Intro to Nostalgia

Can't let go of the past
can't help but think,
if I had turned right instead of left
what the outcome would be

I'm not learning, I'm yearning
for something that once was
for something that could have been
I messed up

Dwelling in my sorrow,
knowing that there's no tomorrow
I hate what I have become
totally undone

Can't get it right
no need to fight
thinking of what I might
time to turn out the light
can't get a bite
not even a fight
nothing seems bright

This pain,
is definitely not a gain
it hurts,
like I'm being eaten from the inside out

being numb
doesn't mean I have to be a bum
or better yet a scum

can't embrace, won't embrace
what's to become

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My Name is...


You come to me

when sky is grim

we talk for hours

nothing but him


Empty boulevard

streetlights lit

I’ll brace your fall

indeed I did


When time for me

you were there

without complaint

cleared the air


flash forward a bit

I miss those lips

I know it’s wrong

but I value the trip


Wish it were different

and yet I know

never the same

out of my control


Nostalgia never lies

but tonight

I will sing her a lullaby.

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The trip back home


I miss the hazy sunsets

And the mayhem on the roads

Impatient drivers through security checks

Short-tempered pedestrians

I took a trip back home

With my fears

And reservations uncalled for

I tread carefully

Cautious to the core

I looked at things with mixed feelings

But it all changed

With in matter of days

What was it that changed it all?

I do not know

The water, the sweet smell of soil

The people

The invisible bond

Of growing up

I am torn

Between then and now

I miss the cold evenings

And the dim lit streets

I miss the faces

I called my own

I love the place for what it is

I miss Pakistan

It hurts

Author's Notes/Comments: 

The recent trip to Pakistan was full of apprehensions and uncalled for fears. It was wonderful. Loved it.

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by: Joel Faypon
December 22, 2004

The sound of thousand cars
     cruising down the freeway -  
It reminds me of how fast the years go
     how quickly they slip away

Age can be defeating sometimes,
     especially when it flashes back -
The thought of how much I wasted
My life, my love
And how much you have wasted
Your life, my love

The airport has this calming scent
     that reminds me of how long I was away -
And that I should have gone back to you,
And that I should have stayed

My vision is leaving me.
I do not see things sharply anymore
And images flow in a maze -
     lights are but a mere splatter of colors,
     foreground to a haze

But the memories are clear to see -
     and how far I strayed away
From you,
From peace
And how far you strayed away
From me,
From all these

It has been ages but I still wonder about the reasons
     why our lives crossed
But all is clear to me now
That I have absorbed the shock
    and have accepted that I lost

But I am not sad because of it
I am not sad because of this defeat
I am not sad about myself like
     you have probably heard.
I am sad for you
For them
And I am sad for the world...


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Back Again



It's been two years since
I came here last. I am so



Today, It's a bright, sunny
May day. And I am here to
breath nature's beauty; to
watch these glad birds take
off and land smooothly on

the silent glittering lake in
Handsome Hermance's hand!


The lake ripples.
Excitment in my blood.
Sun rays form golden patterns
of blue and grey on the lake.
Beauty is born before my
excited eyes. Glory!
Peace in my soul.
Gratefulness to God who
made all that I see.


The lake ripples.
Still, excitement in my blood.
I am born anew in God's brilliant
beauty of the welcoming spirit -
His breathtaking creation!


The grass is green
and lush. On it I rest
my longing feet; and then, feel
nature's loving caress refresh
my little whole being.


Here I am, once again,
after all these years!
Excitment in my blood.
Peace in my soul!


Here I am once again, Lord:
back to nature; back to you;
just back again.
And You have strengthened
me for the life and
journey ahead.
This new day.  


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