*
ANODYNE
Animals on whom
people dine..
all died without
an anodyne.
*
GOLDILOCKS AND THE 3 BEARS
A young woman married
a man who shortly after
went on a week long trip with
his male friends.
After his return,
She went down to the basement
and was shocked to see
three bears' dead bodies in the process
of being skinned,
hanging from the ceiling.
Running screaming upstairs,
she inadvertently sparked
rage in her inebriated
hunter mate,
who threw
her down the steps,
breaking both arms.
The next day when he
went to work,
the wiser Goldilocks
replaced the old
with new gold locks.
*
OHIO STATE TEACHING STUDENTS CRUELTY
A drunk, long before I found alcohol
By jfarrell
Used to watch my dad come home from the pub
And beat his wife and kids
Used to see my mum plied with drink
To walk out with a man and humiliate all of us,
Humiliate me, again
When we got taken into Care,
I didn’t know alcohol was involved
(found that out recently)
But, at least that first time drunk
Scared me back into being teetotal
I found alcohol at 25 and fell in love with being inebriated.
Up til then, I’d always had a ‘drink problem’
though teetotal,
Fear that one taste I’d end up like them
Fear I’d become him
Maybe I’m not far off him, not that different,
I have no wife or kids, so don’t know if I’d hurt them
Maybe I’m just as blind to how alcohol changes me
As he was blind. That’s why
I was a drunk, long before I found alcohol.
Family Truths
By jfarrell
It was addressed to me; it’s my 6th birthday;
Dad’s gonna open it… well, why not? Who do I know at 6?
Little white envelope with a stamp;
I’m chuffed I can read my name…
And someone sent me something, on my birthday.
There was a letter and some polaroid photographs;
1973, the height of technology :-)
Dad read the letter, looked at the photos
And went to the pub.
I didn’t think any more of it.
About 6 hours later…
“Tell me what you did!” whack!
“Tell me the truth you little……” thump!
“Tell me about these….” as he throws some bits of card in front of me.
I blacked out, somewhere there.
And awoke face down in kitchen sink
With hot water being poured over my head;
I couldn’t work out why all the water was red.
“Tell me about these!”
‘These’ being polaroid photographs of my being raped that Summer.
Turns out, ‘Uncle Brian’ had sent a similar letter and photos
To my cousin’s parents; he groomed and raped us together;
They went back to Ireland and I know nothing else about him, them;
For me, dad had to beat the ‘gayness’ out of me;
And Uncle Peter still blames me for ruining his marriage.
And I still feel like a frightened 6 year old
With no idea of what’s going on.
We've been drifting apart
Broken path, broken heart
You kept saying we'd find each other
That was until you found another
As if this was a game to you
As if you thrived on my pain, too
A different day, and I could have died
But luckily enough, fate saved my life
You see, I knew you were crazy
Scarlet cheeks, eyes hazy
But no one else believed me
Until they saw me take the beating
We're you smiling as you tore me up?
I couldn't see, my eyes swollen shut
A punch to my face
With uncanny grace
But I figured otherwise
You granted your despise
Out of control and unrelenting
I took the blows and fiery venting
But you wanted more from this
One last, passionate kiss
Your lips tasted of liquor
And it made me feel sicker
To feel your lips against mine
The disgusting taste of fermented wine
But I took it all cause I felt your pain
Knew what it was like to live in vain
The way it feels to walk in shame
When all is lost and you're to blame
She sleeps with secrets, pain and shame,
And all her emotions feel the same
She don’t even answer to her own name
She says ’’ just call me a statistic babe’’
Says I could die so easily
Just give up ever so quietly,
I’ve sold my freedom
my mind
my air.
Send this letter to my parents’
If they even care
It reads-
''Threw away my future
Dumped it like a stolen car
Now I’m chasing down shots in a dirty bar
When my old life just seems too far
Too far to go back to and too far to regain
Now I look at my world
And know everything has changed''
My memories, are like concave feelings.
Barely there, just moments, fleeting.
As though it happend to somebody else,
As though I had worn another one’s face.
You stole my pride, my love, my life.
So I promised that never again, shall I.
Be broken, bitten, punched or shoved.
But now I find myself, too empty to love.
I feel like being a prisoner,
Inside my own house here,
He doesn’t give me a handful of freedom,
All he gifts me with is boredom and boredom.
If I call anyone over the phone,
He appears like a monster making me mourn,
For my effort to contact with others,
Even the windows are like the jail’s bars.
I can’t cook properly, he says,
I can’t behave, he says,
I’m not allowed to go for a walk outside,
Since the virus called ‘doubt’ is eating his mind.
He has made me bleed repeatedly,
Since I tried to escape desperately,
Grabbed me like an animal,
Throwing me back into his torture cell!
Oh God! What can I do?
I beg of You,
Please save me from this medieval Satan,
Open up a way for me to fly, to run.
I am a powerless pawn
In a dangerous game
I am only a victim,
With no reason or name
I am his captive
He holds my fate
My future looks bleak
As he closes the gate
No one can see this
No one but me
My bonds are invisible
They think I am free
But loving him
Is not a choice
It’s demand on my heart
It strangles my voice
I live in terror
I fear the worst
And although he assures me
That I’ll never be hurt
I don’t believe him
He’s said this before
Once I had faith
But I don’t anymore
I'll walk away.
Just like you did.
Just like you did,
Before you came back
And begged for forgiveness.
I look at you
A pathetic disappointment.
I can't believe
That I was so easily fooled.
You told me that the whole world would become mine.
You told me
That I would be happy.
Am I happy?
Do I look happy?
I have shed blood and tears
Because of you.
The nights when you come home
Drunk and wasted
Are the times where I fear for my life.
I shouldn't be fearing
From you.
You're supposed to be the person
That I come to when scared.
Yet
For you me.
You are fear itself.
I want out.
I don't want to be with someone
Who enjoys
Hurting the people around him.
The crack of your belt
Is a sound that I have become
Accustomed to.
Beware,
The day you look away,
I'll run away.
Escape from this nightmare.
You'll be sorry,
For everything you've done to me.
I'll keep the scars
You've given to me.
To remind me
Of what happened to me.
And to remind me
Of what a stupid idea you were.
Don't look for me.
You won't find me.