Neptune Junior


I had the magic eye to know that he was there,

to the others, he could have been Thunder.

Pulsing angry heart flashes bright in the ribcage of black smoke.

I feel pathetic, cowering in a splintering vessel.

While Neptune's almighty roar is too loud to hear.

Rope burn stings, and I hold my hands out to the brewing storm.

One deafening plunge of his Staff and cold sharp splatters of rain freeze the pain.


He pulled the short straw, I've always believed.

Submerged to purge the sea of mortal rule,

An eternity of counting sharks but still

he's there enough to see my ship to shore. 

Author's Notes/Comments: 

This is technically Mythology, but oh well.

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The Plague's Maid

She split the world in twenty ways,

The day she stirred a deadly plague,

To rid the world of our sins.


Her mission plan was Out To Kill,

She claimed the lives of scum until

her illness broke from its chains.


Then her disease killed hoards for miles,

And she rejoiced Death for a while,

But then her mission backfired.


Her beauty died with countless young,

Her savage bloodlust reeked among

both the Hopeful and Damned.


Now the townsfolk live again,

Too scared to let that woman in,

So she waits until dark. 

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Based on the Scandinavian legend "Pesta" 

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Beware The Lady Mare

Beware the 'mare spectator,

who hurts you as you sleep.

She'll mould your dreams to nightmares

and cackle when you weep.


Beware the fear creator,

She'll crush your wracking chest.

She'll torture you 'til morning says

that Death is for the best.


Beware the dream invader,

When you yawn, retire with care.

With every nightmare, she creates

a knot within your hair. 

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When Children Meet Pirates


I was given the job

by the employer from Hell

of nanny to two girls

called Nancy and Belle.


Their father was a crook,

I knew from the start,

he was gluttonous and vile,

but cunning and smart.


He knew nothing of love,

and had only one ambition,

to torture the Kingdom's pirates

until they fell into submission.


Despite their father's flaws,

the girls were utter joys,

Although Belle was a little stubborn,

And made an awful lot of noise,


See, I was employed for a reason,

I found out on my first day.

The girls were intrigued by a forest,

and I was not to let them stray.


The Bloodcrow Forest was scary,

and huge and quite close by,

And the rumour in the city was

that Pirates were camping inside.


See, they were after something,

and my employer, Mr Pesh,

had let slip that he was responsible

for a catastrophic mess.


Mr Pesh was man of law,

and several months ago,

had captures eleven pirates,

and put their severed heads on show.


The pirates' rage was worrying

to men like Mr Pesh,

more so because his daughters,

longed to see Pirates in the flesh.


So I tried for months to control them,

but Belle could not be tamed,

she'd always dreamt of meeting Pirates,

My bedtime stories were to blame...


Before I could stop her,

she escaped in the dead of night,

We feared she might be murdered,

to her sister's cruel delight.


I'd neglected mute little Nancy

and failed to see her tears,

Belle had bullied her sister

and become the subject of all her fears.


So Nancy didn't care

whether Belle had lived or died,

but I still ran into the forest

and screamed for her to hide.


I rescued twelve-year-old Belle,

who was surprisingly calm.

She said she loved the Pirate camp,

and that the Pirates meant no harm.


I told her this was rubbish,

and she'd heard a bunch of lies,

so she screamed and me and kicked my leg

and ran to her room and cried.


The following morning saw a terror,

in the form of a Pirate siege,

which began in the Castle's Courtyard

while King Ferdinand made a speech.

Mr Pesh was a raging bull

and punched his daughter in the eye,

As it was Belle who told the Pirates

that he'd wanted more to die,


As I ran to safe-guard Nancy,

I watched a Pirate approach poor Belle,

who was being beaten by her father

and being told to rot in Hell.


The Pirate wrenched dear Belle aside

and brandished a glistening sword

and plunged it into her father's chest

until he lay dead on the floor.


I was relieved that Belle was safe,

but she clasped a Pirate's hand

and at first I was bewildered but then

I saw her smile expand.


Could it be that she had met him

during her escapade in the woods?

Could he possibly have loved her?

Could a pirate turn out to be good?


I had more important things on my mind though,

All around me, townsfolk were screaming.

I ran, shielding Nancy

from the buildings that were burning.


Through all the smoke and licking flames,

we searched for the Pirate and Belle,

we thought we saw them running,

but it was difficult to tell.


But soon the smoke began to clear

as did the panic in my head,

and we found Belle and the Pirate

hiding near the Forest's edge.


"This is John Lefevre" Belle told me.

"We're in love and I'm running away.

I'm going with him on the Pirate Ship

To find treasure on some exotic bay."


Naturally I was furious

and I punched Lefevre in the face

I begged Belle to come with me and Nancy

to some new and happier place.

Of course, she refused my offer.

Love is blinding and harming and alarming.

She wanted adventure and excitement and her Pirate,

but her sister simply needed re-homing.


Eventually, Lefevre surrendered

and passed me his young lover's hand.

