Fury Unleashed

poem_046_Fucked_Up_Again

What the hell is fucking wrong with me?

Is it really me or is it truly him?

And if it is why is I’m not able to see.

So I can get out of this life of grim.



Apparently I make him upset if not worse.

I find this out and I feel like shit!

I swear he makes me feel like I’m his cruse!

Why can’t he forget me and make it quit!



I’ll leave him alone if he’ll then be happy.

I’ll never think of him if this is what it takes.

If this is what it takes so he and I aren’t crappy,

Then why the fuck do we keep going through aches?



I guess all those problems of his I should have dropped.

So hey, maybe he’s tried and I pull him in.

Maybe those times he said, “nothing” I should have stopped?

So there we go…. I’ve fucked up again!



If I hadn’t of messaged him we would have avoided the complicity.

I fucked up his life, in turn fucking up mine.

I bet he was even better even with our moments of felicity.

There’s a reason for everything, so why’d our paths combine?



Gah this shit is just fucking too much too handle!

Why can’t I just make it all go away!

Just blow THIS problem away like a candle,

And make this passing in life fucking decay!



Yeah I know it’s too easy too just ‘let go’.

Every good time that ends has a fucking bad spot.

And I gotta go through it no matter how fast or slow.

I bet this one won’t go back fast… not by a long shot.



Fuck! I just wish this nightmare would fucking be done!

Wake me up and have it all just be pretend!

I wanna go back to living my life having fun!

But no it’s real life and I’m having to contend!



I’m brutally honest and I screw up his life!

I fuck it up again, and again, and again, and again!

Whooop dee doo! Once again I add to his strife!

Someone fucking kill me and put our misery to an end!





Inspired by: Gerald E. Lindberg

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Song of Questions

Why, oh Lord, didn't you save them?

I wish you would tell me.

I feel so much pain.

I can't even tell how long it's been.



I won't stop believing,

but I believe I should know

why you would spare me

and just let them go.



So much anger flows through my veins.

Besides my love for you, my family, and one other,

all I feel is hate.

I feel like a hypocrit

because I want vengeance more than any other.



Will you help me my Lord, in this quest?

I can't do this without you...not my best!

I need your help to smite those who've wronged me,

but if it's not your will, then please just let me see...

Author's Notes/Comments: 

oyyy...i write too many poems while playing DnD, LOL...this is yet another...more will come im sure.

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Defeat

The feeling inside her had over-stayed its welcome.

The time she waited was overdue.

She could not wait any longer.

She decided it was time to give her a clue,

To do what she needed to do.



All she remembered was

The rocks in her arm,

The color of her hands,

The boisterious cheer

Of all of her fans.



She wasn't surprised at what she'd done,

Until she tried to ignore

The question in her heart--

What had she done it for?



She wasn't broken,

Barely bruised or scratched-up,

Only her lip was bleeding

And her arm was cut up.



Onto the gravel she pushed her

Only to her dismay

Of losing that fight

The one she didn't start that day.



That bitch had it coming,

She told all her friends.

But unfortunately this one

Wanted to tie up loose ends.



The next morning people questioned her

The moment she arrived

She said it didn't matter,

She just felt so alive.



This one approached her

Later at school

She begged for forgiveness,

Hoping things were cool.



She wasn't falling for that,

Although it was a shocker.

Instead she took out her anger

And punched her into the locker.



Her friends gathered around

And helped when it was needed.

In the end they felt much better

Cause that bitch was finally DEFEATED.



The moral to the story?

Don't trust that bitchy friend.

They'll take your man and your happiness,

But get the blloody nose in the end.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

2/23/06..Written about how I really feel about my ex-bff.

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Thats not me.

I could get a man,

Feel complete,

Be one in the high school scene.

But no thats not me.



I should better my appearence,

Make them feel worse,

Gotta get picked first,

Thats not me.



You could open your eyes,

Let alittle light in,

Instead of drowning, try to swim,

Thats not your style

Thats not you.



You could call me up,

Pretend that you care,

Make up for old times,

When you weren't there,

But that really isn't you.



I should let my conscience go,

Not think before i act,

Not let my emotions show,

Never take you back,

Sell myself for free,

But baby that is not me.








