Happiness

When will it be my turn

              When will it be my turn?

All my life I've fought to be happy but it's still not within me

When I was young I lost a part of me anyone would agree

Gone with out a trace like those children who never return

Its sad to know but so very true so when will it be my turn

It didn't end there you see when I was wed to that monster

And with his anger came so much pain I wanted to be stronger

But I was not and endured his wild fiery fists oh did they burn

They burned like a fire that rages on oh when will it be my turn

Perhaps it never will and this misery will go on and never cease

Maybe I'm not meant to have everlasting happiness or peace

Perhaps I'm not meant to be happy but maybe i will learn

 and then someday I will know that its finally my turn

 

       Zoeycup

 

 

 

Author's Notes/Comments: 

I was depressed when I write this one 

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Tell me what you see

Folder: 
2017

Sitting here the moments are sped up

and I can fit all of us into broken bottles,

a beautiful saltwater time capsule,

we would glint off the sky like perfect ghosts.

 

Sitting here the moments are slowed down

and I can feel what my laughter sounds like in your head

like yours in mine,

echoing off the air and

we breathe it like we don’t need anything else.

 

Tell me what you see.

 

Good luck,

better smiles,

tears like spending this precious time,

not knowing how much we don’t know,

this is how I love you,

things we wish would never change.

 

If I had these nights again 

I would hit rewind.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Written 7/14/17

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Defenseless

Folder: 
2017

All my life I have been building walls.

 

It’s not like you knocked them down,

I would have heard the impact.

My head stays quiet

 

but one day I turned around

and you had passed through them,

you were standing right next to me.

 

I thought

you could be a ghost

but you’re much too real,

much too warm under my fingers.

 

I thought

you could be a siren

but you thread your fingers through mine

and it is not a turning point, it is a smooth slide.

 

I thought

you could be a mess

but at least you are the one

under my feet.

 

I am holding silver.

 

I will stay here

when your arms extend mine.

I will stay here

when you fall asleep.

I will stay here

when it feels like the only thing I’ve known.

 

I am defenseless.

 

I will stay here

when it is a bad idea.

I will stay here

when it is not for my own good.

I will stay here

when it is too hot to hold your hand,

when it is too cold to set you free.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Written 6/25/17

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Keep Your Silver

Folder: 
2017

I don’t want to fix you,

I want to find a few of the pieces,

slide them till they shine enough for you to want them

and watch the world sit at your fingertips.

 

I will lie here too long,

think too much like always

because I love the sound of your smile

and I want to know what sparks it.

 

I want to miss you

just so I know I can feel more than smoke

I want to hold you

when you think the splatters on your sleeve are worth more than your soul

I want to tell you

keep your silver closer to your tongue.

 

It is locked too deep in a barricade,

it is shelved with the things you want to forget but can’t

or the things you only want to remember on lonely nights,

bring it up

so I can see it when you laugh

so you take what you deserve

so it slides from your lips like a symphony

I am good.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Written 6/2/17

What Could Happen

Folder: 
2017

I know what could happen.

That’s not stopping me from spending all this time.

 

I am not giving up a given amazing for a maybe better,

we might be watching a storm but we don’t know it yet

so I draw the lightning on my skin to remember you by.

 

I am not giving up a now because it could fall south.

I love lying with you too much for that.

 

I know what could happen.

That’s not stopping me from spending all this time.

And if I look back

I might regret the kickstart but I will love all the minutes.

 

I know what could happen.

But I know what’s happening.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Written 5/19/17

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Undone

Folder: 
2017

I’m not through trying to love you.

Don’t make me look too hard to find you.

I slice the horizon and I don’t need a miracle.

 

I hold myself closer when you’re around,

skin shaped like my own sanity

I’ve only started to notice in your eyes.

 

I watch the lights bleed out to these edges and

the sweet starts to taste like truth

as soon as it melts on my tongue.

 

I count silence the same way as the best words,

sometimes I forget about the swords in our pockets.

We might look like hell but we taste like heaven.

 

You undo me, I don’t want to be undone

I want to be stitched, I want to be here.

I want to be so here I fall through the ceiling.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Written 5/17/17

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Living Like This

Folder: 
2017

One glance at the wind outside and I’m there,

chills spread through me straight from my chest

at a summit I thought I would never reach

 

I drench your outline in fireflies

so I can paint it even in the dark,

giving up is only tempting until nothing else is enough

 

Never thought I would be living like this,

wanting to wake up to you more than anything else,

I try to talk to my blessings but they all sound like you

 

You cover the floor so I can’t sit down

Holding myself up till I’m breathing like a hurricane

Something always caught in the tears in my eyes

 

I try to count but I get stuck on your mind

turning all the pieces over when I try to sleep alone

It’s my fault I’m falling and living like this

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Written 5/16/17

Together

Together

By JFarrell

 

Together,

In each others’ arms,

We look up at the moon,

Together.

 

In the darkest indigo

Of a cloudy night

The moon bursts through the clouds

A bright silvery guide, in the sky

Some of the thick cloud is inpenetratable

And makes the moon look like a heart,

My heart, bursting with love for you

 

Can you feel my heart beating?

Can you feel my arms around you?

Can you feel my soft kisses on your neck?

 

Your moon is younger than mine

After all, we are six hours apart,

But, under the moon,

We are both here, now

Together.

 

I so love you.

 

 

Author's Notes/Comments: 

the power of imagination

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Bliss

Folder: 
2017

I want to run like I’ll never reach the ending

I want to dive like I’ll never touch the deep

I want to grow everything I ever lay my hands on

I want to breathe in afternoons spent asleep

 

I want to memorize the patterns that she traces

I want to know us like I’ve never known before

I want to laugh my whole life like this moment

I want to say I’m not scared anymore

 

I want to hold every footprint, every shadow

I want to mess with fate until I’m sure

I want to measure the minutes in her pocket

I want to drink her in like every cure

 

I want to end every day like when I’m with her

I want to swallow all the heavy torture bliss

I want to wrap up all the heartbeats when I kiss her

I want to finish every melody like this

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Written 5/9/17