illusion

Sitting Hearts

Folder: 
My Everything

We sat like strangers

The largest valley

Between two mountains

A slow deep breath

A back yard alley

A passage of soft hearts

 

Like a flower, bloom

A twisting refining notion

That the foliage within

Never dwindles among men

 

So with the silence; bound

There are countless

Verses unspoken

A slow deep look

A burning mess

A road of genuine hearts

 

Like a flower, bloom

A twisting refining notion

That the foliage within

Never dwindles among men

 

We sat like strangers

The largest illusion

Among the world

A soundless adoration

A grand prelusion

A path of rebel hearts

 

Like a flower, bloom

A twisting refining notion

That the foliage within

Never dwindles among men

 

 

 

 

Mirror

Folder: 
2015

 

 

Sunny spacious green pasture

Cattle graze, downward gaze

 

Bound by firm barbed fences

A rancher ready to cash in

 

Another gaze at the chattel

As one turns to look at me

 

Kindred faces of captivity






View onevoice's Full Portfolio

The Commencement

  Certainly do not want to waste any space
in my precious notebook of chicken scratch
ramblings
ramblings of an incoherent nature
Oh sweet fool of the great lustrous nothing.
nothing better to do of this numbing slumber.
Come...we take to the pen..
on blizzard eve nightfall 
drunken parchment binge 
soak me of this pigmented fluid 
deep into the crooked knotty veins
of this byproduct of our imminent deforestation..
Hypnotic ejaculate of brainwindow 
mouth projector 
pen 
View beatnik1979's Full Portfolio

Pen A Tin Cherry

Have you slipped a cog? 

Do your gears grind? 
Are you not right?
Are you not firing on all cylinders?
Has your Goat been Gotten?
  Was the Sacrificial Lamb of Imagination
on sale for 50 cents a pound that day?
  Was Clarity of Mind picked clean
by the time you reached the rummage
sale of Purpose?
  Has your Train of Thought de-railed
and went over the edge 
hitting every branch of Broken Reason 
on the way down,
only to sink to the Ocean Floor of
un-productivity?
  Did you then make every attempt 
to rebuild that train
with the rusty tools of Mediocrity, 
only to realize what you re-assembled was
the equivalent of stanzas of Mechanical Gibberish?
  Have you stubbed brain-toe
on the wooden leg of the chair of Profound Vision, 
only to visualize foot-in-mouth does not taste 
anywhere as bad as it sounds?
  Have you ever been diagnosed with 
Incontinence of the Mind, which is only any fun
if you've already been diagnosed with 
Diarrhea  of the Mouth? 
Have you been caught forging Checks
of Inspiration and found guilty 
in the Court of Flaw, and sentenced to 
serve time in the Penitentiary  of 
Useless Contemplation? 
Locked away
Bars barricading a 
bleak ramshackle brain.
Prisoner of mind.
Starving.Delerious.Naked.
  and then you hear the sound of a shofar 
A grand vision.
The city limits,
on the cellular level; 
an anthill.
Abandoning the colony 
for a crumb.
View beatnik1979's Full Portfolio

Love Illusion

The illusions created by the hands of love,

Frequently seeming to fit like a glove,

A gentle reminder for us to take heed,

Love is not an emotion, or a romantic need.

 

Love's more like a guide that puts us in our place,

It's alluring illusions wrap it's difficulties in grace,

It whispers for us not to ever be scared,

But to seek from it, balance, 

And then to be shared.

 

It can be confusing, but will never desert,

And not always about one removing their shirt,

When we start closing doors on it's virtues requested,

Our heart becomes cold, and unable to grasp it.

 

If you cannot accept this and try to control,

You'll get just what you for ask, dreams that cannot unfold,

If you shut out it's reality, refusing to see,

You'll get only illusions, nothing in reality.

 

The more that you shut yourself off from life's pain,

Your return will be illusive, with nothing to gain,

But if you embrace it, and accept in whole,

It will fill up your heart, and shelter your soul.

 

When love sends good feelings, it's meaning to say,

"This is my best for you, if you'd like me to stay,

    there is more to this feeling of heavenly bliss,

    that can only get better, but it's not just with a kiss,

    If your wish is for kissing and hugging and sex,

    You will have to accept that your wish is my hex."

