Reflection of your Soul


ThoughtShock: A manifesto
"Reflection of your Soul"

I have looked into the eyes of despair. I have even sat at the table sharing a meal with temptation to my left. Desire on my right and sin straight across from me. Lust passes me the plate and I see they have prepared my favorite cuisine; Obsession with the side of addiction.
As each of the little small often white or yellow pills slide down my throat it's not long before I can feel the blood in my veins become dosed. The ego within me slips into a coma, as the last thought of an emotional mind. “No more pain, no more suffering. As I aim to medicate the brain.”

Why must I endure these horrific thoughts. Constantly being tortured by my own mind. Sickos, perverts becoming prey for the deviants. Where death in this sadistic twisted freak show known as a theater is just the icing on the cake. The door to hell was left wide open in my head. Visions of the blood feud orgies, it is a family tradition after all. There are no limits. No age restrictions, as even a baby can enter in this circus. Madhouse of derangement.
Why must it cling? A snake coiling around its dinner. Suffocating and strangling the last bit of air from it's lungs. SNAP, and there goes it's neck. There is a method to my madness. A secret to the carnival. I write, to sort the chaos and to serve as an echo to what little sanity is left in this dieing world. I self medicate in a vast array of narcotics, a cocktail of drugs to keep me numb. To keep me calm, a chemical meditation without having to focus, and where I have become a junkie to my own disease.

I am tired of feeling like I am the crazy one, when in reality it is this very illusion I am witnessing that is mad. Like Alice I have slipped down a hole into some parallel universe where nothing makes sense. It gets harder and harder for me to organize the chaos in my head. Sometimes I wonder given the chance if my brain would put a gun to its self. I catch myself wanting to burst out screaming at odd moments, random places, not for me however. Where I just want to slap the stupidity from your head yet I know that would not solve anything other then making me feel slightly better. A little more of myself dies inside as I realize there just might not be any hope to be had until it is to late. A truly self absorbed, depraved species we have evolved into.
While bathed in sin, you preach and promote violence and hate. Conditioned by entertainment to be cruel and sadistic. Then to top it all off, we present to you an all you can eat buffet of drugs and sex. Pimped out teachers preparing your child for this paradise, this beautiful grotesque reflection into our own souls. We do not need the Antichrist, for we already sold ourselves to the devil in hopes of keeping this dream alive.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

I compiled this piece last night on christmas eve, however decided to wait until today to post it. Not much to comment about on this one honestly, but hope you enjoy it.

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hurtandlost's picture

damn. this is good.

damn. this is good. your writing is like a drug.

MatthewWayne's picture

:) again thank you, always

:) again thank you, always love hearing feedback on my writing... but wow never had my writing compared to a drug before now that is an honor!! :D

"I am my own sort of strange, a supernova of madness and brillance. Forced to share the same space and time. Sane enough to not be seen, yet not crazy enough to be heard." -- Matthew Wayne

SSmoothie's picture

Powerful!i like the wake up

Powerful!i like the wake up call... Profound and the baby bit very disturbing! In awe, shock, horror and too aware! Cheers and merry Christmas!

Don't let any one shake your dream stars from your eyes, lest your soul Come away with them! -SS    

"Well, it's life SIMS, but not as we know it" - ¡$&am