

With a smiling face,

I need to shout.

Where joy should be,

There is only doubt.

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Monsters In The Dark

Now listen to what I have to say

For the wicked hide in the shadows of this day

 

You know nothing of what is of me

You may know the color of my eyes

But not of what they are capable to see

 

Now here, I've warned this upon you

For not every smile is ever true

 

Everything is not set in stone

You may say there is an answer

When nothing is completely known

 

Close your eyes, please understand

That what you may rely on is a blood-thirsty hand

 

Unknown of what they truly are

Watch think before you turn and talk

Someone so close to you can be so far

 

So remember before you go on and say

"But why would anyone do this to me anyway?"

 

Human nature can be full of evil and greed

Unwatched, A monster born within the shadows, full only of self pleasure and need.

Anxiety pill

Clocks slow to a crawl time creeps it's deceit 

Some days lack ambition no spring in my seat

Pounding heart sure to cave won't endure it's fatigued

Need mighty endowment strength stability proceed

 

This pen hits the paper racing heart slowly calms

I believe in my words the sweat dries from my palms

Trembling hands quieten be sturdy as steel

I take a deep breath... Now to enjoy how I feel

Shane Aaron

Dec 7 2013

doubt

Folder: 
just notes*

doubt can tear you apart...

that horrible nagging little feeling can kill you,

if you let it get to you....

 

believe me it will eat at your insides till there's nothing left...

but sadness and loneliness...

if you let one voice in...

it's over...

 

 

 

 

View gabz's Full Portfolio

apprehensive

comfortably nestled in between two rocks 

 

above the stillness overlooking the small village

 

flattened black tar rooftops

 

steep cobblestone paved streets

 

winding around the southern tip of the mountain

 

a bicycle ride away

 

too far to touch the bitter memories

 

my gaze is locked into a numbing trance

 

time stands still

 

 

12:49 AM 7/6/2013 ©

 

 

...........

Author's Notes/Comments: 

apprehension