Changes

One Day At A Time.

Loving you is like tying my stomach in knots just to connect a few dots

Loving you is like asking the robin that thinks it's a blue bird to remember it's a robin, and it's laid an egg.

You laid an egg!

Or, rather you helped procure one.


You're here now. Remember?

You're back on this plane(t) of rock hard existence

Where you know only shame


How's that working out for you, so far?


You see... Loving you is like picking up each piece of plaster in a disaster and [then] asking it to stop crumbling

Could you please just stop crumbling. FUCK.

I can't take it anymore with the decay.

Put your self back together.


Loving you is like losing a piece of time, in the grand scheme of all things,

and then setting expectations for when this will all come back into frame.

When will this all come back in to focus?

When will this all come back?

Will this all come back?


Loving you has been like the most gut wrenching ride, I've ever felt in my life.

It's like a constant influx of hellos, and a steady stream of goodbyes.

Loving you is like holding onto a stream, where you can see it flow through, passed you,

but there's nothing stealthy enough to hold you.

Besides, why would I?


What would be the point in building a damn to stop your flow?

I mean-- like-- GATDAMN can he flow! The world doesn't even know.

But, I do. I know what you can do, because I've been wrapped up in you,

and I've let every aspect of me cave into all the cavenous pits you've created wthin

...and here we are.


We're back in your pit of shame and despair, and I don't have time.

I can't fucking be here.

I have things to do...

A baby to take care of--

and you...

 

Loving you is doing everything I can to not be bitter.

Loving you is remembering that all I wanted was for you to live to be the man he needs you to be.

Loving you means knowing I still have to love me.

 

Things That Can Change You

He cracks two eggs into a pan,

As the smell of morning awakens the kitchen,

His silver car parked outside,

His fat cat watching him from the kitchen window,

He makes his favorite; Mushroom and swiss omellette, bacon, two pieces of toast,

And of course his tall mug of tea,

The plate is overflowing,

Butter is making a slow drip onto the table,

As the steam rises and the smoke dances from the freshly sizzled eggs and bacon,

He is scrambling to dive his fork into his meal,

He wouldn't want to be late again,

He has no idea that this will be the last time he eats breakfast in his own home,

The last time he sees his mother,

I want him to stay, enjoy being normal,

Enjoy having his crazy family,

Because at least he has them,

 

Soon she'll finally have enough,

She'll leave town,

Try her luck on her own,

I remember her confessing her secret poem to me,

When I was too young,

Terrified that for the first time in my young life,

I could do nothing to keep her tears from falling,

They fell like rapids,

Each one avalanching off her cheek,

Splashing to the ground,

Like a rain drop, like a tsunami,

I could see his hands stroking her hair,

His body against her back,

His whispers barking at her ear,

Her shivers with each syllable,

As he slowly buried her innocence,

I can see everything she hid from him at that exact moment,

All the beauty and strength that he will never get to see,

It crumbles down her face like pieces to a puzzle,

She stops reading,

She's hyperventilating,

"It's okay" I say like some fucking broken record,

"It's okay, I swear" As I beg myself to shut up,

 

That was her day to never be normal again,

The day life stopped being familiar,

Her cries still ring in my ears

Her hand still welded with mine

 

 

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Dishonest Man

I'm hesistant to admit

That I've never felt this way before

I'm willing to permit

You to change me at my core

 

I've written poetry for girls

Who tear down my many walls

But know as this one unfurls

It's not for you at all

 

I'm a relationship man

Like a sweet girl, not a ditz

But  I just want a one-night stand

Or maybe friends with benefits

 

I've always been one for cuddling

I'll be the big spoon through the night

But these new feelings have been bubbling

Just want me some afternoon delight

 

My old self has been upended

These changes have left me vexed

Won't got out with the girls and be friended

But call me after and you'll get birthday sexed

 

Let it be known I'm not in it for the long run

But for now, why don't we give it a whirl

If we get caught, that's all the more fun

You could make a dishonest man out of me, girl

Author's Notes/Comments: 

I don't really like this one. Not so much that I'll say I hate it, but not enough that I'll still post it here and pretend I don't want anyone to see it. Wrote it on my lunch break: practice makes perfect.

