lost

Irrepressible Sadness

I wake up and think about when I had you next to me

I drive and think of when you wanted to come with.

 

I try to work, and remember the fun we had painting together.

I try to shed tears yet my eyes have no moisture left

So I choke from my tear ducts taking moisture from my throat.

 

I go through each day hoping to see you, wanting to hold you

Just wanting to talk, and longing for your touch again.

I need you in my life more than blood to flow through my heart.

 

You promised never to leave

Although from the start I knew you would.

 

I tried to part then, to avoid this pain again.

You stopped me and held me, and said you’d never go.

 

I said that I couldn’t believe that, since I had been so heartbroken before

You promised again, blocking the door

…and I believed you.

 

Swore up and down that you were there to Stay

Even signed it in blood, you would not go away

…and I believed you.

 

Yet where are you now, in my time of need?

Where are you now, as I sit here and bleed?

 

Have you ever really cared?...Will anyone, Can anyone truly care?

For another human being, as the way I have and still do.

 

I dined you and fed you the best that I could,

And wanted to buy you the life of your dreams.

But you wanted more than my life could give.

So you chose to leave me in search of one finer.

 

And now we don’t speak, nor even write words

Because of the choices to remain unheard.

 

Yet try as I might to show you my love,

I have no other option but accepting you leave.

 

You came to my life as an Angel to save.

Yet left me with a dagger still burning in my heart.

In the Darkest of Times

In the darkest of hours,

Light cannot be seen

With these eyes of ours,

Nor by ordinary means.

 

In the darkest of minutes,

Light can be seen inside;

It will guide us through labyrinths.

It is found where our spirit resides.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Just a quick thing I wrote up

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Soul Mate.

They say you're not supposed to look for your soulmate,
Because you'll run into each other on your own, if it's fate, 
I believe I found her once, but I let her push me away,
By the time I realized we were meant to be, it was already, too late,
And for the longest time I hated myself, for not fighting to make her mine,
Instead, now, I watch every day as she dies a little more inside,
She is now completely submerged in darkness, and I once was her light,
Now is blinded by hate, And I can do nothing to give her back her sight,
I try to bring myself to talk to her, but I feel she's already too gone,
I hate myself for not letting her know what she meant to me, for taking so long,
They say if you let your soulmate go, you will never find happiness with another,
And so far it has proved to be true, even though we were never truly together,
Sometimes I can't sleep, my thoughts are always on her,
This is my fault, I let her go, this is my curse,
She is my other half,
And without her, I'm almost positive I will not last,
With her I was finally something,
Now, I will be forever nothing,
I know you will read this eventually, my lost soul mate, and when you do,
You will know that my heart is still yours, my soul is still for you,
You know who you are, I need not speak any names,
Just know that the feelings I have for you,
Will never fucking change.
They say that if you love something, to let it go and if it comes back it was meant to be,
Darling, you have yet to finally come back to me,
And when you do, and we are finally together, at last,
I won't let you slip away again, because you are in fact, my other half.

Lost

Forever it does remind me,
Of an unquenchable thirst,
As I can't drink yet can drown,
And must I, before I burst?
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A Guide Home

Folder: 
Kiss of Honey

In the dark somewhere, looking over my shoulder at the road I have traveled.

If it could be called that, it is a forsaken and troubled path.

There is a light flickering, drawing my attention forward and taking a step toward you.

Caressing the hilts of the Blades, knowing I am leaving the well known for the new unknown.

Guiding me home with our hands held together.  Edging me into the new world.

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My Lost Souls

Folder: 
Wulfman Adventures

I could have folders, journals and g-bytes of mass data containing poetry.

Fail to write some down, speak them on the spot and leave the behind when traveling.

For all my lost poems, I hope to get smart and keep a pocket journal.

So I don't keep creating lost souls.

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No One Around

She's alone in a room

Staring at a wall

No one around

Nothing at all

Thinking of life

How she will live

No one around

Nothing to give

Feeling lost

Needs to forgive

No one comes

Why does she live

Empty mind

Have no soul

Need to resign

To the bottom

In a hole

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Just know when you're lost.

I know your smile is fake.

I see through your lies.

Your eyes are full of hate.

You've lost track of time.

I know you are sad.

I see it everyday.

You've lost what you had.

You never know what to say.

You're scared to get close.

You always say you're fine.

You don't want them to know.

That you'll never be alright.

You think no one understands.

That you'll always be alone.

I know you're reaching for a hand.

Your heart is dark and cold.

Your thoughts have been racing.

You don't know what to do.

You blame all the problems you're facing,

On no one but you.

But it's not your fault,

It never will be.

Just know when you're lost.

You'll always have me.

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The Solemner

I saw you on the train that morning.

You looked so misshapen,

With your superfluous lower lip protruding,

Like the petal of a rose,

Damaged by morning dew.


Your eyes wondered,

Like glass marbles, pouring

Distain into all you knew.


Like a diamond in the rough,

You were there among the grey,

Shaped into nothing but Solemness.


A Solemner.


Lost in the morning,

Of heavy tides and and matchstick lives,

Disappearing completely.


Those eyes, those cheeks,

That imploring gaze,

Made me no Solemner

Then a man could be.


Such beauty,

Pittance,

Wasted through the day,

As it seeps through the drain,

Like water.

Down it falls,

Never to be seen again.


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