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Loneliness

By jfarrell

It’s not about people,

Or numbers of people;

You spend time with hundreds of people everyday,

Some of them the same people…..

But,

When you can’t connect… make a link… a spark….

People I’ve known 20 years are as connected

As people I see on tv or films….

To me, that is.

I stop the film, the tv show….

I go home from work…

These people just cease to exist

Until tomorrow,

When I see them again.

Loneliness is about not connecting with people….

And, what is ‘connecting with people’…..?

I don’t know how to define that….

I assume it’s an ‘emotional’ connection….

“We got a spark between us, we have.”

That’s emotional, right?

Or just old corny chat up lines?

When you think of ‘mum’ or ‘dad’….

There’s an emotional element to it?….

Love?…. loyalty?…..

I have a mum I hate;

A sister I still won’t see after nearly 36 years;

And recently said goodbye,

To the only “friends” I had.

To have ‘connected’….

With someone…..

Ever….

It’s not about people;

It’s about connecting with people.

And I don’t know how to connect.