Belle cried all the way to the station,

where we left for Featherjet Land.


We were happy for a while,

me as mother in a cute little cottage.

I got a job as a local teacher

and the girls became my world.


But one morning before I served breakfast,

I heard Nancy shriek Belle' name.

Belle had fled in search of her Pirate

and Nancy was never the same.


My story does not end here,

neither does Nancy's and neither does Belle's,

So I'll leave it here and collect my memories

So that next time, I have more stories to tell. 

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Monster of a Man

My Mum was a barmaid and my brother was a clown

In a miserable dump of a mining town.


The harbour smelt like mould

and the houses looked like brothels

and the cats killed your dogs and the drunkards pissed in bottles.


My school was a dump

and the children picked on me

and the ceiling had a leak

and the teacher had no teeth.


But I didn't attend for long,

and I wasn't exactly sad

but my mother needed help

 because my brother had gone mad.

You see, my brother was a clown

In a shitty little circus

Which was paradise for prostitutes,

for drunkards and for perverts.


Plus, my brother a good clown,

but others were pretty crap

so the Circus lost their customers

and that was the end of that.


So my dearest older brother

lost his job and joined my mum,

serving ale to vulgar lowlifes,

taking money from the Scum.


Despite all this, there was no money

nor was there food upon our plates

So Mum told me "Nell, you're twelve now,

so you should start pulling your weight."


I didn't want to do this,

But I really had no choice,

And the Lord Mayor offered me a job

In a most remarkable place.


My job was very dangerous and I'm sure it was a crime,

to send a little girl into The Lilac Mine.


The Mine was cold and slippery,

not to mention rather dark,

But I had to hold the lanterns,

for the Miners' while they worked.


And you might call me crazy,

But I know what I heard,

A gypsy band was singing

Which I know sounds quite absurd,


So I tried not to dwell on it,

Because I had to work,

But I was sure that I'd heard songs

Similar to those before...


One night, I hid behind a pile

of coal and waited 'til

all the Miners had gone home

and I was sat in the darkness still.


I ventured down the darkest parts

of the Lilac Mine,

I could hear the songs and smell the scents

of meat and scotch and wine.


This is where my life began to disintegrate to dust,

I don't wish to continue, but really I must.


At the bottom of the mine, I found

A cold, colossal cave

Inhabited by people who looked like

A mauve parade.


Dozens upon dozens of them jumping around and whooping,

purple clothes and purple hair

They saw me and started smiling.


"Join us, little blonde girl,

come and eat some human scraps,

Boiled leg or skewered neck?

Perhaps some belly fat?"


I stupidly joined them for dinner,

which was absolutely strange,

for we were eating human brains

and the Purples were deranged.


The leader was a sprightly man,

They called him Olly Plum.

He sang the songs and played guitar

and was loved by everyone.


The others were his brothers

and his multitude of wives,

but his daughter Violet reminded me

of an old friend of mine.


One summer, when I was seven,

I knew a girl called Sally.

We were close companions

'til they found her dead in an alley.


The thing about Violet was

not that she was kind,

although she was, and funny and crazy,

but she acted like a child.


She danced when her father sang,

and her brothers played the drums,

Her family adored her,

but none more than Olly Plum.


Although I loved their music,

I was a little scared.

What if they wanted to eat me?

Oh well. No-one would have cared.


I sang with them until Midnight,

by which time I was very tired

I'd hoped my Mum would be sleeping,

but she was waiting by the fire.


"Where the hell have you been?!

I've been worried sick!"

"I'm sorry Mum, I just got lost,

took a wrong turn into a ditch!"


"That'll explain the state of you. Off you go to bed!

Be sure to come home early tomorrow or trust me, you'll be dead!"


I knew my Mum was angry,

but I couldn't have cared less,

because I knew the Purples

would have caused me less distress.


I decided I would live with them,

and play their music too.

In hindsight, it was stupid and I'm sure

You think it was too.


I went to work and returned to the cave

on the day I turned Thirteen.

I asked to join their band

and Violet gave me a tambourine.


"We'll be just like sisters," she whispered to me that night.

But as she came close, I saw in her eyes, something which gave me a fright.


The Purples' eye were purple too!

And that's what made me scared.

If I stayed here and my eyes turned mauve,

would my vision be impaired?


Apparently not. You see, I asked

 Olly Plum, who said,

that the colour of their eyes

was nought to do with their homestead.


"Purple" was a curse of hate,

the townsfolk were to blame.

They chased them into The Lilac Mine

to the Purples' utter shame.


"Why Purple, though?" I asked him.

And he answered: it's what becomes

of us people, who are pelted with

the stones and pulp of plums!


I took his word for gospel,

and lived happily with his crew...

But one day, I saw in my reflection

that my eyes were purple too!


"What is this?!" I cried. "What's happened to me?

I've caught the Purple Curse!"

"Relax," said Violet, "Your eyes are purple,

your life could be much worse!"


She couldn't have been more right, you see,

For things began to change.

