emotion

MY EVER GLISTENING GEMS

The time we shared and spent together,
Will it ever come back? Never -- forever...

Glistening in the past is every gem,
Only in memories can I gaze at them.

Yesterday a fact, today a dream,
That's how it has always been!

Hope you treasure them as well as me,
Don't cast them in a long-lost sea.

Though you came for a day or two,
I know not how to 'let go' of you.

The games we played on an afternoon,
Will fill my mind's eyes... to ward off gloom.

The daisies I wove for you as wrist-bands,
How can they ever fade from your hands?

Your moods, your smiles, your lark-like banter,
Can I forget? Especially your carefree laughter?

In the vesper bells tolling all those chimes,
I hear the sweet chorus of memorable rhymes.

Who says childhood liking is not love?
To me, you're THE BEST ... even now.

Ah! When we first met, I did not know,
You'd leave me drowned, in such sorrow!

Author's Notes/Comments: 

This is one of my earliest poems written on/about my first love: Daphne John of indelible memory...like all those poems which are kept in between the pages of books, even this was ...found by my daughter while reading "Heidi" today.

Transitory Thoughts

Being on the Internet and (stupidly) choosing to view commentary on any major website will usually result in anger. There’s inevitably going to be someone, somewhere who openly disagrees with everything that you believe in and, chances are, they will somehow be louder, angrier and more obnoxious than every other user that has preceded them. (Louder here means they just post incessantly. If you can actually hear them you may need to adjust your medication).

It’s easy to jump into that anger and engage it. Whether justified or not, EVERYONE assumes that they are right in almost everything that they do. If they don’t, they find arbitrary reasons to justify what they’re doing/saying. Almost no one can openly admit to being in the wrong without an ulterior motive behind the admission (especially on the Internet). But this isn’t necessarily due to selfishness; it’s because of fear. Fear is tied to self-preservation, sure, but it’s more instinctual and less conscious. Anyone who thinks of human beings as anything more than highly advanced animals simply want to believe that we are “special” and “chosen” by a Higher force that everybody is too afraid of trying to explain, because admitting to being unable to understand or prove the existence of that Higher power leaves us open to doubts. What if we’re wrong? What if death truly does spell the end of our awareness? What if we simply cease to be? Will anyone remember us? Are we even WORTH remembering?

I believe that our experiences are all that color our awareness and our morality, which is why almost every single aspect of life is totally subjective. Fear is what drives violence, because fear is what spawns hatred. You don’t feel threatened by someone who is different than you simply because of things that are cosmetic or dogmatic in nature - you feel threatened because they do not conform to the way that you see everything, and are therefore something that could provoke doubt in your mind. You could have been wrong this entire time, about everything, and they are potential proof of that. If you avoid them, or even get rid of them somehow, that doubt will be removed. You can settle back into being “correct” and feel that familiar, ignorant comfort. Ignorance here does not simply mean “racism” or “homophobia”; it translates to a shield you place in front of yourself to stop the many grey areas that life has to offer from affecting you. Is this wrong? Well, the concept of what is “wrong” is subjective too.

To accept an inherent value or truth in ANYTHING is to accept bias. Someone that came and lived before you established a belief, and you accepted it without proof or reasonable doubt. This equates to somebody, somewhere making an assumption; a generalization, and as any intelligent person knows, generalizations are never infallible and always, essentially, incorrect. It helps to think of life as an infinite series of circles and loops. There is no “right” answer for most of life’s biggest questions, and therefore, no end. But people cannot accept this, and I can understand why. It’s frightening. It implies a total lack of control. Logic states that death is the only true end, and not because it provides some sort of solution to all of the conflict and strife we endure at the hands of the world and each other. Its only result is silence without answers. The arguing will cease because we, who are clamoring and banging on about everything and nothing, will no longer be able to do so. We will cease to exist in the manner that we are accustomed. Whether or not our consciousness goes on is just one of those big questions, one which certainly has no answer.

In the end, there is no reasoning that can temper anger completely. Emotion and logic exist as two totally separate lenses through which we view reality. It’s difficult to mix the perspectives that they provide without muddying what might have been the “truth” at one point or another, but still, we persist and try. And as a result, there will never be an end to the conflict we stir amongst ourselves: members of the same species sharing the same ground and seeing the same events unfold before our eyes, but through differing shades and colors that divert us from things that are too bright, too sharp and too full of contrast. We fear the grey because it is at times too mundane, and at other times too complex. Absolutes are the only language that we, as a collective whole, are able to recognize, because they’re easy to understand.

I imagine life will continue as is until we’re all ready to accept a little ambiguity.

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Broken Wings February 10, 2007

Wings of steel,
These broken wings…
Feathers fleeting gracefully
Down the river.

Washed away into the ocean
As time goes on.

The ocean currents,
Splashing onto shore.
The halo’s disappeared.
An angel washed ashore
With broken wings.

With these broken wings,
I shall repair
The angel’s wounds.
Healing the scars of time.

By providing refuge,
These broken wings
Are sure to heal.
(With time, it’ll replace).

As time goes on,
These broken wings
Will sprout new feathers.
A halo’s appeared.
(The guiding light).
Fly Away.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Written after an ex friend got mad at me for not having/booking a ride to celebrate a friend's birthday.