 

Love will be shallow or deep as you ask,

Love can be hateful, or abundant...it too can wear a mask,

If you make love a game, it will show you the door,

It's not only for pleasure, it's so, so much more.

 

 

5:50 PM 6/21/2013

 

©

 
View nightlight1220's Full Portfolio

A MIRAGE

 

Life is a mirage
The more you wish to meet it
The quicker it dissappears
As if your senses are bunch of lies

Why then do you chase illusion?
When you know well it's false impression
Which will make you suffer eternal delusion

ThoughtShock: A Manifesto Chapter 17

Folder: 
ThoughtShock

Chapter Seventeen
'As The Echo Fades'
Part; 2

“Step into my shattered world.”

“Listen unto me the voice of chaos, wrecking havoc until all hope is lost. There is no salvation within the mind of the wicked, no redemption for the sickest. Depravity seeps into our moral fiber, where the insanity of it all is the poison to the cure.”

Smoke rose from the revolver as I held it. Standing to my feet I looked down at the lifeless corpse of my twin then towards the empty gun as I tossed it in Sin's lap. I was just about to turn and leave when I stopped once more looking down at the china tray on the table. “What the hell.” I thought as I reached down grabbing a handful of those neon green capsules.

I was roaming the streets at night like a drug fueled junkie. Prowling the back alleyways and hoping fences, I was searching and scouring for answers. I turned a corner and there before me stood a giant beast as its glowing red eyes pierced my soul. I watched in awe as blood dripped from it's massive razor sharp teeth. Why was I not in fear? It charged at me, I heard the shot as the bullet buzzed right by my ear. Driven simply by reaction I jumped to the side as I watched the bullet land perfectly between the beast's eyes. It crashed towards the ground dead on impact as I stood to my feet once more. My eyes moved from the dead creature's body on down the dark alleyway. As if it were not cliche enough, steam rose from the grates that lead to the sewers. Not taking my eyes off the creepy alley I reached down into my pocket producing one of the capsules as I quickly tossed it in my mouth. That is when I heard the footsteps echoing off the buildings as I saw a shadow slowly moving towards me.

“Wash away your guilt with ignorance.
Genocide before your eyes yet still don't believe it.
I want to escape your madness,
preaching peace through war.
Your democracy forged, at the tip of your sword.”

'How far we have fallen from the land of paradise'. As the shadow moved closer I was able to make him out. Once again I was face to face with my own reflection. Only this one introduced himself as Greed. I laughed when I heard this of course as my doppelganger before me was wearing a black suit and tie. His sleek hair neatly combed back and tied off into a ponytail.

“That is a good one” I laughed as I reached into my pocket producing another pill and without a second thought, swallowed it. He simply smiled as he reached into his vest's inner pocket and before I realized what was happening he pulled out the same gun he used only moments before to kill the beast. Pointing it at me he squeezed the trigger with no hesitation. The bullet ripped through my shoulder causing me to fly back a good few feet landing directly on my back. I screamed by sheer reflex, as my body quickly began working on sending the pain impulses to my brain. Grabbing my shoulder I began putting pressure on the wound.
“You know what?” Greed had asked as he walked up towards me, tapping the barrel of the gun against his head. “That was a good one” This time he laughed as he pointed the gun down at me again and squeezed the trigger once more. A loud pop echoed once more throughout the buildings, this bullet tore through my left thigh. Instinctively I had reached down putting my hand over the bloody hole. “What the fuck man!” I shouted up at him as I watched him circle me now like a wolf. “Why.” Was all that I had managed to choke out before the pain seized my voice.
Greed finally stopped circling me, as he only smiled down at me. “Because I can?” He chuckled as he raised the gun once more taking aim, this time at my head.
I thought for sure I was a goner. He had me dead to rights, but luck was with me this night or was it? I had closed my eyes for my final seconds on this planet but when I heard the sounds of more footsteps running towards me I quickly opened my eyes just in time to see the end of a machete slice clean through the head of Greed. I inhaled sharply by the sudden change of events catching me off guard.

