Manic

Manic enlightenment

Movement and thoughts at the speed of light 

The others can't hold on to the train 

Not my fault 

Built different

Explain it to

Blank stares

Bad decisions

irksome stupidity

Hold breath,

Protect the light 

Shine on the inside 

Breathe...

Dumb it down, 

They don't understand 

Mediocrity is fine for them

It's their holy grail 

Don't be different 

Don't push 

Just hide

Stealth

And

defiance

I am who I am 

And I do it my way

Because it works. 

Gritted teeth

Wrapped in smiles

They don't know

A thing 

About

Being

me.

 

 

 

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Manic

I am what you would call a maniac,

A manic.

I am the Hyde to a Jekyll,

A creature with clawlike talons and razor sharp teeth.


But I am no monster of the deep,

I am simply an animal with desire, passion and love, forced

Through my veins by my ancestors.


I am no harmful creature,

But one that should be pitied.


My Body is wired,

Like an android I stand,

Helpless to my desires and instincts.


Society deems me a brute,

A monstrosity,

Yet the human species deems me perfect.


Live, Die, Breed


We are a natural process,

Subdued by societies concrete walls,

Imprisoned in ourselves,

Subverted to a nature that slaughters the souls of men.

 

 

Bring me my death, for life's meaning is massacred by the weight of suppression.

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Medicine

Folder: 
My Bi-Polar Poems

It's another day and I can't seem to find
where exactly it is I left my murky mind
due to another sleepless night
cause I failed to take my meds again last night.

It's hard to believe that others take
recreational drugs to emulate
what my brian does naturally
stuck again on a high, oh no, help me.

Being Bi-Polar means it does more than drain
but causes me at times to go a little bit insane
the intensity of my thoughts I can't escape
oh I wish I knew how to keep them in restraints.

Tonight I better take my medicine
so tomorrow I won't be lead into any type of sin
against anyone just because their there
cause chances are I wouldn't even be aware. 

Tomorrow night I hope I don't repeat
the actions that lead me into the same defeat
So I'll take my meds and get the guaranteed sleep
so my sanity I will have a chance to keep.

 

 

 

Author's Notes/Comments: 

As I've said in my profile I suffer from a mental illness known as Bi-Polar I.  I tend to go nights without sleep unless I take my sleep meds which I hate taking because they cause me to feel so groggy.  I'm in a constant battle trying to medicate my mental disease appropriately dispite myself.  I happen to like the manic episodes.  So here is an example of my inner battle thoughts.

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Manic Sleep

Folder: 
Poems

Always running into the distance
Never looking into the darkness
Dreaming awake; sleep deprived
Like an oxygen starved lung
Fending for its last fix
Darkness approaching
Eclipses shattering every moment
Into infinite shards of brilliantly
Luminescent quartz crystal
Holding a secret; a secret which is life.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Another disorderly writing.

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