#hurt

Shattered on the Tile

His eyes

Feed the lies

They are filled with gloss

And loss

And I feel like they are staring at me

And I feel like they are staring at nothing

As his thoughts pour into the air

Silently

His face

Is covered in sweat

And regret

He falls to the floor

Once he can’t think anymore

And there are shattered pieces across the tile

Shattered pieces of hope

Shattered

Clattered

Minds

Sprawled across the ground

But no one makes a sound

It’s the violence

Of the reliance

That makes the brick

Break like a stick

A twig

His eyes

Open big

Then close

And in that moment

The rose

Dies

And all the lies

Lie with us

Before hitchhiking on a bus

To truth

And leaving us

Shattered

On the tile

What is Addiction?

What is addiction?

A small child calls out from the crowd

Her voice isn’t loud

But it breaks the silence

And someone replies and says

It’s the violence

Within our own minds

It’s the loss of sanity

Left behind

The gun with one bullet

Aimed at the head

That slips so slowly through the air

And doesn’t make a sound

As if it were underwater

It’s like when the pencil runs out of led

And the writer can’t get out of bed

Because they have nothing left

But just a hollow pencil

Just a hollow body

No mind

No words

Like a bird

That can’t fly

Because he spent his wings on the temporary high

But, above all these things

Addiction is a sickness

That makes you feel total bliss

But only for a minute

Because after it leaves the body

It leaves you feeling spotty

Because you can’t remember a thing

And you know nothing but the feeling

Of your mind peeling away

And falling into the ocean

Losing motion

Of the land

Because your hand is shaking

And every breathe you are taking

Feels like your last

Until you feed the addiction

With your need for a substance

To take you away

From the pain you feel every single day  

Sun and Moon

I love you

I love you how the plants love the sun

And how the moon loves the earth

I love you from a far

And you have no idea what you do to me

But you make the ocean in my mind

Create waves that destroy my world

And the seeds blossom into vibrant roses

Full of color

Full of life

But at the same time you are the man with the clippers

Clipping each rose of love you have grown

And giving them

To someone else

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My black shadow

Him: I stand alone,

in a candle lit cobbled street.

With nothing left of my life,

but a dark shadow,

that hangs above my head.

With that in mind,

I stride into the welcoming shadows of the night.

Never to look back.


Her: Because he will never return,

because when he looks back,

it hurts.

His heart turns black,

with the pain that has been inflicted,

onto her.

His little girl.


It's who he is now,

a ghost,

that wonders away,

into the mist that is life.


From the pain caused by him to her,

he runs,

so far,

so fast,

it hurts her very core.


To see,

H I M,

turn black with the shadows.

Never to return,

back to me.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Ok so this poem is about after my dad ran away six years ago and how it effected me emotionally. It has a lot of emotional leves and I felt I needed to do something to get a little closer after all this time. I do hope that you enjoy reading it and maybe in a way connect with it. Enjoy ;D 

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tags:

I guess sometimes love just dies

Have I killed it? When I struggled for so long to grasp it, had it for so brief a time that I barely can name it now--was it my lack that sunk it into nothing? And now it comes to friends again, though you had been the one chasing me when I told you that you would make me love you and then leave me there heartbroken. What about me or us makes less seem more? Why would you want to go back to the vagueness of 'just friends' after having the vibrancy of what we can be? It's that pain of soured things that haunts me now. It comes in how I know we should work so well and yet we haven't. In how you understand me but are so wrong when you think I want to change you. A year ago I laughed at those who lost love and said it was the worst in the world, because in all the hurts and pain how could that be the greatest? I understand now that that knife of knowing you inspired something in someone and then lost it makes the sun seem dull and your life like slavery. For all that I want, I cannot make those feelings return in you, though you have made me crave them. I cannot even make you explain. Instead you hide behind your 'I don't know's and make me feel worse in knowing im not worth enough to warrant an explanation. We talk now, trying to bring it back, and its all one sided and shallow. You say it won't work and what's the point. I know you're wrong, I know it! But I can't make you know it as I do. Perhaps what was there is just gone. Perhaps it has been gone a while, and no one heard the echo in the empty spaces until now. I guess sometimes love just dies.

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Betrayal...

Betrayal is hard pill to swallow.. It's when someone lets their true colors show..

Didn't think that you had to aim for the low blows.. But let me tell you something I do know..

Karma.. Karma is going to bite you where you least expect it.. You can't hide from it.. nor can 

you ignore it. Guess who is not going to be there when you fall this time?.. not me not in this 

time. It's your life not mine.. Dont get mine intertwinded with your mind.. If you truely cared 

about me you wouldn't have done what you did to me... I was there through everything.. Did 

that not count for something or was I just nothing?.. It's okay though because as soon as 

Karma has you in it's grasp you'll be crawling back to me and think that is that.. But you know 

what? never again.. I've given you too many chances to get better.. but as far as I'm 

concerned you are just like her.. you are no better. 

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Venting.. enjoy it! :)

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