Shopping [Haqueian Verse]

Haqueian Verse


Is to be done,

EID awaits,

Delight is,


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I am scared of my hoover

I am scared of my hoover

By jfarrell



I am scared of my hoover.

I bought it about nine months ago,

A “vax” power nano,


Sounded so coooooooooool.


Silver grey handle and base.

Transparent bagless chamber,

With a red hat to empty it.

And a bunch of tubes.


I’ve used it twice.

The second time I used it

I think I broke it

And I am scared to confirm that fear.


If the hoover I spent £120 on nine months ago

Is broken

It means I have six months worth of cat hair

To sweep up with a dustpan and brush.


And that ain’t gonna be fun :(


Author's Notes/Comments: 

i broke it, what a donut, eh? :)

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A Twentieth Century Girl Goes Shopping

Out shopping are these women

some are much like me,

beautiful, young and rich

all the 'perfect girl' should be. 


But what these women do not wish,

I fear it's only me,

is the hope of a united future 

one where I'm with thee.


These women with their riches

could not dream of a man like you,

for you are as sweet as summer nights 

as dark as the hell that is due,


to be unleashed when they find out 

but for now I care not at all,

for all I want is to be with you

and be with you I shall. 

Author's Notes/Comments: 

So yes another poem about a girl in love but forbidden love is a facinating concept to me. I feel like love should not be something dictated by law (that is to say reciprocated, true love and not evil, twisted ideals of the word) We should be free to love as we choose and I hope this conveys how hard it is to love someone you are technically not allowed to whether it be family, religious or political restraints its easy to feel alone and I hope this poem conveys how she feels alone but that the love is so strong that she does not care what people will think of her if/when they find out she is willing to be so alone for love and that is a powerful and damning thing. 

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Lady Fickle is Bridget Jones’s Bible

Lady Fickle


It is dedicated to all the girls who do not always manage to live up to their expectations. They are a little overweight, off-color among their girlfriends, insecure and shabby. When they were little girls, they couldn’t wait for the time, when they would be able to do all they want, wear high heels and realize their dreams. They have always dreamt to be elegant, iconic ladies. But some things got in the way. Money got in the way, they always do, sooner or later. Dreams gave way to the routine. Frankly, some of us deeply suffer because their life is richer on the inside. They know they deserve some things like a lovely soul mate, dream job and may be to write a bestseller. Everything is ahead of them; they just don’t know where to start. So, they never do…Instead of becoming an icon they live like tiny little frogs, who admire the women-icons from their bog.


How to turn a frog into a princess?

Know that the princess lives within you; she just deserves to be taken care of and respected. And sometimes you have to set spurs of dreams to the unicorn she is riding. Feed her

DIY artistic objects
soft erotica
autobiographies of successful people
interviews with colorful personalities
inspiring literary excerpts
basically self-development in every aspect.


Note how her personality changes with practice. Note how she will gather enthusiasm and inspiration. See her become more and more expressive and adorable. What this website is meant to be is the tool, may be the environment in which every woman becomes someone who makes her inner child happy. Her own feelings, sweetness and grace. Her smiles, kisses and sighs.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

my ode entitled 'shopping machine'

belief system

Shopping Machine

Your born and raised as a shopping machine
Shopping with mummy initially
Picking up your shopping habits
From your pushchair lookout
Trying to pick things up to play
To make it a more enjoyable day


Not just your early shopping experience
Everything under your roof to behest
From early age, taught to sit on chairs
Sleep on a bed, all to generate profit
Nothing wrong with comfort in life

But nothing like some basic living

To teach you the value of everything
Also true merit in fasting
Sleeping and eating on the floor
A flexible fit body would ensure
Without an overpriced gym membership

They are truly amazing: squat toilets

Valuable lessons living in the east
You can be fit as a flea: for free
But can you give up cream cakes?
Come on, it’s only for a day
Or have you got a potato crisp fetish?
50% fat, so please stick to lettuce


Try giving up food for a day or two
An overeating body will truly thank you
But really have you ever stopped to think?
If there is more to life than giving
Most of your salary to someone or something
Just to tread water; day to day living


Unless your seriously wealthy already
Climbing capitalism’s ladder; getting heady
Though if you've exploited anyone at all
In your ascent of this dog eat dog world
I can assure you your card is marked
Spiritual graduation coming , no head start


In fact your going to pay the price
For exploiting others in this human life
You w ill go the same way as Steve Jobs
Who was surely killed by God
For being so uncaring and exploiting all
In his factories, to suicide some did fall


Because they weren’t treated fairly at all
God don’t mind capitalism, as long as it’s equitable
But if the thing be akin to dog eat dog
Back either of them, your lot
In this life game of Monopoly
If you have morals, treat people fairly
Then you get treated fairly too
Any other way and your life to loose

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