Questioning

Blinded

When I am defensive
what is it I defend
is it real?
Am I in alliance with illusion?

Do I dare venture further
No longer do I care to be
a denizen of a limited mind
is there anything to find
am I blind....

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Who Do You Think You Are?

Folder: 
Questions

Who do you think you are?
Taking my heart and tearing it apart,
and leaving it covered with scars.

Who do you think you are?
Coming around and into my life,
and stabbing me in the heart with your knife.

Who do you think you are?
Doing what you want, and hurting as you please,
acting like you are the bee's knees.

Who do you think you are?
Treating me like a slave,
oh my, aren't you brave!

Just who do you think you are?
I'm not sure but there's something I know,
you're not someone I'll ever want to be with.

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What do I do?

Folder: 
My thoughts

I'm so confused,
Why did I come outside?

Oh, I think I remember,
I was looking for my friend.

We are supposed
to met up today.

It's so cold,
I have to find my friend.

This lady has stopped,
and is guiding me to her car.

She and her children ask me,
"Are you okay? What are you doing outside?"

"I'm looking for my friend,
I don't know where she is." I tell them.

I'm so cold,
the younger girl is sitting beside me.

She takes my hands in hers,
she's warming my hands.

The woman drives around,
looking for my friend.

I ask them where they live,
they live up the street.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

This is a poem I wrote from the perspective of this old lady my mother, my sister, and I saw who was freezing cold, and stumbling around. She said she couldn't find her friend. It was freezing on this night, and we call the police. The lady didn't know how old she was. She had alzhiemers. Poor lady!

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Is there something wrong with me?

Folder: 
My thoughts

Is there something wrong with me?
Why is it that I'm not like anyone else?
Is there something wrong with me?
Am I some kind of freak?

I'm a girl who isn't crazy
about being in the know
when it comes to clothes,
or even when it comes to makeup.

Is there something wrong with me?
Why is it that I'm not like anyone else?
Is there something wrong with me?
Am I some kind of freak?

Why is it that I like to knit and crochet?
Some people tell me it's an old lady hoby.
That doing it at my age is just plain wierd.
Is that statement really true?

Is there something wrong with me?
Why is it that I'm not like anyone else?
Is there something wrong with me?
Am I some kind of freak?

How come I don't like alot of
the things that other girls do?
Why is it that my interests
are alot different than other girls my age?

Is there something wrong with me?
Why is it that I'm not like anyone else?
Is there something wrong with me?
Am I some kind of freak?

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Just a little poem about the questioning of who I am and whether it's wierd that I'm so different.

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Too Phase

Folder: 
My Name is...

There is an issue I cannot resolve
In my head.
I feel the scorch and feel the frost.

Chased the eastern ray, but I was lost
In the west.
You used to radiate light so bright.

Anticipate that you would give me light,
I was wrong.
Your cold look locked me in the dungeon.

Can’t read your mind and I’m low on patience.
I need to know!
At last, I’ll ask, “why is this so?”

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Questions

Folder: 
2001

Why do I deserve

All this pain I have?

 

How come everything

Makes the pain so much worse?

 

Is there no way at all

For my pain to leave?

 

Why can’t I seem to get help

When I need it most?

 

Is there something wrong

With the things I do?

 

Do I honestly and truly

Deserve to eat this cake?

 

All I really want to know

Is, why choose me?

 

~Chrystal

Written on

January 14, 2001

Author's Notes/Comments: 

This one was written to my parents. If they knew about how many poems I had written about them, they'd be appalled . Right now they think tat all my poems were about boyfriends, well I am here to tell them that they are wrong.

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Why

Folder: 
Thinking.....

Why?

Why me?
Why now?
Why the pain?
Why the suffering?
Why today?
Why yesterday?
Why am I still here?
Why is he still here?
Why did you do it?
Why did you pick me?
Why torture?
Why forever?
Why me?
Why now?

Why?
 

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