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Glitch
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--2013 (RECENT) Poems I'm sorry,
If sometimes I sound
And act like
I'm pushing you away.
I'm not scared
Of losing anything...
I didn't need
Anyone...
My life has no
Greater meaning
Until I met you.
It's just that I'm beginning
To love you beyond
I've ever felt before,
Beyond I ever thought
I could,
And it scares the hell
Out of me.
It scares me
Because I have a glitch-
The one you know of.
Some time in the past,
I've allowed myself
To love -
Unconditionally...
And though I know
You are different
And THIS is incomparable,
Loving too much
Triggers the me that was
Hurt too much
And when it happens,
Something inside of me
Shuts off.
And I get scared,
And I try to fight it off,
Pretending I'm okay
When I'm not.
Worse, in defense,
I foolishly build
This stupid wall,
Made of silly words-
Between us.
Wall of words
To gather courage
That I'm ready for
Anything
Because you and
Your happiness,
Mean everything
To me.
A wall I built,
As if I didn't know
That the warmth
Of your love and
The gentleness
Of your heart
Can see and pierce
Through it.
You know me better.
That I was dying
To be rescued.
You're still there
Unmoved, unshaken.
Hurt...
But waiting, patiently
With open arms-
For me.
I'm so, so, soooooooo very sorry.
If I sound
And act like
I'm pushing you away.
More than anything,
Despite my glitch,
Please...stay.
