Unrequited Love

Almost Forever

Folder: 
Letters To Andy

I cannot say forever,
Since I haven't dealt
with tomorrow.
So, it's been too long,
Too unbearable
That I haven't seen you
In almost forever.
And after tomorrow,
I'll say I know what
Forever
Feels like,
But the next day is
inevitable.
The pain is also
Inevitable;
My heart cannot withhold
The screams for help,
Because heartbreak hurts
For almost forever.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Just another Letter for Andy. I haven't seen him in far too long. And I have no idea when, or if I'll see him again.

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Waiting

Every morning as the sun does rise
I wish I could look deep in your eyes
to tell you how much you mean to me
to have you here where you should be
I wish you had never gone away
that you had known just how to stay
but you left me here all alone
in a hollowed out version of our home

The battle you wage within your mind
is one you’ve fought alone for too much time
when will you learn to lay down your gun
and open your heart to the only one
who can heal your past pain, help you to see
just what a magnificent man you’ve come to be
and how much love is what you do deserve
despite whatever in the past you have heard

my love for you is unconditional and pure
yet the distance between us pierces my core
I want nothing more than the best things for you
just the opportunity to show you what it means to be true
but your defenses are strong, your walls just too high
for me to find a way past them I look to the sky
and pray with every drop of passion in my soul
that God will find a way to heal and make you whole

for now I just wait, in pain and despair
and wish there was a way to show you that I care
for you and your life and your happiness and heart
while I wait for a time when you show that you’re smart
enough to accept the unbridled joy I can give
that will let you take advantage of what it means to live
to truly embrace all you’ve been given
and take full enjoyment in the life that you’re livin’

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Mayor Dbag

Ghosts of you linger like a smoke-filled room
Haunting my spirit
Singing the same sad tune
Tonight, I’ll put you out like a half-smoked cigarette
Throw you away before you ruin the rest of my pack
I’ll guzzle you like a glass of red
Then rid myself of you like the excrement you are
Turn the lights down low
Slide the deadbolt
Slowdance with myself to the songs of your demise
Shatter the rose-tinted glasses
Laugh heartily at the pieces of you
Drive over you like a speedbump
(you’d make a great one)
you’ll be my man in Reno
I’ll be your Johnny Cash
tattoo your name on a police report
May God have mercy on your soul!
(if you have one)
leave you under the bridge submersed in troubled waters
decorate the dumpster interior with pictures of you
leave you to hang with your kin
kerosene fills the air
this is the way our story ends
I’m the bang
You’re the whimper.

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Could've Been

I should have not let you go.
I should have ran out after you and told you no,
but I did not and just stood there.
Watch as you walk away after you crush our love and did not even care.
I was not lying when I said everything went cold.
Tears streaming down my face felt like tiny ice particles.
This love story is where I play the broken-hearted girl,
You came into my life and gave it glory before you shatter my world.
One moment I'm fill with hate,
Hurt with this anger and depression from this fate.

I'm living in a world with just you and me.
Where our tears seems like it bleed.
I have a locked heart, pushed you away, and you have the key.
I'm worse than any cruel dictator or war criminal because making an angel mortal was my deed.
I'm lying to myself when I said you're the one I no longer need.
It just that I don't want you here at time like these.
(This story is where the boy) Sitting in rehab and lashing out at everyone, not letting you for the third time see how worse I can be.

The next moment I want you here to talk your sweet talk,
Or take my hand and go for a walk.
Along the lake shore,
Is it too much to ask for it once more?
You could not tell me all of this will end up in ruin, before I fell in love?
Was it worth my heart torn apart knowing there will not be any more doves?
You are the only one who knew what I was thinking even though I sat there silently.
I always thought I was the person that could wait forever for love, but this pain will not let me wait patiently.
My mind fill with anger and depression all the while make me beg. (Grief)
Which make this coldest winter yet. (My belief)

I'm surrounded by people some with the exact same case,
Yet alone barely able too see your face.
I walk away that night,
My heart fill with fright.
I had to force myself not to turn around.
Got into my car before you could make a sound.
Took the plants out my cancer sticks,
Then my greens to make the mix.
Took a puff, gave you a quick glance, and knowing you're going to blame yourself thinking you did something wrong,
Broke your heart, couldn't tell you the truth, and drove away listening to a sad song.

I always told myself that you will come back.
My drug addiction is something I don't slack.
Given you up was hard but at least I gave my final goodbye.
I have been drinking quite a bit from my tea cup cause by your lies.
I thought everything was perfect.
Most people give up a life time, which I'm bless young, to learn what love is.
Even though we're not together you're still my greatest bliss.
My memory bring me to a night under the star, where you move your lips close to mine, and gave me my first kiss.
I ponder the reason you might have the same thoughts.
Care, open mind, and love is what you brought.

The best thing about love is the little things that don't matter much.
The sweater you knitted, I wear it everyday to remind me of your touch.
My eyes open, bringing me back to reality, seeing my homework pile up on the desk.
I should have ran back to you but I didn't and my biggest regret.
Should have ran back to hold you, tell you the truth instead of leading you on.
I am starting to let people make me believe you are not worth it, wasting my life having you as the person I fond.
Possibly the fact that you have completely given up on us.
My phone rang, made me relive that night we discuss.
Didn't pick up because of guilt knowing you loving me is your greatest flaw.
Why won't you answer my phone call?

