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  with-in My Heart!

in my heart there lies a thorn way deep down to which no one can see
it torments me all thru the day and i know in my heart it wont set me free
Im living with pain day after day and it settled in and dont wanna depart
so all i can say to you my friend is theres not much left with-in my heart
all around me i see smiling faces never a worry and with out any fears
as i look in the mirror all i can see is the age old pain of my unshed tears
i think to myself what will i do and how will i cope if it never wants to part
all i want is my wish fulfilled and long lasting peace with-in my heart
others say these things will come my way and break thru my dark gray night
and a bright new dawn will push on thru and end my pain and hear my plight
but that day never comes and rescues me so here i am waiting for life to restart
so now i wait for that day to come and take the pain away thats with-in my heart

 

                                                zoeycup 16

To reside in slumber bears weakness in my heart. 

 

I am not yet ready to ascertain the thoughts which dwell deep within my conscious mind, unbearing of the truth that is fortold upon diminishing it's recess, for I tremble as the witness to my own unconscious. It is here that I am forever entranced by the ideas of love and eternity, which inevitably have their own fate within my course of existence. Frequently, I wonder why such a dubious pattern of life emulates in the form that it so deliberately does. Fear lies within the wounds of my tormented soul as I try to reclaim the steps of what I've once known. My life is but a glimse of what lies ahead, a journey I know will beckon the everlasting hardships of the conscious collective. For the reasons of understanding nothing, while believing fully in the ever expanding source of knowledge from which we graze, I cease to acknowedge any bit of certainty that may lay claim to my being. Nothingness is apart of the universal collective, assimilated through light into the realm of the physical, yet transcended from the dominion that fabricates our ascension. At times I begin asking myself the questions of eternity, only to revert back to the darkness encompassing my vision, as I lay still in my bed.

 

Untelling is the way of the mind, and unparalleled is the insanity that it may bear. 

 

A broken glass               

pointed angles all over

giving off its light dimly

Waiting for a trigger.　　　　　

  

The broken glass may be a piece of Diamond　

Creating Aura from its universe

Strength from its nucleus

Fragility in shadow

Silence in clearness

 

Words in color

Beauty in balance

Passion in calm

Reflection from darkness

 

See all these sincerities appear on his surface

just exists for someone to find

 

 

 

 

 

                A mother’s heart!

A mother’s loves is strong and steady a bond from a heart of gold

For nine months she’s carried her child inside a love that will never grow old

The moment the doctor puts her child in her arms she sees a work of art

And nothing in this world will ever compare to that of a mothers heart

She sees her children with eyes that shine as bright as the morning sun

There’s no one quite like her in all the world and her love cannot be undone

She’ll protect her child until her dying breath like she’s done from the very start

A true mother doesn’t have to bare a child to have a mother’s heart

All she needs is to open her heart to let her child in so that he will know

And hand in hand she will walk with her child until he’s had a chance to grow

Only when he is grown and her life on earth is done will she let go and depart

And this to me is how it was meant to be from deep inside a mother’s heart!

 

       Dedicated to mothers everywhere have a fun filled day you all deserve it 

The ancients declared that all is meaningless

A chasing after the wind

 

The modernists claim that nothing is real

A consuming, constant dream

 

So what shall we say on our mortality;

What should we surmise of our souls?

 

We've all been screaming what we want to hear

And yet the truth quietly whispers, drowning our voices

 

We pay our very souls to safely cross the river Styx

Only to find that we can't leave Charon without them

 

We give our all to gain what our hearts desire,

And realize that we have lost everything to gain nothing

 

What man can bring back one second of his life;

Yet time seems worthless without entertainment

 

We campaign to save our fellow man,

By placing funds in already full pockets

 

Humans are dimensional amphibians, living both spirit and body,

The ghost in the machine

 

How light a heart in love!

How heavy a heart in sorrow

 

The weight of a soul drags me down

But hope can keep me alight

 

We strive for goodness through deeds and laws,

But laws are not for good deeds, or good people

 

We cannot live long alone, and yet push others away,

Until we are left with only our “selves”

 

We push and strive to become better than ourselves

Yet we can only grow inside our own nature

 

At what point in our quest to become God

Did we convert into the devil instead?