Greed's body collapsed to the ground as Lust stood behind him. She was wiping the blood from her machete with a rag as I looked up at her blankly. Shortly after that I remembered that I had been shot, not once but twice. I griped the wounds tight to try and keep the blood loss down. I was slipping in and out of consciousness as fragments of time passed by me. One second Desire was kneeling down over me, the next she was standing talking with Lust. I can remember being moved, lifted by them and someone else as I found myself in the back of a car.

“Don't worry love, we will get you to the hospital” I heard Desire's soft voice as I felt her hands holding rags to my wounds. “Should just let his stupid ass die in the streets.” A strange deep voice boomed over the roar of the car's engine. I was too distracted to care, as I fought with my own clothes reaching for my pocket. “My pocket” I had choked out while pointing at it. Desire calmly reached into my pocket pulling out a small neon green capsule. She held it between her thumb and finger as she looked down at me. “Do you really think now is a good time to be taking these?”

I reached up and snatched it out of her fingers quickly swallowing it as I laid back down in the back seat. “Don't you dare fucking lecture me, bitch.” Lust was having none of it. She slammed her foot down on the breaks as the car came to screeching halt. She turned around in her seat and proceeded to slap me hard across the face. The impact and the loss of blood combined with the pill had caused me to finally black out and lose consciousness. At the same time Lust was verbally lashing out at me for disrespecting her little sister.

'I was sure that this nightmare would be over by now. That I would wake back up in my own bed. As I would chalk it up to bad drugs and cheap horror movies. Had I lost my mind? Was I really just in a coma, in some hospital I never even heard of? That this reality is just an illusion from the another dream? I mean seriously who sees a walking and talking reflection of themselves? Not to mention some kind of giant ravenous wildebeest who just happens to be strolling through the city streets at night. I should have shot myself back at those strange apartments. Oh wait, I did. Only then to get shot by another clone. I am starting to notice a pattern trending, as these pills have me twisted.'

My eyes opened as I stared up at the hospital ceiling. I was numb, no pain. My arms covered by the blankets I slowly moved my hand from my side towards my thigh. I felt the bandage that was covering the bullet wound. It took a little while for my chemically sedated brain to put together that I was still delusional. I quickly shot up from the bed. Sitting there taking my time as I surveyed my surroundings. Lust and Desire were sitting by the window to my room that was next to the door. When I turned my head straight I noticed the television hanging in the corner, it was muted playing some cheesy sitcom.
“Good morning sunshine.” A strange voice boomed over the whispers and giggles of the women. I let out a soft sigh as I knew my 'peace' was over. The morphine pumping into my body is powerful but not as strong as I knew the let down of the figure behind this voice. Deep down I knew it was another clone, but who this time? Another emotion? Perhaps this time it's Humility or just maybe Gluttony. Yeah that would be appropriate.
“If you are wondering” He said as he slowly stood up from the chair that was hiding off in the shadows. “I am Envy” He spoke slowly walking towards me. Yup another doppelganger, wearing my face. He placed his hand on the railing of my bed as he walked, his fingers were covered in rings. Platinum, gold, gems, and obviously over compensating for something. He turned his head towards the girls. “Would you lovely ladies, give me and my friend here a moment?”

