awe

Breakup of Success

Abandoned and afraid
Scared to death I fade
Exhausted and dejected
Anxiety to be expected

.........................................

Only you know what you’ve done
My heart strings toyed for fun
Convinced you’re worth the fight
I went sleepless night after night

.........................................

Lying to my face
I thought you needed space
****, I was wrong
With him now you’re strong

.........................................

Your decision to leave
But you led me to believe
With my heart full of affection
I believed in a re-connection

.........................................

I was too naive
Blind, she won’t deceive?
But now I see the clues
Just a firework with no fuse

.........................................

Bawling for days
Alone with God I praised
A chance to be redeemed
This is what I always dreamed

.........................................

Slowly I found the sun
Finally, it begun!
A path to become a man
God laid out my plan

.........................................

Engineered to perfection
I detached no more connection
Freedom long at last
Happiness unsurpassed

.........................................

I jostled for position
Ignited with ambition
Friends, family and new dates
My single life awaits

.........................................

A 180 degree transition
Now I’m on a mission
Jubilant life grows on
New beginning, I’m a pawn

.........................................

The spring of the upswing
Soon I’ll be a king
Bitterness in the past
Surprised by this contrast

.........................................

I rose up from the dust
Like a bomb I was combust 
The fire burned inside
Leaping I found my stride 

.........................................

This poem a rendition 
Interpret with conviction
For I have found the way
Forever I will stay

 

A God Girl

I remember the first rain, 

It's warmth and mist and the Autumn-claimed highlands that it fell upon. 

I remember the school of tiny black fish kissing the ripples on the lake's cool surface.

The auburn pines and fallen logs over pathways, dampening stumps and the wind, the wind,

The wind that whispered all around me: "You Are A God, And Peace Is Expensive."

 

I remember the first men, 

Gazing around at their small and perfect world, new thoughts rushing so fast though their minds-

They were breathless. I remember their hot beating hearts as they strove for purpose and comfort.

They found a name for that warm earthy feeling that wraps around two people like warm blankets,

I waited patiently for them to greet me as they did each other, drink with me, laugh with me, 

Yet all they did was pray. 

 

Cement and plastic kill my pure loves.

This hell's imperfections spitting up at me like hot fat in a searing pan.

The sun is too bright for most, so noses are on the grindstone, 

On a project claimed to be far more powerful and prosperous than anything from my feeble craft,

My precious pretty people work too hard, too driven, far too fast. Yet-

 

I can see eyes in flowers, tongues in waterfalls and bony fingers in dark forests. 

I see every being, its lies and truths, its dreams and torments, every beautiful detail, 

As exact as a botanical diagram penned with a flourishing quill. 

I see connections- person to person- like veins knotted in a body,

Synapses and junctions snapping and jumping with all that delicious energy,

All that mystery and awe that I thought propelled all things, 

I give out frugally, yet freely to those who deserve it. My beautiful chosen ones, 

I will show you misty lakes in snowy mountain ranges, streams flooded with river reeds,

Deep valleys- cracks in the earth- stretches of tall exotic wonders stringed with vines,

I will show you that craved feeling of being home that people kill for. I will hand it to you. 

I will cherish you, as your eyes are my eyes and each new sight is my new wonder, 

I will happily give you those dreamlike moments of exhilarating bliss,

And shower you with them from above.

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Candlelit Green

Deep beneath the oily earth gates,

Far away from the icy laps of cold breeze,

Miles apart from the whispering pecks of moving lips,

A grotto fit only for a fish exists in the water.

An ancient citadel of a place, hidden in cool green,

With mossy brick pillars and statues dormant and still,

In small shallows of breathable space, 

Weeds slime and water trickles like pretty music, 

Fresh and clear exists the secret world,

Undiscovered by all but us,

A palace of purity, a castle of crystallized clarity,

We light a candle in the rippling pool,

Hold it up to the dappling rays of seeping sun, 

And pray for more grottoes and glens, 

In which to imagine our perfect world.

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who am i?

 

when all confidence has left you,

and you feel bereft of love,

forsaken by those who claimed they cared,

that's when i'll fit you like a glove.

 

i'll wait behind your neediness,

and use arrogance, he's my friend,

i'll have you projecting all of me 

onto children, women, and men.

 

that's when i do my finest work,

and all of me i'll bring,

when others up and leave you,

i'll infect you, and do my thing.

 

my presence will be cunning,

my manipulation sly,

i'll have you wrapped around me,

you won't even ask yourself why.

 

the more of you i can consume,

the larger we become,

to contaminate all is what i want,

'cause YOUR pain, to me, is FUN!

 

a fiendish scowling wimp, you see,

a psychopath, my dear,

enjoying all your suffering,

your kidnapper...i'm fear.

 

 

 

 

10:07 AM 6/22/2013 ©

Author's Notes/Comments: 

the only thing to ever fear, is fear itself. ~franklin d. roosevelt~

 

and that's the truth.

 

.

Fear's House Of Mirrors

fear is the king 

 

of a coward's delight,

 

fear rules illusions

 

that cloud all fools' sight,

 

fear wants compliance

 

adoration and praise,

 

fear becomes arrogance

 

when you challenge his gaze,

 

turning the tables around 

 

can be bliss,

 

when I make friends with fear

 

his intentions I twist,

 

fear uses everyone

 

and makes them his slaves,

 

fear turns the souls 

 

of some dead in their graves,

 

fear teases weaknesses 

 

of youth and of old,

 

fear changes hearts of warmth

 

into stone cold,

 

fear is the god 

 

that brings glory to killing,

 

fear is the god 

 

that makes the spineless willing,

 

motivation of many is controlled by fear,

 

due to principles twisted,

 

and virtues unclear,

 

many will use fear,

 

unwilling to see,

 

their fears are controlling them

 

clear as can be,

 

if ever you see one who 

 

worries too much,

 

believe it is fear that is

 

gaining their trust,

 

 

fear is a mirror


when we've lost our way,

 

that tells us "forget love, honey...


I'm your hero...please stay?"

 

misguided people fall into fear's rut,

 

they slip and fall in,


losing touch with their gut,

 

banish your worries


and live in the now,

 

To strongarm your fears,


honeybun, this is how!!

 

 

6:57 PM 6/19/2013 ©

 
Author's Notes/Comments: 

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