The Endless Cycle

© 2017 SachikoMochiko

 

 

Every mistake, loss, failure or breakdown…it’s your choice whether or not to suffer from it.

 

 

“I am a human. Just like you and me. I’m young, 13 years of age, but I already feel old. I have learnt that, whatever situation you are in now, it’s temporary. So, enjoy or endure it to the fullest!

 

Whether is another human, your passion or yourself, you fall for it.  This poem I wrote is inspired by both my life and my fellow friends who write with me, sharing their stories. There are many different ways to view this poem. I spent many hours choosing how to structure this and the word choice. I wanted to share this to people who can relate and inspire other writers.”

 

 

 

I’m absolutely sick of falling

 

Falling in love and making the same mistake

 

Eaten by jealousy

 

Thinking that it would work 

 

Even when that person who I sought, 

 

Catches another

 

Thinking that they want you

 

Even if the kindness expressed is just…

 

Them.

 

 

Whenever I fall,

 

And no one sought me

 

I fall into a deep, cold abyss

 

Isolating both heart and body

 

From this rotting world

 

Suffocating me and myself

 

From thinking that I will fall again

 

 

But again, I find peace at the bottom…

 

Sitting just above the bedrock of grief 

 

Where your screams of heart break 

 

Is muted by the sea of tears

 

 

 

But I hunger to fall 

 

To seek for another cradle of arms

 

 

After craving for so long

 

I trick myself

 

That my heart has moved on

 

To someone for me

 

But deep, deep down…

 

I know it is just a mask

 

A mask to cover the disheartening pain

 

And to keep me sane

 

As I walk amongst the beings

 

 

 

It’s an endless cycle…

 

 

 

A cycle that is deemed to run my world

 

My kingdom,

 

My psyche,

 

My crust,

 

Like a wheel with a tempting needle 

 

Waiting to cast me to sleep

 

As it wheels me away to again start the cycle

 

 

 

Even if my consciousness is aware 

 

I shrug it off thinking I’m happily a rolling pebble

 

A rolling pebble that has been dropped

 

Dropped into a saltwater sea of fish

 

Where plenty of fish swim to escape

 

Escape the rotting world above

 

 

 

I’m a pebble after all

 

I was meant to sink to the bottom

 

Or be split in half by the fish

 

 

But as the hundreds and thousands of centuries

 

Wear me down

 

My calloused, guarded heart cracks open

 

As the pressure of the rotting earth

 

I. Become. The. Diamond.

 

It was not long after,

 

I was extracted from the bedrock of grief

 

HEATED…

 

POLISHED…

 

Until the skin of this pebble

 

Peels like those onion that brought tears to my eyes

 

 

Someone has found the brightest part of me

 

Someone has found my beauty

 

Someone has also fallen…like me

 

In a mere emotion with two sides

 

 

Well, congratulations that someone

 

Because you have found a rare one

 

Only one here on this earth

 

My mere gratitude cannot express…

 

Express how undeniably grateful I am

 

===

The two of us creates another;

 

“I’m absolutely sick of falling”,

 

 

 

-SachikoMochiko

“Her Glacier” 

 

Laying down on the shattered glass

I breathe in the shards

Letting the seeping blood drip

 

DRIP...DROP…

 

The ripples resonate and echo,

On the disheartened, crying ice

Eyes… dropping… crystals

Covered my saddened heart

Who, I scream a silent, dry scream,

as if I am in space, underwater

 

To my weeping eyes, “I am sorry for the wasted tears.”