They looked at each other then back towards Envy. Giggling as they stood up and casually or more so flauntingly exited out the door, closing it behind them.
As soon as they left the room he turned his head back towards me only to see my hand lash out at him. I wrapped my fingers tightly around his skinny neck. My skinny neck. Doped out I still managed to find the strength to bring him down as he fell on my bed, giving me extra leverage over him as he choked and started struggling. “How many more of you motherfuckers am I going to have to kill!” I shouted at him. Fury behind my eyes as I just wanted to see this abomination dead.
He desperately lashed out, then reached over grabbing my thigh pressing his thumb deep into my wound causing the stitches to tear. I screamed out in pain that the morphine could not kill, as I instinctively let go of his neck reaching for my leg. Envy dropped like a sack of potatoes to the floor beside my bed as he gasped for air.
“I came to warn you dickhead!” he tried shouting out as he rubbed his neck still panting heavily. “There is someone big, on his way to see you.” He climbed to his feet using the bed as a prop. Once to his feet he decided to take the opportunity of having the advantage over me as he punched me hard in the jaw causing me to fly out of the bed landing on the floor myself.
Stretching as he made his way around the bed to where I was laying on the floor. “I was just gonna give you the message, and then be on my way.” I got on my right knee trying to keep pressure off my left, when he suddenly without warning kicked me hard in the gut causing me to flip over on my back. I held my shoulder as I grunted in pain.
“So what, now you decide to kick my ass?” Giving him a shitty grin to hide the fact that I was indeed scared. I had no tactical advantage here. Envy laughed as he climbed on top of me, grabbing the front of my hospital gown pulling me up closer to him. I could see his eyes clear as day now hallow and empty. He whispered into my ear before he proceeded to use my face as his punching bag. “What makes you so special to get the girls?” He stopped hitting me after about the tenth time. His fist was covered in my blood but it was what I did next that not only caught him off guard but myself as well. He did not know what to make of me when I started laughing at him.

“Why are you laughing?” He proceeded to shake me in his frustration. “You are beating the shit out of me because you are jealous that I have two smoking hot bitches at my side? You are a moron.” I chuckled as I turned my head to the side spitting out the blood that started pooling in my mouth then turning my head back towards my assailant. “Look you can have them if you think you can get them, I don't own them. Hell I am starting to think they are nothing but trouble anyway.” This actually pissed him off even more as he decided that my face was not messed up enough, he went to town once more. My eyes closed as I heard bones snapping in my ears and I could actually remember feeling the blood running down my ears.

It was quiet now. I had blacked out from the beating I had received. Hell have no fury like your own envy. I could hear footsteps and whispers around me. My eyes were swollen but I opened them. Everything was out of focus, blurry as I managed to see shadows and blobs. Two figures were pacing back and forth at the foot of my bed.
I groaned as I turned my head, the pain was almost unbearable. My eyes started focusing, I could make out the dead body of my alter ego. Envy laid headless on the floor as I heard Lust's voice break the still air. “Sleeping beauty wakes” They both made their way over to my bed each sitting on opposite sides of the bed. I could feel Desire's soft hands touching gently at my face. “Your handy work I take it Lust?” Turning my head just a bit towards the direction of the decapitated clone on the floor. “So you would rather me let him turn your face into ground hamburger?” She smirked as she stood up stretching. She grabbed her jacket from the back of the chair, she carefully stepped over the corpse. “I'm going to run down to the cafeteria, see if I can't get us anything to eat sis.” She walked over to her sister leaning down kissing her. It was when she held the kiss that threw off the first flag in my head. Lust disappeared out the door once again closing it behind her. When I heard the door lock the second red flag shot off. Much like before, I was locked in the room with Desire. Who like before wasted no time before she spun around and carefully climbed on top of me. Easing herself down, she carefully straddled me as to not bump the wounds. I could see the devil herself grinning down at me. What fate was I sealed to now?

Author's Notes/Comments: 

ThoughtShock: A Manifesto Chapter 17 "As The Echo Fades"

Well I know in my first post, I said this was only a two part short story. I found while writing it however that was just not the case. The deeper I dove into this piece the more I was compelled to express. So I have decided to make this short story a three parter!! So stay tuned for the next installment of "As the echo fades"

hmmm I wonder though, how would someone even prolouge this short story its just full of craziness!! hahaha

View matthewwayne's Full Portfolio

ThoughtShock: A Manifesto Chapter 16

Folder: 
ThoughtShock

Chapter Sixteen
'As The Echo Fades'
Part; 1

“It's the bittersweet taste of defeat”

She gracefully walked towards me after entering into the room. She came bearing gifts. It was a peace offering from the fallout from the night before. She offered up a cocktail of tasty treats for me to take my pick from. Setting it before me, the china tray used to carry the rainbow platter. I swear it must have came straight from 'George Jung's' own private stash. She smiled coyly at me as she straightened her posture. Lust's eyes trailed up and down my body as I sat back in the chair. “If I had not known any better.” I thought as I glanced around the room catching a glimpse of Lust's little sister, Desire giving me a rather creepy wink.

