In Memory

MAMA

YOU ARE THE ONE WHO BROUGHT ME TO THIS WORLD



YOURE GREAT LOVE AND AFFECTION CANNOT DESCRIBE IN A WORD



I KNOW YOU REALLY FOUGHT HARD FOR US



ID BEEN A WITNESS HOW PAINFUL IT WAS



THE BLACKSHEEP OF THE FAMILY THEY SAID



THE STUBBORN, THE HARDHEADED



YOU WERE ALWAYS MISUNDERSTOOD



CAUSE THEY NEVER LISTEN, THEY NEVER WOULD



YOU HAD LEFT AND GONE FOR SOME YEARS



WHICH BROUGHT A LOT OF TEARS



AND WHEN YOU CAME BACK IT SEEMS SO FAR AWAY



CAUSE MONEY ALONE CANNOT PAY



I MUST ADMIT I HAVE GONE MAD AT YOU



FOR YOU DONT THINK THAT I MISSED YOU TOO?



HOW I WISHED YOU NEVER LEFT AT ALL



ITS LIKE U NEVER KNEW US WHEN WERE TALL



BUT AGAIN YOU REALLY TRIED HARD ENOUGH



THOUGH LIFES FOR YOU WAS QUITE TOUGH



YOU NEVER SHOWED YOURE WEAK OUTSIDE



AND YET MAMA, YOURE BLEEDING INSIDE



GOD SPEED YOUR LIFE THAT QUICK



ITS BEEN AWHILE SINCE YOUD BEEN SICK



THERES SO MUCH WORDS LEFT UNSPOKEN



WILL I EVER SEE YOU AGAIN?



MAMA, FORGIVE US FOR THE THINGS LEFT UNDONE



SORRY THAT SOME SETTLED WHEN YOU WERE GONE



MAMA, THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR EVERYTHING



YOU WILL ALWAYS BE A GREAT BLESSING



WE WILL BE MISSING YOU OUR DEAR MOTHER



YOU NOW REST IN PEACE WITH GOD THE FATHER



YOU ARE LOVED, SWEET VERONICA



ALWAYS AND FOREVER, OUR BELOVED "MAMA"

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no more chances

He wakes up early

to see the sun rise

he opens his window

then rubs his eyes



The beauty of today

can't beat tomorrow

he cant begin to explain

his feelings of sorrow



This sunrise is amazing

it should brighten his day

Yet still he looks down

then turns to walk away



He tries to understand

what she told him that night

But all he can picture

is how he filled with fright



The tears in her eyes

shone bright like the sea

he hadn't worried then

thinking she would be free



Now he sits there wondering

why God would do this

wishing for one more time

to embrace her with a kiss



If only she was still there

to talk to and love

instead of out of this life

into the heavens above



"Maybe she found love there

somewhere up in the sky"

he finally thinks to himself

as he hangs his head to cry

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Siberian Tiger

Folder: 
Miscarriage Poems

Nicole, when you were still with me,

I did a picture of a Siberian tiger,

Underneath the picture,

I put your name.

The picture now reminds me of you.

Every time I look at that picture,

I start to cry over you,

I miss you.

I still wonder why stuff went wrong,

What I did to cause it.

You should be here,

But you’re not.

I blame myself for all kinds of things,

Not eating like I should have,

Sleeping too little,

Not listening.

In my heart is the picture I made,

See the white tiger,

So young, pure

It’s you.

My little tiger cub in heaven with God,

Angels are watching over you,

Someday I’ll be with you,

I promise, baby.

Love ya,

Mama


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My World

Folder: 
Miscarriage Poems

No one knows the pain I felt,

No one knows how I dealt,

Trying to cope with it all inside,

Because I knew my baby girl had died.



Nicole, I loved you with all my heart,

With you gone, I almost fell apart,

Daddy was there to keep me strong,

Keep me from doing things that were wrong.



I wanted to join you in heaven, you see,

But people here on earth still needed me.

Daddy would have been lost if I had gone too,

So I stayed here, though I wanted to be with you.



I didn’t want to live on when you were dead,

I wanted to die too, be shot in the head.

I miss you so much, my baby girl,

And I hope you know you were my world.

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ER Disappointment

Folder: 
Miscarriage Poems

Now is just not your time, little one

Though it seemed your life had just begun.

I've learned before about these things

Sometimes even the smallest angels get their wings.

It's difficult to know that you're still inside me

But my first child you never will be.

We will not rush to the hospital to deliver you

Around the time that I would have been due.

Daddy will not count with me as he holds my leg

"Pain Meds Please" I will not beg.

I will join you though someday, you see

When God decides to send for me.

Now is not your time, sweet little girl

But you will live on in my heart, and my world.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

I wrote this one while in the Emergency Room's waiting room. I was in the middle of a miscarriage and it helped keep me calm, for a little while.

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Heart

Remember that last moment we had?

The one where you walked away?

Tears hid behind both our eyes,

But neither had the courage to cry.

We knew then we'd never be together,

Never kiss again, or hold each other.

But human hearts hold on so tightly

That to keep from breaking, we wouldn't let it be.



So I dream of you on lonely nights

And hope and wish you someday might

Wander back along into my life

And bring me back that piece of mine you took.

The one they call my heart.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

For all those not willing to say goodbye when it seems the only choice.

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A Poet to ALL

Folder: 
Misc.

Blessings are disguised

as we've seen in the past

often in the form of talent

which many poets can have

and, they seem to effect us

so soon after they go

until then, do we notice

that God's in control

~

Craig was an Artist,

and a good friend of mine

Vibrant, and lively

he shined through his lines

grateful to have known him

for the time that I did

he was "A poet to some"

but by all He'll be missed

~

in this tragedy we share

a lesson to be learned

he was modest in his content

and  gracious in his work

you'd never see him argue

like so many of us do

instead he'd bring his smiles

when he frequented the room

~

he's left behind a mirror

and he's given to this world

his many poems of struggle

he left behind his girl

and now that he is silent

it'll echo in this room

how a poet blessed with kindness

can change our very views

~

   In Dedication to

Craig Humberger-aka-Apoettosome

       (1979-2006)

~

Rest In Peace, buddy.

We'll miss you

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RIP Steve

Folder: 
Misc.

Sometimes we forget the things

that god preserves in man

often in the form of fate

the gift of teaching hands

~

as ruler of the jungle

and an expert in his work

a dedication to a skill

that cut his life too short

~

his vibrant lively spirit

shined through all his shows

respect for dangerous creatures

which he taught the world to hold

~

and i pray for all his family

for his fans and children first

knowing Steve Irwin was a hero

a man who loved his work

~

R.I.P

The Crocodile Hunter

Steve Irwin

(1962-2006)

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Lake Of Black

Folder: 
Friends/Family

The wheel is turning, Time's gone by

It's been a year since you have died

An entire year since I've seen your face

An entire year time can't erase.



I've realized slowly I had a lot more to learn

I didn't know enough about you, as far as I'm concerned

But when you drowned in that lake of Black

A part of me died and it will never come back.



I'm waiting to cry but I know it won't come

I'll just sit here the 14th, completely numb.

I feel so foolish for reacting this way

Why can't I get over you, Robert Grey?



I shoved your memory into the back of my mind

Deciding I'd deal with it some other time

But I want you to know this; I confess

That I do not care for you any less

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Dedicated to Robert Grey, who drowned in Black Lake on August 14th, 2005. He was my friend. 2006
I really never got to say goodbye to him.

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