Facade of a clown

Seems I worry for no reason.. I fall asleep wishing for a change of season.. 

so much for surrounding yourself with "people that care" ..  we all need some fucking fresh air.


in matrimony you bled, everything twisted backwards..

you fled, flew away from your mistake..

she hurt you, it's something that can't be erased..

newly wed, lay in bed... with sorrow written all over your face.


was I but your placid escape..? like a rope thrown out to sea, for you who was drowning..

age doesn't matter, because who was counting..?


my thigh hurts now.. at least it's only my fault, & no one else.

funny how when people hurt you, they blame you for it..

& when you hurt them unintentionally, they still place blame.

either way, it's all the same.

so that's why I alone, will be the one to hurt myself.

you just stay the fuck away.

the damage is already done, no need for you to put me down.. i'm not a silly clown..

your laughter brings disgrace... I want to rip out your teeth... 

everything you've said to me won't be tossed to the side so willingly..

but i'll try to forget.. & let God take care of my revenge. 


whatever you've inflicted upon me, will come back to you.. 

you think you're so righteous, so holy.. the one & only...

you think you've crushed me...

silence will be my greatest defense.. a smile will be my shield..

i'll carry a knife, dug within this heart..

& next time you start, i'll dig it right into you.


this battle is far beyond our comprehension.. it's between the angels & demons, God & the devil..

so it might not look like i'm doing anything.. but I have both on my side, both defending me.

because he who knows the war runs deeper then words..

deeper then feeling.. deeper then anything you could possibly see..

will be the one winning. 

the angels know what you've done.. they touch my hand, to re-assure me of their loyalty..

the demons have a chamber for you, down in hell.. you'll be put to work, under a spell..


my fragile existence will not crumble..

this crippled mind will not give in... 

you'll be entranced by the spell of eternal misery...

working to pay back the debts you owe, to those whom you've put down..

criticised, judged... beneath that facade, you're the clown.. 

The days of old

The days of old...
Pass me bye,
Gone and lost, like some kite,
Floating upon high.
And as the ticking continues,
The middle hand shadows its brother,
Old age creeps into your bed,
Like a familiar lover.
In the sea of faces
I am lost, and retreat back into the fold,
One of the many,
Now faceless and un-bold.
Not getting my stardom,
Not gaining the wisdom,
I am the hollow,
A lonely soul,
All one can do is follow,
Wallowing in sorrow,

Now is the days of the new...

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My question

What is life?
Is it your memories of old,
Is it the actions of present,
Or is it the fear of the foretold?

What is age?
Is it the scars on your body,
Is it the winkles of skin,
Or is it the year on your ID?

What is time?
Is it the hands on the clock,
Is it the 4-digit year,
Or is it the thing that doesn't stop?

What is death?
Is it your result of living,
Is it the end,
Or is it your beginning?

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Time & Dreams

Just For Fun

A realm which holds space, matter, life
A giant force that controls everything
The death of nations
The birth of children
The ageing and growing of life
The erosion of the earth
The degradation of society
The reaper of souls
And the house of love, life, youth, and happiness

The only thing that time cannot touch, is dreams
Dreams are time in no time at all
In a dream you can live a lifetime, to wake in 10 minutes
Or live just a moment, to wake up years later
Dreams are emotions
They are desires
They are our will manifested as we want it to be
They are when we play God
They are windows to timelessness
Dreams are where we see the past
Where we clarify the present
And even, where we glimpse the future
Gateways to eternity
Mirrors of our psyches
Doorway to the world

Sweet Dreams

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Age of the sun

Generation of generations, let not your heart be troubled
strive for the bettering of tommorow, fight for the life
you deserve to live; seek to stand tall under the sun
and shine your light for the age to come; bring enlightenment
to the day that is soon to be born.

The Cycle of life and death of the age

Out of the sea, the serpent of many torments
will ascend
and the moon and the sun in suicidal union
will die before the children of this age
but this age is not yet at an end...

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Extinct by design

The Battle Mile

Along the battle mile, lie the casualties of war; lie flesh and machine
on the digital highway; the endless miles of death, where the followers
of the old ways have been pursued and punished. Left in disarray and
driven to near extinction by a war they could not win, a two front war
waged the children of the new age, and those from beyond the horizon,
only a few now remain; lost, scattered, and hunted. The program has been

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Assassins of the digital highway

The Battle Mile

Under the frown of the moon, the hyper bikes scream,
leaving florescent trails in their wake as they race along the old highways,
looking for more dangerous challenges, searching out on
the wastelands for the followers of the old ways, those who live
on the forgotten past; those faceless who still exist in the darkness.
The assassins of steel and fuel lie in wait on the horizon.


The Battle Mile

Outlawed engines of aluminum and steel go to war with direct energy
generators of superior power; beyond speeds beyond the capacity
of the human mind and soul.
They fill the night sky with streaking lights and twisting steel
of the causalities along the wastelands along the battle mile;
who will rise from the chaos, the followers of the old ways
or the sons and daughters of the new age?

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