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SHITTY ASS CITY

IT'S FUCKED

 

It's fucked

 It's shitty

 Fuck everybody

 In this shitty ass city

 I would blow this bitch up

 And burn the motherfucker down

 Before I get anything for anyone

 In this shitty ass town

 Im about to roll

 Be long gone

 You wont hear shit from me

 But this shity ass song,

 You say you got the fire

 Haha fucker please

 I get a better high

 From a fuckin sneeze,

 You silly imposter

 Your a fuckin wanna be,

 Fuck u to bitch

 Blow me

 That's ok

 That'll be just fine

 There's enough for you 2 bitch

 Stand in line,

Kick some ass

 And take some names

 After my ole lady droped some bombs

 My ass aint been the same

 Cant get right

 Dont care nomore

 I'd damn sure leave

 If I could just find the door

 Who really gives a fuck

 When it comes down to it

 If it aint about dope

 Then fuckin screw it!

 

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tags:

The Journey

Been on this journey for far too long

But somehow stood still all along

I've lost my map and can't see land

Stranded for years out at sea man

I pray the lord extends a free hand

And I can envision THE plan

But spoken words are easier than actions

When it's time to act I fall prey to distractions

Can't help but wonder if it'll ever happen

Or am I destined for pain everlasting?

Each day I live this life

I know I'm not living right

I can't even call what I'm doing living

That's an insult to the gift I was given

I want my real life back where the colors are vivid

As my pen hits the pad, my morals now a kleptomaniac

They've stolen my spirit, begging myself to give it back.

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EVER CHANGING

Folder: 
REVISED

Flowers
blooming
displaying
their beauty
then wilts, the season changes.

Leaves
cling to the
trees creating
shades protecting
from the summers scorching sun.

Snow
lying on the
ground glistening
in the moonlight, such a
lovley aura, warms melting.

love
so hot and
passionate cools
life is ever changing
revolving, from hot to cold.

copyright by heather burns

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tags:

Contented

Folder: 
International

As we came into this world
Clothe in our skin
We were wrapped
In a bundle of cloth
And now we crave
To wear something fave.

We slept soundly at night
In our mother’s arm
We were not afraid
Not even with the dark
Now we pay for the guards
To keep us safe and protected.

We had simple needs
A bath, a hug and a kiss
Then we felt relaxed
Now, we go to the spa
To have a massage
And express ourselves
Thru the cyberweb.

We mop, clean and weed
To keep the sweat coming out
And we buy machines
For the food, laundry and stuff
Then we go the gym
To keep a healthy bod.

Our ways and lives have evolved
Step ahead, adapt to changes
Get a life and uncover its mysteries
Then at the end of the day
I had a contented life, you’ll say!

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It was You Who Chose Me

Many times I asked myself why.
Many times I cried alone wishing I would die.
Many times I asked God what is the reason for me to have these painful feelings.
Lord, can you please tell me your purpose and your meaning.
Why must I bare these things that I'm going through.
I sat alone, and then I heard a voice say, "it's because I have chosen you."
I didn't get it at first.
Did he choose me to live with this hurt.
How am I suppose to have faith and trust in what is unseen.
It took a while for me to understand what he means.
so here it is.
The answer to my quiz.
It was you who chose me to be your child.
As long as my journey has been, you've been with me for every mile.
It was you who chose me to feel this pain.
You knew I'd be strong. I wouldn't be the same.
You chose me to be different from the world.
You chose me to comfort other girls.
You chose me at this time.
You knew I would recognize and understand your signs.
You chose me for these reasons.
Why?
Because everything under the sun has its season.
You chose me at this place.
You chose me to win this race.
This race in life.
It was you who saved me every time I cut my self with a blade or a knife.
You saved me from overdosing.
So for you, my heart, Im opening.
It is you who stands there with your arms opened wide.
Waiting for your chosen ones to choose your side.
I'm glad I have made my choice.
I'm glad that when I truly listen, I hear your voice.
I invited you to live in my heart,
because I know you're the only one who can fix what the world has torn apart.
I knew you loved me when Jesus died for my sins.
It's good to know that I have a true friend.
I know that you show me your mercy and grace when I pray on my knees,
But you truly showed me your love because it was YOU who chose ME.

By: Twylla Medina

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CHANGES

Folder: 
2012

Flowers
bloom
displaying
their beauty
then wilts
as the season
changes.

Leaves cling
to the trees
creating shades
protecting from
the scorching
sun.

Snow lying
on the ground
glistening in
the moonlight
such a lovely
aura
as it warms
melting.

A love so warm
and passionate
cools with time.
Life is ever
changing
always revolving
from hot to warm
then cold.

(c) copyright heather burns

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