A story where I'm the boy in deep trouble who gave you up to protect you from harm.
This love story is where I play the broken-hearted girl and need to be back in your arm.
This love story is where I'm being punish even though I did not commit a sin.
A story where every single minutes of the day I think about what could've been.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

All criticism accepted. I need feedback to improve my writing skill. I'm new to this and will probably be posting more sad love poem.

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You Never Loved Me

Ours was never special
All are illusions in my head
You treat me so casual
Heart has been misled

You hold my hand like any other
No different from the rest
Kissed me like you have kissed so many
Embraced without caress

I considered you my true love
While you thought of me as just an option
You were my heaven sent from above
Whereas you regard me as very common

I guess I assumed too much
A weak minded fool
And so continue living, as such
Life can be so cruel

Author's Notes/Comments: 

She has never really loved me the way I love her :(

The One

Once upon a time I met the man of my dreams.
Turns out falling in love is easier than it seems.
He was kind, loving, smart and funny.
Strong, good looking, self-sufficient with money.
He was stubborn, grumpy and a pain in the ass.
Taught me to be tough, helped me find my inner sass.
He was everything I’d looked for all of my life,
and for what he was looking for I’d be the perfect wife.

But something stood between us, something unclear
I waited, I watched, I prayed more than a year.
He made me laugh, smile, helped me be better
I stood by him, comforted him through all kinds of weather.
I believed if trust and dedication I did show
that his feelings for me couldn’t help but to grow.
But they didn’t…couldn’t…wouldn’t…simply are not there
I have cried as wondered if he ever would care.

And now I’ve accepted it never will be
No matter what I say or do, he just doesn’t want me.
I’m going to move forward, try to move on.
So why does my heart feel so very wrong?
There are other men around, others who can see
and truly appreciate wonderful me.
The problem is I feel like I’m settling for them.
because as nice as they are, they just are not him.

They have wonderful features, nice enough hearts
but aren’t the complete package – not right from the start.
I’ve lost the one with whom I was meant to be,
So now I’ll just choose someone to tolerate me.
My heart’s just not in it, though I know I’ll be kind
I can’t dedicate my whole heart, my soul and my mind
because there are pieces of me that aren’t mine to give
Those pieces are his for as long as I live.

It’s tragic, it’s sad, other relationships are doomed
But I’ll smile, be perky, I’ll give them the moon.
I’ll dedicate myself as much as I can
Keeping a secret inside – that they aren’t the right man.
They’re not the person I was meant to love
they aren’t the one who was sent from above
to show me how deep true love can run.
I’m going to just settle because I can’t have The One.

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Enough Says the "Soul"

Folder: 
Visions

Enough you, with this silly whining.
What you see's lost, write off as so!

 

But, not long ago, the sun was shining
And loved as no boy will ever know;
She led the way, I went dancin' after,
Replete were amorous days, thereafter.

When I hotly lusted she always bowed
So that my wild oats should be sewed.

 

But she's now cold, is too removed.
Reach instead for this witty forebode:
You were desperate and blind,
You were lonely, feeble of mind.

Hound for her not like dogs for a bone,
Like a scoundrel mutt from the pen,
But to merely forget and bemoan
That her you met, again and again.

And mark her as object unknown
In your thoughts as I will in mine.
And get thee again to thine throne,
Search thee there for femme divine.

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End.

Folder: 
Just poems

Window panes in the dark
secrets locked within...
Twisted whispers whirl about
dance the dance of sin.
Broken mirror on the floor
yesterdays hope reflected...
Dreams dangle from a noose
forbidden love rejected.
Cinders pop beneath the hearth
vacant words to vapor...
crimson color stealing sight
Blood of her hearts raper.
Nevermore was softly sung
while razor ripped thru flesh...
pleads for help screamed unheard
As body made final thresh.

End.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

I was in a dark mood when I wore this.

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It's confusing, to say the least

I always knew that there was something odd,
Something off, but brushed it away.
Now that everything's clear of the misty fog,
My feelings are no longer astray.

I still feel the same, though,
But just a little weirded out.
And even though it's been awhile ago,
I'm not filled with doubt.

It was really shocking,
but I kind of expected it.
It explains everything,
And yes, I even choked a bit.

It was hard not to,
seeing as I adored you.
I always thought that you were who you were,
But I'd still be your admirer.

It's not that bad,
It was just a little strange.
The truth is just a little bit hard to stomach,
A little bit out of range.

It doesn't change anything,
although it might feel a little awkward,
It will take awhile to let this sink in,
Because it's still a little disappointing.

~

By: RaiLiet_lurvs_BL

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Because I just recently discovered that my muse is a she. Don't get me wrong, there's nothing wrong with that, but the fact that I thought that she was a guy was way sinked in into my brain for far too long that it's a little weird to start calling what was supposedly "him", a "she"...

Haha. xDD. She's still my obsession though. >:}. For everyone else that viewed this poem as something else, feel free to do so, but keep in mind that this is the real meaning of the poem...
Feel free to say your thoughts about the poem... (Or about my A/N. xDD.)
---
For HER.(<---- Convincing myself. xDD.) And for the people who can relate to the poem.

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