boyfriend

Immortal

I don't need to be reminded

      that its all meaningless

I feel the slow hours tick by

      from my already too short life

 

Another breath

Another bottle

Another wasted day gone

 

Fill my lungs with cancer

      And why?

I don't die faster

Fill my gut with liquor    

      The pain doesn't leave

 

Why try when there is no end

I refuse to race without finish

"Everything is meaningless, says the teacher"

Listless at my own apathy

I don't care to care

       I can't 

Because it doesn't matter

 

Why live for life's sake?

Why die to end it?

 

All is without purpose

"Everything is meaningless, says the teacher."

 

Leanan Sidhe

My heart aches

It yearns for my beloved 

A fire long kindled burns within 

 

She is not of the Earth

Her scent is in the wind

Her voice in the rain

 

Oh how I long for her!

 

She is ever before my eyes

When I wake she is beside me

When I sleep she holds my soul

 

I quiver with desire for my mate

 

She is more precious than diamonds

Than mountains of choice silver

Golden is her smile

Seafoam and starlight in her eyes

 

Oh how I yearn for her!

Polaris

Folder: 
Light and Dark

A solitary star

Distant and cold

Amid a universe of shadows

 

It shines alone

Small and white

It glows alight

Clean and bright

On its own tonight

 

Near the horizon

Resting between heaven and earth

War

The dream

Always the same dream 

A sun covered in blood 

Over a field of grey

Lifeless thousands 

Innocents where Death took them

Now waiting for judgement

Waiting to judge

Blackness with a red star

Shining down on the aftermath 

Death has a large appetite 

Its jaws bite down on all

Gnawing on their inanimate bodies

The dying are crying out against it

But their life is but a candle in a breeze

Soon to extinguish

They were but innocents 

Caught in the crossfire

But not I

Too long have I fought this war

Come Hades, come quickly old friend

My time is near 

And I am tired

Take me

Treading Water

What's the purpose in this life of mine
To keep swimming in an ocean without end
The tide pulling me far from shore
They say I'm fine
That I'll survive
But I'm only human
My strength is leaving fast
How long can I stay afloat?
I sink into nothing
A world where I can't breathe
Fire within but water without
Suffocating
Floating
Flying
In poisoned air
Finally a dream come true
A never ending dream
Isn't life beautiful?
It is now...

On Faithfulness

Folder: 
Simple Thoughts

"Don't get so frustrated, 

it's only a book, 

or a few words

that you threw,

 

hoping they might stick.

Sound familiar?

Surreal,

especially if you've stuck with it.

 

Life can be funny like that,

in fact, it is,

that the same things

seem to alwaus happen

 

to people who may wish

it wasn't the case;

assuming it's negative.

Once you give it a second

 

to process,

it's wild to think

the same exact advice

you give

 

is the opposite

of how you live

your own life.

Some advice...

 

Twice now I've had to step in.

To stop the golden desires

of sundrops on skin,

forbidden,

 

when there has already been seeds sown,

a tree has been growing,

and now there's doubt,

the axe lays on its side

 

nearby. Nearly every time,

it can hurt to cry,

but not if infidelity

is the reason why. At least,

 

let's hope 

that's not the case.

I'd hate to see the fallout,

it'd be all over the place."

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Just some thoughts on my ever-increasing number of friends who have yet to reach relationship goals... 

Philosophy of a Life-song

If your life was a song,

what would it sing?

Would it's lyrics edify?

Will it speak of the many people who's 

lives were touched by your existence?

Is it going to show that you stood for something?

Compose a motif that others will want to replicate.

My First Real Love

Folder: 
This Love

 

You came suddenly into my life,

-a most unexpected surprise.

But all at once, my first real love,

was right there, before my eyes.

 

In these many months since then,

I've known love like never before.

Because at last, and finally,

I'm with, my long-lost boy-next-door.

 

You make me feel such amazing things,

I thought I'd buried deep down, away.

Things I felt, I had to forever hide,

Lest they caused my heart to fray.

 

But always, you were there,

tucked into, the memories of my mind.

And always a place, in my heart, you held,

never dreaming you, one day, I'd find.

 

But now that we're finally together,

I'll never again, let you get away from me.

Too many years were wasted for us...

You see, we were always meant to be.

 

 

Author's Notes/Comments: 

For My Gary...my boy-next-door, my heart, my past, my future...my first real love.

I love you, My Sweet Man!

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Miracle

Miracle

You walk in unafraid,

My heartbeat's trailing you,

Both my eyes are on ya,

My breathing can't be slowed,

I hear you in my head,

Can't wait to see you 'gain.

 

Your'e my miracle,

My lovely miracle,

You shine like the stars above,

Listen to me miracle,

You came from God above,

You've answered all my prayers.

 

You're looking my way,

My mind is always on ya,

Oh boy you drive me crazy,

I see you walking towards me,

Nodding your golden head,

Can't wait to see you 'gain.

 

You're my miracle,

My lovely miracle,

You shine like the stars above,

Listen to me miracle,

You came from God above,

You've answered all my prayers.

 

Miracle, my lovely miracle,

Miracle, my lovely miracle,

There are,

Stars in my eyes,

There are,

Words that aren't spoken,

They're are,

Notes that speak my heart.

 

You're my miracle,

My lovely miracle,

You shine like the stars above,

Listen to me miracle,

You came from God above,

You've answered all my prayers.

 

You speak my name,

Your words are always true,

Both your eyes are on me,

My heart is beat, beat, beating,

Your words heat my veins,

Can't wait to see you 'gain.

 

Your'e my miracle,

My lovely miracle,

Can't wait to see you 'gain.

Your'e my miracle,

My lovely miracle,

Can't wait to see you 'gain.

 

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Supposed to be a song, it's one of my personnel favorites.