up in the skies
up in the sky
looking p so high
don't ever ask why
just look get hooked
see the blues
see the blue
what could be more true
don't ponder, this means you
just let go
see the flow
see the clouds
see the cloud
quiet, not loud
no wondering allowed
just smile
a little while
High in the sky
never know why
head in the blue
my eyes on you
Trapped within this ten by twelve
where hate, dismay, and loathing dwell.
Nothing here among the folds
the painting chipped and glowing old.
For every moment flashes by
and wastes away until it dies.
Memories begin to fade
as I drown this blue and blackened grave.
Dreams awake and kept at bay
and the rest is finally down to lay.
Pictures stare through a dirty soul
as loneliness silently tears a hole.
An empty heart beats back disdain
though rotting veins don't feel the pain.
A frantic mind revokes your truth
for trust was lost along with youth.
When innocence was shred inside
simplicity was replaced with lies.
The fall into this frozen state
was not an easy route to take.
The shards of ice, cut like glass
and incomplete is how I pass.
The time has burned a blaze in rush
of smoldered blood, that dried upon lust.
Understanding is gone with no remains
because in my existence it always rains.
In living life, I'm long since dead
but break away is where I'm led.
Screaming echoes in these walls
as clarity bellows a tempting call.
And within this prison, twelve by ten
I long for a feeling of feeling again.
I have learned, in and through life,
that there are some things I simply
cannot…will not…should not……
I should not have been born.
There would have been less pain.
There would have been less tear.
There would have been less worn.
I cannot control my depressive bouts.
I should have had more time.
I should have grown within.
I should have taken a different route.
I will not die.
I have bled my wrist.
I have felt death’s kiss.
I have nothing left inside.
I should not have tasted suicide.
I would not have felt betrayed.
I would not have given up.
I do not have time to bide.
I cannot control what I feel.
I should have taken the chance.
I should have told him.
I should know that nothing’s real.
I will not give in to you.
I can only be myself.
I can be nobody else.
I could care less if you knew.
I should not have let you take control.
I would not have fallen victim.
I would not be reduced to this.
I would not be so cold.
I cannot redeem myself.
I should not have lived for you.
I should not have died for you.
I should have loved someone else.
I will not save you…
You cannot be saved…
You’re too far astray…
But that? I already knew.
She was drapped
in a long black billowy dress,
her matching long black hair
adorned with liquid silver strands,
her body,
adorned with turquoise jewels.
Stepping out into the night,
she breathed deep,
the scents of evening's air,
of lilacs,
wafting through the breezes.
She looked up
and there he was,
awaiting her arrival.
With a nod of soft aura beams,
he began the music
which only she could hear.
Opening her arms wide,
she swayed
and twirled to his rythym,
delighting in his midnight song.
In a voice,
meant for only her ears,
he crooned elegantly,
his passionate ballad.
As the tempo picked up,
she spun,
she twisted,
she shimmied
and froliced
in carefree
and careless movements.
She became breathless
with uninhibited delight,
pulse quickening,
hair flying
in unruly waves
and her eyes
glossy-eyed with rapture.
She moved in dizzying pace,
her feet seemingly leaving
the ground below her,
and almost weightless,
she glided upon the
atmospheric currents.
All too soon,
the cadence slowed,
the melody tapered
and the refrain subsided,
leaving her
with a longing for more.
She knew
it was always fleeting,
these times of her moon-dance.
But she knew too,
that the night
would return again,
tomorrow.
And she would dance,
once more,
underneath
his approving
and watchful gaze.
Her life is laid out before her.
She sees all she's had, has and has lost.
She longs for just a bit more.
She wonders,
'Is this it, then? All there is and will be?'
'Is there no more awaiting me, than this?'
She's happy, content and settled,
yet there's a part of her that yearns
for the as of yet, unreachable things.
She's loved and been loved,
but what is love without her dreams?
Without her even attempting to find them?
She's not saying, she's done with 'this.'
This life she now leads, she wouldn't trade.
But the desires to be more, burn inside her.
The longing to experience things different
than what has been her norm, consumes her.
To see what has always been unseeable to her eyes.
Her deep-rooted soul aches to be freed
from all which holds her back.
She needs to go forward from here.
She has so much, so much more than many,
but there's a free-spirited gypsy which resides in her,
and 'she', wants so much more.
High on the edge of a cliff
Far above the crashing waves
A girl in a crimson dress
Sits in the spring grass
Watching the lazy sun rise.
This is her sanctuary
Do not disturb her
It is here that she can fly
Her wings heal on this ledge
Where she is free from worries and fear.
In the quiet of the dawn
She can hear her heart beating
Can hear the waves break below
Feel the breeze caress her tender skin
Soon she will have to leave this place
And return to her world of bruises
Where not only her dress is dark
She's been warned not to go out
But only here does she find peace
Hurry! Her papa will wake up soon
She's not sitting there anymore
Only the crashing waves
Know her secret now.
-tired of computers but cant live without it
-tired of t.v. and shows but i live my life through it
-tired of reading but my future depends on it
-tired of air but my heart would leave me if i dont breathe it
-meaning of all this could only be that we live in frustration
-the irony of life that circles us and wont let us escape
-round and round we all go until the day
-until the day we give up what we treasure the most
-inhale
-exhale
-embrace
-release
-live
-life
So many secrets
Bottled up inside
Shamefully concealed from sight
As if for something to hide
Running as fast as I can
Trying to escape my past
But it catches me by the hand
Pinning me down in an angry dash
The thoughts in my mind
Possess my every dream
My eyes flow with tears
Like a rapidly flooding stream
I recall these memories
Silently, my heart drops down
Not sure of what to make
Of this freedom that I've found
I made my escape and ran away
So fast, I was bound to fall
Just when I thought it was safe
I stopped, looked back and hit a wall
Escapism, a feeling, a meaning, too fabulous to rightfully write about.
But I'll take my liberties.
It owns the mind and body,
It's awake when you're at rest.
The heart beats on,
as closed eyes flutter.
rapidly running onward.
you dream of flying, soaring; falling.
even the falling is pure ecstasy.
the twistedness is the feeling of security,
the fall will be broken, and not all your bones.
The wind and the clouds are companions to boot
they revel in the elan that they pass on to you
the swoosh of the noises and the breeze in your hair,
nothing can corrupt this world of no cares.
ignorant bliss emits through the space
the space with no boundaries; the time that has stopped
your problems are spirited away
you want to *get* away.
the air is clean
the buzzing has stopped,
your escape will come soon,
If you dream the simple dream.