Chaos

The Mess You Left Behind

Folder: 
Poems.

Unsure how to process,

I am living on the edge of forgotteness,

While today, taking out the trash,

Nearly gave me whiplash,

To the past I found myself agazed,

Upon the rough, unforgettable haze,

Containing the choices you have made,

And how I just try my best to wade,

Through the pain,

That left a permanent stain,

And through the disappointment,

That took my enjoyment,

The person that lived in that room,

The one that lacked a broom,

That person was not you,

At least not the one I ever knew,

Having kept that aspect of you separate from my mind,

It was easier to have your role clearly be defined,

But now there's another person that's been along for the ride,

And it takes strength to learn to coincide.

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Hopeless Idiot takes Philadelphia

Confused,

Is how I came to you,

as an 18 year old,

and I imagine it's how I'll leave,

 

I,

hold no grudge,

Because you have taught me,

All there is to teach,

a young man,

 

You,

stood by me,

As choas,

buried my curly head beneath currents,

no one could see,

 

At,

depths noone,

could ever hope to reach,

 

You,

stood agast,

As I stumbled,

ass backward,

Into the stupidest things,

 

I've,

Ever said,

 

to the kindest women,

I'd ever meet,

 

You,

laugh with me, astonished,

As my dull gaze,

tries to make sense of a world,

That is honestly not that fucking complicated,

 

You,

watch my shoulders ache,

my checks flare,

As I internalized the latest,

grave injustice placed upon me (sad),

 

You watch me miss that doctors appointment again.

 

And,

You.

Like everyone else,

Wonder,

Why the hell do I tolerate this idiot?

 

But you do,

And it shatters me with warmth.

 

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In contrasts to your darkness and light is your will to live

Folder: 
Humanity

 

From the coals of sacred texts, brought fouth from ancient whispers of a circle of unbroken time, dipping and acendinding its change state, as the one constant in unending continuity. Therein lies a simple truth, corrupted with gentle persuasion. 

 

The state of being, the being of state and status of beings. 

There are three main laws for us to purview and avail here and now, or in past and future possibility. There is one rule that seperates, yet, reconsiles and is master of all truth; ugly or beautiful it renders life in death, death  into life and life into death. 

 

to live evil live to  - live.d.evil

to Evo L ovE to 

 

The cycle that never alters its identity making Its mood known in all forms and states; the All as in the We collective; and as the I; AGAPI, the known mystery of presiding over both and the first of the third.

 

Go.d  and evil.

 

Live with the hidden truth in plain sight. Felt  with intense realness,  hidden in semantics of languages  long lost and forgotten,  but none is needed to unless seeking to corrupt the incorruptible what is known and fails in explanation.

 

For  this very reason,  the logic of AGAPI (love) in all its moods, colours, ugliness and beauty fail to be described. And still, the poets' pride tries in vain to capture the whole.  Ever so often though, glimpses resonate and we can see a temporal portal with the promise of the indescribable known.

 

Blessingss

Author's Notes/Comments: 

For the few temporal and literal scholars here who might find something of interest here. Blessings and Hugss 

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Into the Depths of Chaos


I slip into an onyx dream
darker than any decaying thing
From the void trying to fill the void
Like Erebus I too am born of Chaos
-unraveling in a mist of dissonance
The silken noose tightens
I am cast into my own Spellhold-
cursed and forgotten
Pain is a welcomed refuge
Lest the 'stars hide their fires'
I will burn into a blacken ember

The hour of silence beckons
Echidna coils her fiery despair
Round and round, over and over
A mother's love- her beautiful poison
And sinks her fangs while
begging for absolution

I sink below the slithering surface
where nighmares wash away the sadness
There is no peaceful passing
She carves her scars into her child's heart
And only with her blessing does she allow any healing

I slip further into the tangled madness
caught on layers of dissension
The steady beating of despair
is slowly creating a new heir
She shows you the horizon
She tells you it is near
Then she swims in self delusion
all while drowning others with her fear

I close my eyes, I open them wide
Inside a sleepless mind, the quiet
is a beautiful lie
Like it or not I have to choose-
To descend further into a watery grave
or tighten the noose 

Author's Notes/Comments: 

**My relationship with my mother can be quite...tumultuous**

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Nothing Lasts Forever

Folder: 
Voodoo

I'm standing on an island
An island of blue
Surrounded by chaos
But caught up in you