Author's Notes/Comments: 

I had hight hopes for this one.
I was let down.

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Decree of a Determined Mind

Through night lead eyes,

I wander through nameless fears,

Through valleys of forsaken souls

And forever tormented from nightmares,

Of a broken mind never mended.



Through this, I shall prevail.

Not hindered by an imagination,

Not ready for the fall in to this world

With me I shall bring forth my soul,

uncontested, invincible.



Walking unmatched by any,

I give you this,

To and beyond all time I stand,

unwavering and unbreakable

to all those who withstand

Judgment from this world or the next,

to this I hold you in my soul.

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here today and gone tomorrow

it's here today and gone tomorrow

forced cycles of repetiton

life in the range of screens and speakers

listening to what they tell you to

watching what they want you to

and believing there is no other way



if it's in the papers, it must be true

if it's on the radio, it's what you have to listen to

it's on tv, so we have to watch

watching events unfold

but then soon enough forget

again and again

everything's here today and gone tomorrow

but aren't we all?



technology advances our society

but just as quickly tears it apart

the mass media and the mainstream

they like to shove it all down our throats

it's all a product and we're the consumers

everything's a commercial, and nothing has substance

tailor-made so it's all easier to swallow

it won't be long until we choke



it won't be too long until we never remember

our attention spans are one short fuse

living the all-american life

we'll waste away & forget ourselves

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Groupwork or Deadweight?

Group Work or Deadweight?

By Muriel Palanca



I loathe group work! I am contemptuous of group work!

I have an intense dislike sitting at my desk trying to repress a scream while other indolent people, dry of motivation, just sit there looking at me quizzically.

I hope that they physically evaporate, as their intellect has, because their initiative, drive, or need to do well has left them on an earlier train to the middle of nowhere.

I feel maltreated and abused because I have to do all the work since I’m the only one who even bothered to read the assignment of the night before.

I am the one who has to answer all the questions while my “group-mates” wait for me to finish. Of course asking them to crack open a mystical object called a textbook is out of the question.

I would much rather that they sit there and daydream about getting a higher IQ than a stop sign because that is much more productive than rotting away what little intelligence they already have.

I am not absolutely tentative about tilting their heads to the side with a futile hope that gray cerebrum somehow leaks from an opening in their heads.

Instead I sit at my desk and answer the questions with a smile on my face. If they only knew that my smile was an indicator of how much I wanted to shove my paper down their ungrateful throats.

This existing state of affairs should be denounced as it is harder to distinguish whether this is a pursuit of higher learning or whether it is just simple penance.

I wonder how Atlas felt with the weight of the world on his back.

I am feeling indignant at the thought that they are getting A’s off of my work.

I am beginning to have a vague understanding of how a water buffalo, pulling a plow in a rice paddy, feels.

Though my blood pressure is skyrocketing higher than it should, I will not assail anyone because I don’t want the words “mental case” on my permanent record.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

I wrote this as sort of a freeverse poem. I think it's pretty funny because it is like saying "You are Stupid" in so many words. I did this as an assignment for school and actually turned it in. My inspiration...I had to do group work with people who had absolutely no idea what we were doing and they didn't even try to do anything. I got an A on this assighnment...lol

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Unleashed

Enter through my head

Torturing my soul

Blast my inner life

Kill my brain



Unleash my mind

Burning you

Killing you

Realese my fury



Fuck your life

Because you fuck mine

You'll sufer when i unleash my

Fury

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I told you so 1

Folder: 
mom's poems

I told you so



I told you so

I told you

Daddy?s check

Would come

on the day it was

suppose too.



But you didn?t

Want to listen

To me or

Anything I had

To say as always

It?s like you you

Think you know

Everything about

About everybody

At times.



You said well if he don?t

Send me my money I?ll just

Call my lawyer then I bet I get

His money and a few days later

My daddy?s check on the date

It?s suppose to be here. I ask

You now what you had to say?

You knew I knew he would

Send it to me but I?m just

Use to getting it early.

Sept 3rd 2005

Author's Notes/Comments: 

i told mom daddy would send her his check

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