# relationships #alone #depression #sad #lonely #pain #tears #waiting

Do you know that feeling

 

Do you know that feeling
when your lost inside of being lost.
When the black veil bares down
blinding your view on life
a empty black void in its place

When your soul is chained naked
to a cold hard brick wall.
with life joyfully breathing
its icy... cold... breath
chilling you to your very core

When the loneliness you feel
can not be quenched
by the love of someone u know
and their words don't make it through
the veil cloaked around you

Time slips through your fingers
like sand fleeing from your grasp.
Your mind darker and more frightful
than a midnight woodland
where the moon and stars are gone
and razor clawed demons do dwell

When it feels like two mighty dragons
are battling to the death
inside your very chest
and your left to belly crawl over
the blackened grass of despair.

Do you know that feeling?

Don't you see?

  Don't think you are the only one thats held a gun to their head.

Stared off into space, reasoning in your head.

 

  No im not ok. You left me for dead.

Don't come back around here, there is nothing but regrets.

 

  Maybe i was the fool, who fell for you. The pun line in your silly little joke.

We never learn how to love. We really just sin.

 

  I'm sorry, are you happy now? That you've broke me. 

Did you win your happiness back? Since all i did was bring you down.

 

 Building my hope again, this time not for you.

 

 All i have left is me, and thats far better then you.

 

Author's Notes/Comments: 

its not my best but i kinda like it.

Should Have Been Me

My eyes and their hurtful lies

Showing me a familiar face

But I know this is one they never truly knew

And though from afar

These eyes of mine

Affixed to this face in my likeness I now see

As sure as the day is long

This face I see never desired to know me

 

And though you don’t see from where you stand

I speak to you aloud as if you can

You’re that carbon copy of a man

The original author of me

Who owns all my features

Your only job to do what she couldn’t

To enlighten and make this boy a man

But I no longer obsess with why you wouldn’t

 

Because now it’s too late

I’m already broken

As a child, instead of with you I sat hoping

And threw my ball against a loveless wall

While you were on the first train smokin’

You

So unwilling

And I

Your unworthy seed

Regrettably stamped with your miserable seal

You’ve been a regular collector of dust in my mind’s projector

And the primary reason I no longer feel

 

So now

As I see your disloyal smile

Wide as the Nile

Holding what I can only assume the hand of your replacement child

I convince myself to let go and live free

But this fever in my heart will make a troublesome fresh start

Just knowing

That should have been me

 

Copyright © 2014 by Daryl R. Gaines. All rights reserved

 

 

 

 

 

Author's Notes/Comments: 

No boy should have to grow up without a father. And it's unfair to expect a woman to turn a boy into a man 

After Eight Years


I still remember of you even though you betrayed 
Myself with someone who was evil from the inside 
But from the outside I truly named him best friend. 

After eight years I spent the nights who seems more 
Darker and full of looniest after I used to watch from 
Your eyes a shine bright moon in the middle of the night. 

The blood that flows in my veins now flow with a huge 
Pain that seems more like a Cancer, after you donated 
Your own blood to my body who was like a feather of bird. 

I thread my mouth so I won't hurt you with any words that 
Might break our love that almost stayed for one year and 
A half, as well so I won't be flirting with my poems to others. 

I confused to the whole world that I loved you more than it should 
Only because you Kept feeding me with the taste of parting 
That I would never thought of doing such a think to you. 

After eight years I still feel missing some unseen pains and wounds 
The tear in my eye seem more like a candle wax that can't be remove 
In my chest heartburn can never be shut off only if I can forget you both 
Dirty game that really need a big award from my broken heart. 

2/1/2013 

My best friend

Pain is my friend. 

It lets me know Im alive

It lets me know what is real and what is fake

it lets me know when I've loved too much

Or when I haven't been loved enough

sometimes it hits hard and fast

and leaves just as quickly

other times it come slow and lingers

but it is always there

waiting for Me

 

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