 

Storm clouds shaded my desire
Yet, this rocky terrain fuels the fire
I've been lost for so long
Never looking for The Way

 

And now you've found Me
I wasn't looking for you
But something told me
It whispered your name

 

Come on and take My hand
Baby, we can't stay forever
But for a little while we can pretend
Nothing lasts forever
'Cept on this island of blue

 

Dark shades find us
We turn the light and blind them
Voices carry but don't you worry
The sands of time will guide us

 

Here and now
I fight but fall
Win or lose
I only know
Nothing lasts forever
'Cept on this island of blue

 

I look on past the distance
you pull me close and whisper
"I want you so bad it hurts"
And the earth below deserts us

 

Ill fated illusion cast it's net
But, let's forsake this ruin
And find what we've always been wantin'
Because, nothing lasts forever
'Cept on this island
This island of you

Author's Notes/Comments: 

This started as a poem but evolved into a song.

Chaos

Chaos has been dominating,


For the time being,


Inside our loved nation,


Most of citizens are in depression.


 

The ‘present’ does appear,


To be hazy, so is the future,


Forming as the cyclone is the tension,


None exactly knows about the solution.


 

May more selfless we become,


May more humane we become.

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tags:

The storms of life

When the storms of life descend, 

on whom will you depend?

When the gales of life assail,

will you stand or will you fail?

Life is like a hurricane,

bringing wind and rain;

but when it's done, we'll have the sun,

and dance beneath its gaze

 

 

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Life is troublesome. There are always storms and problems, but when they pass, we slice celebrate and be happy, because we still have our lives and eachother

 

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tags:

Peace

Solitude is peace.

 

You don’t have to listen to others.

 

When you’re alone,

 

You can shut out humanity’s corruption.

 

 

 

Nightfall holds no meaning.

 

If you’re at peace, let be.

 

Sunlight holds no meaning.

 

If you’re at peace, let be.

 

 

 

How peaceful it is to be alone.

 

To be alone is to meditate.

 

To meditate is to see truth.

 

To see truth is to be at peace.

 

 

 

You don’t have to listen to others.

 

A family isn’t needed for peace.

 

The light that lives inside,

 

You’ll see it even better when alone.

 

 

 

Reside alone with only the light.

 

With the light by your side,

 

You will feel no loneliness,

 

Only solitude, only peace.

 

 

 

If you seek the light,

 

You won’t find it in people.

 

If you seek the dark,

 

Finding the light will be easy.

 

 

 

If you find the light,

 

You won’t need people.

 

You’ll have the light,

 

And you’ll know peace.

 

 

 

Should you forget about people?

 

No, even though you don’t need them,

 

Remember this,

 

They might need you.

 

 

 

Live for peace.

 

Live knowing death.

 

All life dies, yet lives on.

 

Death comes and peace remains.

 

Author's Notes/Comments: 

I hope people can make some sense of what I was saying. Sometimes I just spill my emotions onto a page and end up not sure if it's even logical.

 

I felt like writing this because in the past few years I've dwelled on the darkness I see in myself and other people - the corruption. I see so much of it that I tend to lose sight of what's good. For a while I dwelled on the darkness and felt content with hatred. I hated the human race. I wanted to watch it die because in my mind everyone, including myself, deserved it. But now I've found peace in solitude and prayer/meditation. Even though I still easily see bad things in myself and other people I've become a little more numb to them. I'm more able to highlight the good things in people. I've done this by turning not to people themselves, but to something higher, much higher. I crave solitude and time alone so that I can reflect on this, and so that I'm not so sickened by the world around me.

Predator

Someones son is dying
right this immediate second of now..
and his General wraps his meaty iron fist
around the all-mighty oil-soaked dollar.
  An apex jungle-predator won't kill
for pleasure or amusement; 
  Even when hopelessly entangled
in the shimmering, dew-wet death
of a spiders web; 
  The spider, knowing it has no use 
for what has surrendered to its entrapment,
releases its prey not out of mercy, or sorrow..
but out of the calm calculus of reason.
  What then of this war? 
To quench the beasts' blood lust
of un-satisfiable desire?
  A revolution is growing silently 
in numbers, behind the backs
turned,
suckling from the tit of self destruction
and greed.
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