As if this whole entire experience could not get any more strange. In walks Sin. Slowly he makes his way to the table taking a seat straight across from me. I am at a loss for words, my mind spinning with disbelief, unable to formulate a single coherent thought. Now sitting before me, like staring into a mirror was the very reflection of myself. He began to pick at the China tray sitting on the table. Sorting, separating, the goodies. It was a bad acid trip, yet I am the only one here who has not been taking from the candy jar. “How” would be the last rational thought to cross my mind this night.

My doppelganger looked up from the tray and in short simple words. 'Are you ready?' Identical to my own voice. All I could do to respond was slowly nod my head up and down. That is when he reached out towards me and in his fingers rested a small neon green capsule.
“Was I dead already?” As I took the pill from my clone before me. Once it was in my possession, Sin stood to his feet. Clapping his hands together, without warning causing me to jump in my seat.

I held the pill gently between my thumb and forefinger. Unsure of which bothered me the most, this strange cocktail in my hand or the fact I was seeing myself in a third person. “Had I lost my mind already?” I watched as Sin walked towards the women, leaning down to whisper into both Lust and Desire as they each started grinning.
“What the hell”. Was the thought to cross my mind as I chugged the neon green capsule down my gullet. 'We play the role of the fool' The affects were almost instant. My eye lids grew heavy, struggling to keep them open, to remain focused. It was then that I saw it {that void beyond my own eyes}.

I stirred about under the warm covers as sweat beaded down my face. The sheets were soaked as I shot up awake in a violent burst. As my eyes began to focus it was then that I had noticed Desire sitting on the edge of the bed. She was quiet, and she was ever so beautiful. It was that 'elusive' beauty she masterfully obtained. That dream you can feel only just cannot reach for, with a hint of innocents behind those cruel eyes.
“What had I taken”? I managed to choke out from the desert that was my mouth. Before she could reply the door of the bedroom bursts open as Lust storms in. Fury behind her eyes as she snatched up Desire from the bed. Jumping to my feet, I was quickly stopped by my doppelganger who happened to enter into the room behind Lust. Only since being this close I managed to make out a few differences. His face was aged far more than my own. The life or hope in my reflection's eyes was almost gone, a fading gleam. Was this me? Was this to be me? No rational thought could cross my mind.

Just as I was about to confront this 'Sin', the lights in the room flickered for a moment, seconds later they went out completely. It was then that I heard a strange voice whispering in my ear yet nobody was close enough to me, I felt no breath on my neck, no body close to my own. Just the whispers as I could not even make out what it was even saying. As the door opened once more revealing a little light, I followed as Sin, Lust, and Desire made their way out of the room, holding my head.


“I am not insane.”
“I am not insane.”
“I am not insane.”

“I am losing my fucking mind”.
Once out in the hallway, I quickly dashed for the emergency stairs and it happened just as I heard the girls call out my name. My footing gave way, the step itself shifted. Congealed by my own contact. Tumbling down the massive steps as each one reconfigured itself as I landed onto it. Finally hitting a small landing way, sliding to the wall causing me to stop.
Lust and Desire quickly ran towards me, checking to make sure I was not seriously injured. I struggled to remain conscious as the pain in my head grew worse and worse. Looking around trying to focus. My eyes locked in the eyes of Desire and for a split second, I had felt a sense of sadness. I laid my head back down on the cold floor waiting for the darkness to come, to wash over me. Deep down I felt like I deserved to meet my reaper.


~*~

I have dreamed, I have manifested.

“One. Click, Click.
Two. Click, Click.
Three. Click, Click, Snap!”

I wont beg for your forgiveness.
On my knees, I must have asked for this.
My suicidal mission, becoming my final inscription.

