First, I commend you for: First, I commend you for exposing the brutal reality of a humanitarian crisis that should be completely unacceptable in any society that calls itself enlightened, particularly any first world country with resources, but not the political will, to end it in a compassionate way.
In my view, such hyper-individualism is a form of tyranny, so this cause has been dear to my heart for many years.
With piercing and unsparing poetic sleight of hand, you utilized your skill for setting a gripping stage to show contrast as well as parallels between physical and emotional need, with the emotional being as, if not more, excruciating to the inner self, the true self.
“Marble floors echo louder than alleys” Absolutely.
Congratulations on this example of superior talent used in the service of vital issues. Great respect!
An introspection done right.: An introspection done right. You supported your first thought by showing, not taking the easy route by telling, why it is so. Great conversational style that created a relaxed and relatable connection. And this:
“like tarnished treasure” A killer simile.
Loving this free-spirited contemplation.
Your ability to reach far,: Your ability to reach far, astonishingly far, and bring Heaven to Earth, the expansive into the human experience, giving both the honor they deserve, is a master class in sacred poetry.
Enormous accolades! Can’t praise this enough.
Simply breathtaking.
The: Simply breathtaking.
The spare, sweeping, billowing lines mimic the motion and mystery of the sea, infusing the emotion with the grandeur of nature. So many layers of perfect beauty in the moment when everything converges into wonder. And the freedom: absolutely palpable.
Every line is both thunder and the softest light.
True art.
Your first line is very much: Your first line is very much like the Orthodox belief that Heaven and Hell are the various souls' experience (based on how they lived on earth) of God's effulgent light.
This hits like a riddle and:
This hits like a riddle and a dare, Let's see the (Socratic pehaps) hemlock as both silence and perfection,
the price of words weighed against their cost. A poem that stares you down and refuses to flinch.
This is a powerful: This is a powerful reimagining of the phoenix myth,
the contrast of timeless cycle with our mortal brevity.
The image of the bird sustained by human tears is haunting,
and the closing prayer for love to resurrect from fire
gives the piece both ache and hope.
A truly striking meditation on endurance and renewal.
This is luminous, Karl! I: This is luminous, Karl! I love how you move from the vastness of the cosmos to the intimacy of human connection.
The sun’s fusion as a metaphor for love and presence is so powerful,
especially in the way you show warmth igniting meaning in a cold universe.
The closing lines about being becoming light and two becoming one are quietly transcendent.
This piece really moved me,:
This piece really moved me, patriciajj ...the bonsai image captures so vividly how age can prune life down,
yet the closing vision opens into something vast and luminous.
I love how you hold the tension between diminishment and faith,
ending with that powerful affirmation of never having left God. A beautiful meditation.
Wow!! So many bridges between: Wow!! So many bridges between a few very intense mood shifts, from feeling as bleek and empty on the canteen as a melancholic drifter, with wisdom which showers down like dry leaves in fall, braids playing upon the back of a dainty darling playing upon the playground swing of better memories...
Thank you, so glad the:
Thank you, so glad the railroad metaphor resonated with you. I wanted it to carry both the physical sense of movement and the more inward sense of crossing from one state to another, so it means a lot to hear that it came through.
This really touched me,: This really touched me, thank you. That opening line was meant to carry its own weight, almost like a hinge the rest of the poem could lean on, so it means a lot that it struck you so strongly. And describing the “restless stillness” of reverb as more than a feeling, but an experience is exactly the atmosphere I was hoping to conjure, where silence itself becomes charged with memory. Your words capture the spirit of the piece beautifully.
I really appreciate this,: I really appreciate this, Starward-Led. "Burnt Offerings" was not immediately on my radar, but I love that connection. The way that film makes the house itself feel like a living, haunted presence is very close to what I was trying to capture with the silence in this poem. I wanted the space to feel charged, as if it remembered more than it revealed. Thanks for drawing that parallel. It’s a really great lens to see the piece through.
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