Critically Aware

The fastest i've ever given up 

multiplied by the amount of times

I've been afraid to try

if it were a weight?

Like a neutron star

Probably

Quite the tingle down my leg

When i'm anxious

I get tensed up and a pain radiates

Down through to my ankle bone

Zaps me like I'm a bug

I feel like a bug

When I see myself in the mirror

After hours of thinking about

What I'm going to do next

Am I antisocial now?

Have I forgotten how to be?

I notice my interactions aren't so keen

These days

I notice myself looking away

It's not ok

I want friends but

Finding parking is such a hassle

And I can only handle

One or two events a day

The rest I stay, stare at screens of

Varying sizes until the sun sets &

The five stars you can see from

My yard start to give off their barely

visible glow

So faint, that's how a city makes you feel

If you let it get to you

Anyway

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lyrycsyntyme's picture

Powerful

"The five stars you can see from

My yard start to give off their barely

visible glow

So faint, that's how a city makes you feel

If you let it get to you"

 

Having grown up in a big city, I not only fully get the "five stars" reference, I know that the sentiments you express - "so faint, that's how a city makes you feel.." - are ones that quite a few friends and acquaintances experienced. The way you make the comparison, with even such majestic and raging sources of light as stars being all but drowned out in the city, is the peak point of what is a fantastic poem, end to end.

 

I only wish to have come across this sooner. It's an instant favorite.