“Four. Five. Six.
Just. One. More. Click.
Then my reaper will no longer wait,
my soul he will get to take.
Death fills the air this night,
Playing in the shadows
of what is wrong, what is right.”
~*~

I woke in a small room. Different then the last. The moldy wallpaper was torn in several places. Patched over holes as few candles illuminated the dark corners of the room. Lust looked up from her book as she lounged in a cheap foldout chair. She was wearing a see through purple gown, a tease for it revealed more for the imagination then anything.
She stretched in the chair as she closed her book laying it over her stomach. Watching as the hem of her gown rose slowly up her smooth legs. She spun in her chair facing me, putting her hand between her legs as the palm of her hand placed firmly on the seat of the chair. I quickly blinked and focused back towards her eyes as she was now grinning at me. “Whats the matter my dear?” her voice was seductive, she was preying on my weakness.

“Did you hear the whispers?” My voice was a bit shaky as I watched her slowly sway her legs from side to side. She stopped only long enough to give me a weird look. “Here, these will help you relax.” She had handed me two more of those neon green capsules. Reaching around to the other side of the chair she grabbed a water bottle. Also handing it to me.
“What are these?” I asked as I rolled one of the capsules between my finger and thumb. Lust quietly laughed to herself as she slowly stood to her feet. Leaning in she softly whispered into my ear, feeling her warm breath on my neck as she spoke. “It my love, is whatever you wish it to be.” With that she stood back up, turning towards the door she gracefully made her way to it swaying her hips in the process. She stopped when she had made it to the door “I will send Desire up in a little bit to check on you.” Her voice was calm, and soothing yet it felt like she was hiding something. Turning around she disappeared out the door closing it behind her. Then I heard it, the deadbolt latched form the other side.

I laid down in the old bed, with sheets that seemed to have not been used in years. As I took note of the room once more, I noticed old pictures hanging from the walls. Taking a deep breath and placed both capsules on my tongue, closing my mouth I quickly swallowed. It did not take long before my eyes started to feel heavy. My body becoming more and more relaxed, I started drifting in and out of sleep. I could remember hearing the latch on the door being unlocked.

I heard the creaking of the door as it opened and closed. Then once more it was locked. I could not muster up the desire to get up and see who it was. I remember hearing the soft footsteps as they got closer and closer to my bed. I could also remember the scent of distant roses, only I could not find motivation to turn my head. I just laid there as she slowly climbed into bed with me. When her skin made contact with mine, it sent an electrical shock through my entire system. She carefully straddled me as I felt her warm breath on my lips.
As I opened my eyes, Desire had placed her lips to mine as she kissed me deeply. Feeling her tongue dance about with my own. Her hands found their way to my head as she entangled her fingers within my hair. Slowly she lifted herself up only come back down grinding herself into me and every second that passed the more I could not fight her charms, her seduction. I gave in as I reached up for her. I was going to set claim to Desire.
In my distraction I was not aware that Lust was standing off in the shadows, watching and plotting. What plan was she conjuring up? I would never know, for my thoughts and intentions were lost to that of Sin's.

When I woke from my groggy state I was not even sure exactly what had happened. My clothes were thrown about the small room and on the pillow next to my head laid a black rose. Desire had left me that night. No words were ever exchanged, just that rose as the black petals spoke the story itself.
I made my way to the main living room. There was no one, just another trashed room. In the middle of the room sat the table and two chairs, on the table rested the china tray and on the tray was a gun along with an assortment of different types of pills.

Sitting down in one of the chairs, I slowly reached out and picked up the gun staring at the narcotics on the tray. “Go on.” I jumped, startled from the sudden voice. Sitting straight across from me was none other than Sin. He was smiling, more like a wicked grin as he spoke again “Pull the trigger” He reached over towards the tray picking up a pill, popping it into his mouth. Chewing it with a smug grin as he continued “Go on, we both know it's what you want.”
Without thinking I lifted the gun, pointed it directly at Sin and pulled the trigger. “As the echo fades, I am left just to decay.”

Author's Notes/Comments: 

ThoughtShock Chapter 16 "As the Echo Fades"

This is a Two part series, a creative short story based on a very sensitive topic for me. I have been battling a few addictions off and on for well over ten years and everytime I try and write about it or any "addiction" really for that matter weather it is just a poem or even a creative piece they all seem to fall short, I can never truly capture that muse and I fear I may never will for I find it extremly hard to glorify something so destructive. Anyway This is chapter 16, part two will be chapter 17 and I do hope you enjoy, please let me know what you think.

