retrospect

Unsent Letter

Every day is a war, but I know I’m on the losing side;

A dead man walking in borrowed shoes.

Desolate and open, an outsider looking in,

In moments, in waves,

The pre-planned illusion of destiny;

To see a future lover, lost to propaganda,

The isolation of what was meant to be,

Lost in hazy, daydream possibility;

There’s a bleak, momentary gain,

In knowing there’s loyalty in-between the shade.

Pain is a refuge; impossible communication,
Intertwined blood brothers, coming out from the inside,
Scratching at each other’s skin; another addiction, another pill,
Forgetting the beauty they’ve clawed within.
An unresolved dominance; freedom with a gun,
A weapon replaces where there was once a tongue,
What was never said is now written in blood,
A myriad, labyrinthine mind swallowed up in cataclysm,
The moment is strangled in an everlasting hold.

Kiss the sky, cold peaks and a forest to lose each other in,
A man cannot be saved by his own futility,
Unloved, unwanted, undeniably yours;
When nothing presents itself, but you,
Endlessly waiting, nothing but hesitation,
Your lust for everything that is not me,
Does your love exist? Only the fantasy is preserved,
An epiphany formed from the evangelist’s son.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

A lot of things left unsaid, both during and after a relationship ends... but also the journey...

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Chasing Time

Memories are fading,

Remember your smile.

Please tell me you remember mine,

What is lost is not forgotten,

I cherish every moment we were both alive.

 

Seems natural my heart became an icicle cavern,

No man should be told not to feel,

Or compromise.

Lack of passion and driven insanity,

Intoxicated with desire,

An empty bottle filled with the pretence of ego,

Swallowed with pride; still room left to breathe.

 

Haunting memory of a smile almost forgotten,

Here with me, teach me your intoxicating poison:

The drip is an overflow of promises to keep,

I never kept them; do you shower me with shame?

 

The irrelevance I feel,

The impudent, lonesome warrior;

We fought, so I became the fighter,

Limbs become weak in the absence of shelter.

If we could go back in time,

Chasing the same dreams,

Are we still the same aspiration,

Or masked fallacy?

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Wisdom with age; regret with youthful rashness.

Retrospect.

Folder: 
Poems

Looking back through the years
I see smiles and tears.
Those lost and those found.
Everything like a circle seems to come around
Round and Round we go,
Where life stops only the fates know.
Slow Motion; Fast Forward; Repeat
I can't look back with any regret
For these are the days I shall never forget.  

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