We'd eaten lots of townsfolk,

so the Mayor had a Search arranged!


One night at eleven,

Us Purples tried to be quiet,

but one person who could not sit still

was my darling Best Friend, Violet.


She stood up and danced and we begged her to stop

But her feet and arms kept going.

Then, the search party found us all

And the next moment: we were screaming.


The Townsfolk were ruthless and hit the Purples'

on their heads.

I begged a Gentleman to stop,

but he arrested me instead!


My brother Clown, restored to sanity

Bought me from my cell.

I was relieved, but then he told me

that the Purples were condemned to hell.


At their execution, The Magistrate roared:

"These cannibals now shall  hang!"

 But I screamed and I cried and I yelled at him:



The first to meet the gallows

Was my darling Violet, who smiled.

"Don't worry, dear Nell. We're both going to hell,

so we'll only be apart for a while!"


The rope met her neck and the townsfolk rejoiced

that this monster would soon be dead.

A masked man pulled the leaver and the whole world could hear

the "snap" which had broken her neck.


I live with my mother, and whenever she hits me

I can hear poor Violet's neck snap.

They have closed Lilac Mine, but whenever I see it,

Part of me wants to go back...





Author's Notes/Comments: 

Reviews are most welcome!

A Sailor's Tale

Ahoy there matey

Please share me your rum

I'll tell you a story

Of Midnight and Blum

Midnight, the greatest ship on the sea

Blum was the Master, the best may be he

Sailing to England, for spices and gold

As he hit a nor'easter, the tale will unfold

Seems Blum and his crew were tossed all around

A sea full of madness, most men had drowned

The sails were all shredded, the mast, it was gone

Blum and his small crew would never see home

As the waves calmed down, the fog lifted, you see

Blum had no idea of where they may be

Well, weeks went by, they died one by one

Only the Master was left, he be all alone

Supplies had all perished, no drink found at hand

Blum knew he was finished, so he formed a plan

He gathered up bodies, fed them to the sea

Just Blum and his Midnight, together they be

He died that night, a smile on his face

That ship, never found, not nary a trace

Legends may go, as well as may come

But Midnight and Blum, forever sail on

Author's Notes/Comments: 

As an ex-sailor, I enjoy writing about the sea!

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I curse the hag that stole me

Bathed me in Mimir’s well.

For I saw how the gods would one day wake.

How with Fenrir’s howl the brave would quake.

How the rainbow bridge would fall.

When the world tree shakes,

And the cold seas boil,

Poisoned, in the serpent’s coil.

While wolves devour the moon and sun

And Thor is lost in a fight he won.

How Sutr’s fire will light our pyre

When this our world has gone.

But worst of all the things I saw

Was the marvel of bright Baldur’s hall,

Where the skald's song

Holds the feast in thrall.

But for all that I could see

There was no place in that hall

For me!

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The Princess and the Three Sons

There once was a wealthy king whose daughter was the most beautiful woman in all the land. Many men sought her hand, but were quickly turned away, because the king had promised his daughter to the son of an old widower.

On the eve of the princess' 18th birthday, the old widower arrived at the palace with his family. Alas! He had three sons! So the king decided each man should say why he'd make the best husband, and the princess could pick her favorite.

The youngest son said, "I am the most handsome of my brothers; I have many youthful years to share with you!"

The middle son said, "I am the wealthiest of my brothers; I have many worldly treasures to share with you!"

The oldest son said, "I am the wisest of my brothers; I have much knowledge to share with you!"

The princess thought for a moment. Then she turned to her father and said, "Great father, all three of these men would be wonderful husbands. But I, too, am handsome, wealthy, and wise. Why should I settle for one of three rivers when I can have the ocean they sprang from?"

And she married the widower the very next day.

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The Whoretesan

In the blackest room

of the House of Sand

slept a married father

and his whoretesan.

He whispered sweetings

against her shoulder.

The girl grew old

as the wife grew colder.

In the blink of an eye

and breadth of a wink,

the man had more duty

and less time to think.

In the blackest room

of the House of Sand,

he called for his whore

and he bound her hands.

"Oh, darling girl!

Unpure but true!

I've kissed and clutched

enough of you!

Weep all you want,

weep all you may;

I made you here

and here you'll stay."

And back he went

to his frozen wife,

living a pale

and paltry life.

The whoretesan

did fade and rot,

but sweet, sad tears,

her eyes had naught.

In thirty years

there came a man--

the father's son--

to the House of Sand.

In the brightest room

where the water ran,

he found and married

the whoretesan.

The girl was a wife

with charm and good taste,

with passionate eyes,

with a slight, slender waist,

and though he loved her

and held her dear,

her hate for his father

filled him with fear.

In the blackest room

of the House of Sand,

the father was burried

by the whoretesan:

where once the sheets

fell soft and hot,

she laid his body

down to rot.

The son then lost

his ghostly wife,

and soon he ended

his young life.

In the blackest room

of the House of Sand

lays a husband's corpse,

sits a whoretesan.

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