View matthewwayne's Full Portfolio

ThoughtShock: A Manifesto Chapter 15

Folder: 
ThoughtShock

Chapter Fifteen
'A Personal Conversation'

Matthew Wayne

By the grace of the divine. Felt deceived when I ran out of time. So much I wanted to say but kept it sealed and locked away. Who could I fool? The demons wanted out to play. I close my eyes and search for any reason why I should remain sane.
Fear rules over our minds controlling our hearts.
No longer do we trust our neighbors, brother or sister. Can no longer trust myself when deep down there brews something sinister. Locking ourselves behind closed doors to decay even faster. It is a choice to remain ignorant. A sense of security within that bliss. Waking from that dream into this nightmare with just one kiss, while you reach out for anyone who might be there. The illusion is fading does anyone even care? Trust is now a fable, a whisper across the table.

“Breaking the bread as piece by piece
gets passed down the line. Hungry mouths,
with all the starving faces
where the chaos brings in the tease.”

As is above, so it is below
now follow me as I know you are just a little slow.
What is out there, is also found within
and this ride is just about to begin.

The Dead Poet

Just how far are you willing to take this?
Destroying your soul, standing before your own abyss.
Simply close your eyes, now make your wish.

“In this illusion is there really such a thing as luck?”

In the war zone I shall die,
glory to be had on the battlefield as I fall
there is power in truth, victory over the lie.
A child once in fear, now we all stand tall.

Damien Nosferatu

You are caught within a web built from their lies. It is the circle of life as you struggle just to survive but everything eventually dies. We are creatures of habit where we allow our emotions to run rabid. We are a disease as we spread, devouring everything that is in eye sight. As this theater of life plays on in our head. We suffer with your ignorance to the plight where you gave up before the war started. Shit got hard so you simply departed. Afraid and unsure, so now the whole experience is nothing but a blur.

“Walking this dream as you wake to its lies.
Dare not speak out for fear of the reprise.
Are we dead, or are we alive?
Could it be an illusion all in my head?”

“The dead will tell no tales.
Written in blood, it will be our journey through the nine hells.
The past it will be our future, the future is our past
it seems to be a concept no one can grasp.”

The Dead Poet

“Where am I to go from here?
Where I no longer recognize my own reflection in the mirror.”

I find myself often repeating the same mistakes over and over again, as if I had forgotten the lesson. The same trials will soon begin. I will fight against the current, my goal will be to survive the irony. To numb the pain and to be free. Once more within the throws of addiction. Drawn to this vice for a reason. I search for an escape from this vary reality that you help manifest, that you create. Slowly over time it transforms into a security line. Days and weeks blend merging as one. The world I had built around myself begins to melt. The deed has been done. I will slowly wake to a world that no longer feels real. I bartered with the devil and signed the deal.

Damien Nosferatu

“shhhhhh.......
I have a secret to share,
it is not a pretty white lie,
it will make your faith run dry.
For I wanna die like Jesus Christ.
Be the martyr for your ultimate heist.”

I have witnessed hell with my own eye.
I have sat alone in the dark wishing to die.
I have whispered a forgotten name.
I have even played this forsaken game.

Pounding my fists against my skull.
Russian roulette with my own soul.
The devil said I could not be saved,
reserved me a seat in hell next to the depraved.
This is my reality, not just any illusion
questioning my sanity, by the barrel of this gun.
Question everything, for I speak in tongues.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

While writing up this chapter and the chapter before this, the odd thought had crossed my mind. ThoughtShock for the title of this book is perfect, for people only "Thought" I was crazy and insane. Bwhahahahahaha I do hope you enjoy this creative piece.

Okay a little history about this piece..
"Damien Nosferatu" and "The Dead Poet" are names I've pinned to two different creative styles I tap into. My "voice" as it were. So I just call them basicly my different writing personalities. One night I thought how 'odd' it would be if these personas had a conversation per say. How strange would a piece be if I could compile a readable piece from these two styles, I can see the difference however curiosity has me wondering if anyone else can see a difference in the personas. I am also thinking of doing another project like this again, it was quite fun.

View matthewwayne's Full Portfolio