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Fat kid

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Anger/Society/Issues

Yeah I'm just a fat kid

 

I have to admit that 

I'm just a fat ass

A junkie for junk food

Give me a meal for two

I go to the drive thru

And order the menu

Then I'll order take out

And clean their supply out

 

Cause I'm a really really

Really really

Really really

Fat kid

 

Teen girl: 'Ew, gross! That kid is so fat, he literally makes me want to gag, like seriously, look at how fat that kid is.' 

 

I've got double wide chins

I've got really big tits

But I'm not even a chick

I can't even see my dick

And I'm not even 10 yet

I'm just so damn bloated

I can't sit on the toilet

Without taking a huge shit

 

Cause I'm a really really

Really really

Really really

Fat kid

Yeah I'm just a fat ass fucking kid

 

Kid: 'I'm so fat that when I do jumping jacks people think there's an earthquake happening'

 

 

 

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Finished 2/3/23.

 Ok, my inspiration for this one was definitely Stephen Lynch, if you've never heard of him, I encourage you to look him up. He does stand up comedy, but with songs he writes. I would love it if he could put this to music one day. 

 

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last updated 17 July 2025 - 3:21am
©7 July 2023 - 2:45am — uninvited_1

Ashes, Oh Ashes

Folder: 
Just For Fun
Author's Notes/Comments: 

It started with serious intent, before devolving into comedic sprechstimme. I hope ashes_twisted doesn't take it seriously!

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last updated 10 July 2019 - 11:16pm
©4 May 2019 - 3:26am — Seraphim

NO

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last updated 21 December 2017 - 10:20pm
©21 December 2017 - 10:18pm — randyjohnson

Damn Christmas Bills

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last updated 18 December 2017 - 3:12am
©18 December 2017 - 3:10am — randyjohnson

Boris Johnson as Delboy Trotter

Author's Notes/Comments: 

welcome President Boris Johnson

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©20 June 2017 - 4:14pm — suicideslug

Humor and the R-word

Folder: 
Thought Provocation
Author's Notes/Comments: 

2013 

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last updated 25 January 2017 - 7:35pm
©20 January 2017 - 10:07am — DaddyO

I Am Proud Of My Antarctic Heritage

Folder: 
Humor: Light and Dark
Author's Notes/Comments: 

2013

It was common for kinksters on FetLife who wanted to remain anonymous to list their location as "Antarctica" and their age as high as possible (in the 90s). This practice was most commonly employed by extremely gorgeous webcam models.  This is what inspired this satirical "autobiographical" writing. 

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last updated 25 January 2017 - 7:28pm
©20 January 2017 - 9:44am — DaddyO