I whisper to the silence, with my vivid vision

The vivid vision blurred by the saltwater tears

Can only see the back of the person I loved

FADE…into the mist of tears

 

The ice that weeps with me, from my ripped feet,

Shatters as I am taken to the abyss…

The very abyss of my own heart

 

I, slowly taken down, down…as I struggle against,

Against the deathly, cold water

As the rose thorns grasp my feet…they take me

To pitch-dark black,

Further…deeper…deeper

To the prison I made myself

 

Here at the ocean floor,

The place that is made out of my own tears

I wait…where the ashes remain

As I hope the pressure of the seven seas

Of my own heart, turns me into diamonds

 

The other part of me, who lives much above me

Where the snow punches your ragged skin,

In the heart of the land of fire and ice,

Awaits, in the concave of a glacier…

 

Aimlessly around the blue glass tsunami,

Breathing in the untainted, crisp cool air

Eyes floating aimlessly

Eyes twinkling endlessly

 

This slow walking giant, taking centuries for each step

Covers the land with its azure ice like a blanket

Treading on the works of any weathering

Glitters with streaks of endless blue…

 

 

O’ the beauty of the blue streaks!

Each a different shade,

Describes the indescribable

His exquisite beauty,

 

Walls as waves and ripples

Of water that has been frozen in time

Forms those very streaks!

Sapphire, Tiffany, Sky, Zaffre, Royal, Navy, Azure and Midnight blue

In bliss…all dancing merrily in this very cave

…an ultimate Eternal Dance

 

She, white light, origin of the viva Earth

Smiles through His crystal

Giving colour and light to His life

Givin’ His form…the Blue Crystal Tsunami.

 

Romance, like lovers, waltzing

even if one of them…will not make it ‘till the end

even if one of them…is slowly killing the other

She, who gives beauty to the giant

I, who lives way below them,

cannot compete…

 

A warm-blooded creature of the land…

It, who decides to wander inside…

runs Its hands on the mosaic of blue

To It, the ice seems to glide

As the twinkling light of the crystal cave winks…

Picturing the two together…

 

Below the glacier " inside the very cave- lays a beach

Crystal…His…Tears

O’ the beach of his tears…when he weeps with me

Slowly melting away

 

Either way,

His blue is much apart from mine,

Sleeplessly, I lay down on the shattered glass

Endlessly, breathing in the stabbing shards

As I accept my fate…way below Him

 

“Him.” “Blue Glass Tsunami” = Vatnajökull glacier cave, Iceland

“The Land of Fire and Ice” = Iceland. Iceland is known to have volcanoes next to glaciers.

“White light, Origin of the viva Earth” “She” = Sun

“Beach of his tears” = A ‘beach’ located in the cave itself. The sand is made out of ‘crystal’.

“A warm-blooded creature of the land” = A person. Human

“Pictures them together” = Takes a picture of the cave with a camera

“Even if one of them…is slowly killing the other” = The sun is melting the ice

“I” = A landform that sunk to the bottom of the sea, just below the cave. (i.e. ‘the third wheel’)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

         “…and here I wait. For her glacier. Who I knew will never come”

I'm walking by a place,

A place that has lost its reason to walk by.

Now I look at it with a somber face and a heavy heart.

I do recall the times i was here,

the joy and cause I had to visit here.

But its not those reasons that make me low.

Not the nostolgiac talks or even the cause of the past that weighs on my soul.

It is the joy of then, and lack of it now that brings me low.

The smiles that were, the smiles that aren't and smiles that could have been

The smiles that could have been.

 

Now instead I walk falsely,

to make light of what weighs heavy.

To make light of what weighs heavy.

I hold my head a little higher, stand a little straighter,

work a little harder; work a little too hard.

Joke a little more, laugh a little louder and smile,

Smile a little too much.

To make light of what weighs heavy at the place I'm walking by.

                     my heart knows 

as i think about you tonight i see our future with your hand in mine 

were all alone on a sandy beach basking in our love with our hearts entwine

as i gaze into your eyes so true i fell in love with you and my heart she glows

just to know you feel it too gives me new hope cause my heart knows 

 i would walk a thousand miles and more just to be with you and never rome

for when im there inside your loving arms i will feel like ive come home

your everything i dreamed you'd be and it is you that i have chose

knowing that you love me too makes me smile cause my heart knows

ive been thinking about you all day and when we first will meet

 that has been enough to exelerate my already fast heart beat

you found me on pof tis true but im the lucky one you chose

 fate has played a hand in this i know cause my heart knows

                             

                         

                              zoeycup