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Behind me

My mask
My shield
My security
My burden

What lays beneath you?
No one knows
Nor ever will
No one but me

Behind you is a monster
Angry
Pain-filled
Scared
Lustful
All the things no one can see

View thelword's Full Portfolio
tags:

Chocolate or Love

I’m looking for a feeling
to consume my soul…my being.
More than happiness or joy or even ecstasy…
my life needs deeper meaning
than those simple words convey.
I need a feeling that will last
longer than one minute…one hour…one day.

It begins in my center…a warmth that will grow and bloom
then spread through my entire body even filling the entire room
in a way that makes me certain everyone can see
this feeling that I thought was inside of me…

But it isn’t…
it’s spreading faster and yet staying inside my body
where it has touched every nerve, every vessel, every vein…
until I feel like if I can’t control it
I just may go insane
But it’s a madness I quite enjoy—
an all encompassing feeling of contentment
better than the smile brought on by a toy
received on Christmas morning that I’d been dying to see under the tree…
what in the world brought on this amazing feeling inside of me?

My lips curve into a soft, slow smile
as my eyes drift slowly closed to better savor the feeling for a while
as the heat that began deep within
sends sparking tingles to my fingers and toes
and right when I think it just has to be peaking
I realize there are no limits to how it grows.

So now that I’ve found this feeling, I will not fight it…
I’ll enjoy it while it’s mine.
I’ll revel in its power…give in to its demands…
enjoy whatever it does to me during the time
I am fortunate enough for its embrace to be
wrapped around my soul…
since this could be the last time I have it…anything could
happen…you never know.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

This one makes me laugh because everyone thinks it's about some REALLY steamy sexual encounter I had.

It's not.

It was inspired by the BEST Chili-infused chocolate I ever tasted in my lift. It LITERALLY sent sparks running through my body...mmmmmm...chocolate....LOL

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Alone After You

Today we became the best of friends
Forgot the past and tied odd ends
You told me what I wanted to hear
You said you loved me and made it clear
Days have gone by and I yearn to hear your voice
After what you've said, you left me no choice
You went far away and left me with zero
Before this and that, you had become my hero
We talked about the past what couldn't be undone
But now that you've gone away it's no longer fun
You had her on the side, always telling me lies
Even after this it's hard to cut the ties
I forgot you once, why is it so hard now?
Come on, it's not like we made a vow
Tomorrow I will hurt waiting for your kiss
But tomorrow will not come, now i know this
What's done is done, you've played into my heart
Little did I know, that was your goal from the start
Here I am, my heart ripped to bits
How is it this easy, for you not to give two shits

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Feel free to comment

View colorme_aquarius's Full Portfolio

Delay

she came into my life through a project team
my emotions went all extreme
she was like some river and I was flowing downstream
and suddenly she all into my dreams

One day I held my nerves and asked her out
She had no clue at all, she was in a doubt
somehow she agreed and finally we were hanging out.
date was fine but I dint expressed my feelings throughout

Seriously, when you are in love with someone its hard to say
she get it all by herself, you can just pray
I should have expressed, should have portray.
made the same mistake the "DELAY"

we entered the friends zone.
adjusting my guitar for the right tone.
but the tune never matched, all songs unheard unknown
she became queen of the bee hive and I was the dead drone

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A GLASS BOTTLE

Folder: 
Freestly's

Like a glass bottle stuck in sea to rise again on the sore of the beach.
Dreams broken and shatterd the glass bottle dont know how long it will take.
Patience is the bottle only escape.
Am i the glass bottle, and need its key to survive life.
The waves flip the glass bottle, but it still dont sink.
It is lock with a top of consitancy plus patience the waves can not breach.
I been toss and turned, brused but yet my strong will and determination kept me.
Im just like that glass bottle lost at sea.
The bottle can have a purpose inside, the same thing i need to survive mankind.
I can be somtime empty, just like the glass bottle but have more room for plenty.
The glass bottle only diffrence from me is that its see- through even when lost at sea.
I cant but that dont mean judge me i am that glass bottle.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

SOMETIMES A OBJECT CAN GIVE US THE HOPE WE NEED. AND PEOPLE WILL JUDGE CAUSE THEY LOST LIKE THE BOTTLE AT SEA BUT THEY DONT HAVE A TOP SO THEY SINK.

View wisdom's Full Portfolio
tags:

Wrong

I feel my skin, my crawling flesh,
A smell so sweet, a touch too soft,
A hand too meagre, a foot too delicate,
A pain deep within, a fire inside,
But hollow and empty, drained to the core.

My heart is wrenching, falling apart,
Cheekbones to bright, a jaw not square,
A voice too sharp, the sound of despair,
Being pulled in all directions, waning to die,
My bones in the wrong order, body curved not flat,
The agony on my chest, the grimace between my legs.

Not being seen right, trying to scream,
Breaking my heart, as they look away,
No attraction, not even existing,
I am one of them, as if they care,
My dominance succumbs me, but my lack of tools declare.

My need screeching, my rejection answering,
Dreaming of pressing our bodies together, mine fitting wrong,
Our hands as one, a connection denied,
A life out of touch, a soul locked away,
Being unwanted, ignored even hated,
Being born in the wrong body, being told not to live.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

A poem about being born into the wrong body.

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