emotional abuse

Offspring Treason

 

I'm so damn beaten down,

still so emotionally abused,

Cruelly, verbally attacked,

...and so wrongly accused. 

 

From such spiteful, hurtful,

and hateful, misguided fools.

Influenced by others, not aware,

they are being used as tools.

 

Tools, just out to hurt me,

for no actual, damn reason. 

My own flesh and blood-

-An 'offspring-treason'.

 

May as well twist out my heart,

and throw it there, on the floor.

Because it can't take this pain,

or this hurting, anymore.

 

All I've done is try harder,

and cry too many endless tears.

Anything I even try to say,

falls upon, deafened ears.

 

They can't see what they do,

through such tainted eyes.

And no more can I take,

all the vicious attacks and the lies.

 

I birthed them, I nursed them,

I raised and susatined their very lives.

Just to now be paid back in full,

with their back-stabbing knives.

 

It shames me now, to admit,

this abuse, by two children of mine.

Taught so well by him, how to hurt,

and how to abuse and to malign.


For I did not raise them with hate,

only showed them my love and affection.

Their outcome-a result of watching abuse,

and learning all about, his rejection.

 

They are too tainted now, to see truth,

though I pray it someday, can be done.

For even through all this heart-wrenching pain,

I still love my daughter, and my son.

 

Forged

Folder: 
On Life and Living

 

I've been through the fires,

Flames that blister-burned.

I'm left with reminder-scars,

Of the lessons I've learned.

 

And from those gray ashes,

I arose up, and I flew-

Away from the searing pain,

Of all I've been through.

 

Stronger than ever, I emerged,

Wiser, have I now, been made,

With a soul forged of embers,

For hell's price, have I paid.

 

 

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Love After My War

Folder: 
Soul Poetry

 

I fought for me.

Finally,

And at long last,

Did I decide

That enough

was way past

Enough!

 

I prayed for a peace

For strength,

And prayed for

The courage

That until now

Eluded my

every step.

 

And with the heart

Of a battle ready warrior,

My soul my weapon,

I made my stand,

Stood fast

And fought for

My very life.

 

After countless years

Of defeat

Of battle-scarred losses,

This was my

Gettysburg,

And victorious,

I emerged.

 

Now,

I fight that fight

No more.

I have found peace

In triumph

And love

After my war.

 

 

 

A Soul-Resurrected

Folder: 
Soul Poetry

 

I thought it now barren,

just empty of all emotion-

save for the despair

that so filled the hollow voids

and overtook any and all joy.

 

Now made to close itself off,

from the hurtful, hurled words,

-a verbal bashing of a heart,

long-numbed from maiming

and cold to missing affections.

 

No longer an open novel,

shared with others, unashamed,

now bound up tightly

with its very own bindings,

in attempt to protect and shield.

 

I had to...to simply survive.

It became necessary

to shutter my eyes closed,

lest someone penetrate

my occular windows...and learn.

 

Learn of the misery, the fear,

the utter anguish and torment,

that for so long, far TOO long,

was concealed and masked,

in fear of anyone, knowing my truth.

 

Because who would believe

after so many years of concealing,

that such was my my existance

for almost...all along

so much that I wished to die.

 

Then in a sudden moment of Grace,

as I sat, tears streaming,

hands upturned, in sobbing prayer,

lost and broken, I petioned Him,

And God heard...and answered.

 

He gave me my answer-

along with the courage, the strength

and determination to break the ties,

that for too long, held me bound-

an inmate to another's sentencing.

 

No longer afraid, I rose up,

standing as tall as my convictions

and in a mere conversation,

took back and took charge

of what was mine-my very life-my soul.

 

In what can only be God's planning,

His desire for His daughter's  happiness,

He gave hope and love, back to me,

In a most unexpected source-

Where a past, became the present.

 

No longer devoid of any emotion,

No longer tied to what was,

Now moving forward to who is,

I am now, a soul-resurrected,

And life, became again, so worth living.

 

 

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Knights Of The Turned Table



》¤《

 



"Place thine lacy panties

Upon thy shiny bald head,

And bow unto my knees

To lick the toejams from my feet,

O mine sex servant."



 

 

"And dost before mine majesty,

Thy table dance

For inspection of thy loins,

So I may'st approve,

Or throw thine arse

To the next fair maiden!! "




》¤《




Inspired by:

SSSSSSmoothest.

 

Author's Notes/Comments: 

This is more or less done in a degrading way, the same way men for years have "dressed women up" in the garb of "their" choice and degraded them through using as an object of seduction. Written to portray this type of abuse..."flip side".


 

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What do you think will happen now?

what do you think will happen?
you lie to the ONE person you know you shouldn't
you say you love him and you don't
you see other men while you are "with" him
you continue your pursuit of your once secret relationships
relationships where deceit and lies are the foundation
relationships that think they are special to you

it didn't work for us
it won't work for someone else
you need to stop and take some time to yourself
and think about what will happen

you can't protect the feelings of those you care about
you can't use lies to heal
the truth eats away at you
and if you don't stop telling lies, it will consume you completely
and you will look back and see there is nothing for you
what do you think will happen?

it isn't true that not getting caught is things "working themselves out"
it isn't true to lead someone on, that they will be happy with that
it isn't true to sacrifice dignity for no ones sake is helpful to anyone in any way

what do you think will happen?
take the wheel and stop rolling dice
think about how it hurts them in the long run
think about being really nice
if you lie too much, you'll end up believing them too
isn't it a painful confusion to keep the stories straight?
how love for you turns into fear and hate?

try a walk without a report or an audience
try to have a dream and ask yourself what it means
try to listen when someone trusts you and shares with you
try to be honest even though no one really wants the truth
try to think about what it's like to be someone else
try, with the rest of us, to make Earth less of a living hell

what do you think will happen?
do you think you are invisible?
do you think everyone will swallow your pill?
do you think you've finally got your fill,
or do you have a lot more to dole?

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