astray
Lost
I opened my eyes another day seeing only
the same endless ocean. This beautiful,
disheartening endless ocean.
A ship with the possibilities to be seen for
many miles. Yet, the oceans waves taunt me
with its excessive, dramatic waves.
Concealing me from the eyes of others.
This ocean; my best friend, my enemy. The
reason I have discovered the woes of
isolation.
Daily I wake up with a heart's desire to see
land, to move onward in my life's journey.
The oceans jealousy believes its memories
will be lost, but never. I vow! Caring
nothing for my hearts desire, yet it
mocks me with possibilities. Possibilities
that I might one day feel and experience what is now only memories.
my months spent crying, pleading, full of
hateful anger changed nothing. As I awoke
my eyes each morning was locked on the
same blue ocean floor. Deep waves, cool
breezes, moving deep sea passer-bys of the unknown.
I potentially die from the thought of
marriage to this mountain of beautiful
misery.
Years of plotting my escape proved to b
e act of a dreamer, not a doer.
My heart has grown numb and in my numbness, its torture lacks the effect it once had. I scream to all, my voice stripped and dry, barely heard by even the wind.
the silence of my unheard words replaced with the crashes of ocean waves; I will never submit.
Even while my knees have bent and come closer and closer to the panels of stained wood.
I seemingly lose the courage to keep with my
vow to never submit, yet my vow to leave
this prison of cumbersome water has
engulfed me in disillusion.
In my lucid thoughts, I mumble of its
devilish games. The games that I will never willingly accept.
I listen to its illustrious melody. I am its mistress, a
the battle that seems impossible.
I am lost...
I am weak...
I will FIGHT till death approaches me.
Under Skin
These demons inside me
Stretch this body; so worn
Wearing me like prideful skin
Comfort is never born
Damned a daughter of Darkness
It leads, whenever I stand
"Come with me" it whispers
As its slowly giving a hand
Ripples under skin
Tingling down my spine
Where is the light so needed?
Where is the divine?
It's slithering through my veins
Beating with every thought
"Rest your head" it whispers
"I'll give you everything you've sought"
Fighting within myself
Will it ever go?
Or will I be lost forever?
The Darkness loving to sow
I feel like this is the end
How can I spread this out?
Justifying my passage not clear
Still swallowed by its wrathful clout
Astray
Its all about sex
Its all about drugs
Its all about money
and all about the thugs
Its all about popularity
Its all about the clique
Its all about fitting in
Its all about shit
Its all about style
Its all about fame
To me its all fucking lame
These stupid trends
and trying to fit in
Trying to look like her
Trying to be like him
Putting others down will make you win
Its all about looks
not what's within
These shallow people
Have no sense of humor
All they have are "twins"
Well, I don't want to be like her
I don't want to act like him
Just being myself,
You all act like its a sin
I may not be a saint
I may not be in style
All I know is
we are only here for a while
So I'm gonna live life the way I want
And they cant get in my way
I am gonna go astray
I may get shoved around
but that wont stop me
I will pick myself off of the ground
and keep on walking
Its my life and I'll live the way I want
I'll never give up
because I know that's what you want
So screw you
I don't like you anymore
Your face is such an eye sore
Its my life and I'll live the way I want
I'll never give up
because I know that's what you want