Today's that day..

Today's that day

a day like no other

Am I going to be happy?

Am I going to be sad?

Only time will tell..

Don't wanna go through hell..

I want to be happy

I want to be gleeful

Can you do this?

Can you help me?

I don't know what to do

I'm at a loss for words

I sit here typing..

though what am I saying?

I want to smile

no more tears

I need to wipe away

all of my fears

Things will get better

I keep telling myself

I know this is right

I'll stop putting up this fight

I'm gonna let go

I'm going to lose

Stop making me fright

I told you it's right

These voices are gone..

Time to move on..

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High in the Sky


up in the skies

up in the sky

looking p so high

don't ever ask why

just look get hooked

see the blues

see the blue

what could be more true

don't ponder, this means you

just let go

see the flow

see the clouds

see the cloud

quiet, not loud

no wondering allowed

just smile

a little while

High in the sky

never know why

head in the blue

my eyes on you

Author's Notes/Comments: 

head in the clouds again

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Thy Kingdom Numb (Prison)

Dark Poetry

Trapped within this ten by twelve

where hate, dismay, and loathing dwell.

Nothing here among the folds

the painting chipped and glowing old.

For every moment flashes by

and wastes away until it dies.

Memories begin to fade

as I drown this blue and blackened grave.

Dreams awake and kept at bay

and the rest is finally down to lay.

Pictures stare through a dirty soul

as loneliness silently tears a hole.

An empty heart beats back disdain

though rotting veins don't feel the pain.

A frantic mind revokes your truth

for trust was lost along with youth.

When innocence was shred inside

simplicity was replaced with lies.

The fall into this frozen state

was not an easy route to take.

The shards of ice, cut like glass

and incomplete is how I pass.

The time has burned a blaze in rush

of smoldered blood, that dried upon lust.

Understanding is gone with no remains

because in my existence it always rains.

In living life, I'm long since dead

but break away is where I'm led.

Screaming echoes in these walls

as clarity bellows a tempting call.

And within this prison, twelve by ten

I long for a feeling of feeling again.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

My kingdom...

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Should Not, Cannot, Will Not

Dark Poetry

I have learned, in and through life,

that there are some things I simply

cannot…will not…should not……

I should not have been born.

There would have been less pain.

There would have been less tear.

There would have been less worn.

I cannot control my depressive bouts.

I should have had more time.

I should have grown within.

I should have taken a different route.

I will not die.

I have bled my wrist.

I have felt death’s kiss.

I have nothing left inside.

I should not have tasted suicide.

I would not have felt betrayed.

I would not have given up.

I do not have time to bide.

I cannot control what I feel.

I should have taken the chance.

I should have told him.

I should know that nothing’s real.

I will not give in to you.

I can only be myself.

I can be nobody else.

I could care less if you knew.

I should not have let you take control.

I would not have fallen victim.

I would not be reduced to this.

I would not be so cold.

I cannot redeem myself.

I should not have lived for you.

I should not have died for you.

I should have loved someone else.

I will not save you…

You cannot be saved…

You’re too far astray…

But that? I already knew.

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Soul Poetry

She was drapped

in a long black billowy dress,

her matching long black hair

adorned with liquid silver strands,

her body,

adorned with turquoise jewels.

Stepping out into the night,

she breathed deep,

the scents of evening's air,

of lilacs,

wafting through the breezes.

She looked up

and there he was,

awaiting her arrival.

With a nod of soft aura beams,

he began the music

which only she could hear.

Opening her arms wide,

she swayed

and twirled to his rythym,

delighting in his midnight song.

In a voice,

meant for only her ears,

he crooned elegantly,

his passionate ballad.

As the tempo picked up,

she spun,

she twisted,

she shimmied

and froliced

in carefree

and careless movements.

She became breathless

with uninhibited delight,

pulse quickening,

hair flying

in unruly waves

and her eyes

glossy-eyed with rapture.

She moved in dizzying pace,

her feet seemingly leaving

the ground below her,

and almost weightless,

she glided upon the

atmospheric currents.

All too soon,

the cadence slowed,

the melody tapered

and the refrain subsided,

leaving her

with a longing for more.

She knew

it was always fleeting,

these times of her moon-dance.

But she knew too,

that the night

would return again,


And she would dance,

once more,


his approving

and watchful gaze.

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She Wants So Much More...

Soul Poetry

Her life is laid out before her.

She sees all she's had, has and has lost.

She longs for just a bit more.

She wonders,

'Is this it, then? All there is and will be?'

'Is there no more awaiting me, than this?'

She's happy, content and settled,

yet there's a part of her that yearns

for the as of yet, unreachable things.

She's loved and been loved,

but what is love without her dreams?

Without her even attempting to find them?

She's not saying, she's done with 'this.'

This life she now leads, she wouldn't trade.

But the desires to be more, burn inside her.

The longing to experience things different

than what has been her norm, consumes her.

To see what has always been unseeable to her eyes.

Her deep-rooted soul aches to be freed

from all which holds her back.

She needs to go forward from here.

She has so much, so much more than many,

but there's a free-spirited gypsy which resides in her,

and 'she', wants so much more.

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High on the edge of a cliff

Far above the crashing waves

A girl in a crimson dress

Sits in the spring grass

Watching the lazy sun rise.

This is her sanctuary

Do not disturb her

It is here that she can fly

Her wings heal on this ledge

Where she is free from worries and fear.

In the quiet of the dawn

She can hear her heart beating

Can hear the waves break below

Feel the breeze caress her tender skin

Soon she will have to leave this place

And return to her world of bruises

Where not only her dress is dark

She's been warned not to go out

But only here does she find peace

Hurry! Her papa will wake up soon

She's not sitting there anymore

Only the crashing waves

Know her secret now.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Did she run home?
Or did she jump off the cliff?

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Official Blahness of the Modern Society

-tired of computers but cant live without it

-tired of t.v. and shows but i live my life through it

-tired of reading but my future depends on it

-tired of air but my heart would leave me if i dont breathe it

-meaning of all this could only be that we live in frustration

-the irony of life that circles us and wont let us escape

-round and round we all go until the day

-until the day we give up what we treasure the most







Author's Notes/Comments: 

April 11th 12:52am

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Moving On

So many secrets

Bottled up inside

Shamefully concealed from sight

As if for something to hide

Running as fast as I can

Trying to escape my past

But it catches me by the hand

Pinning me down in an angry dash

The thoughts in my mind

Possess my every dream

My eyes flow with tears

Like a rapidly flooding stream

I recall these memories

Silently, my heart drops down

Not sure of what to make

Of this freedom that I've found

I made my escape and ran away

So fast, I was bound to fall

Just when I thought it was safe

I stopped, looked back and hit a wall

Author's Notes/Comments: 


When you take hold of your own life, you always fall down. I found that out the hard way (uh...more than once!)

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