Vent

You're Five Times Better Than I'll Ever Be

She's in her lonesome unity,

Then the feeling looms just like a tree.

Look in her mind; it says "listen to me"

"They're so much better than I'll ever be

They're so much better than I'll ever be

They're five times better than I'll ever be."


The two of you, you look so free.

You're everything that I wanna be.

Look in her eyes and then you'll see;

"You're so much better than I'll ever be

You're so much better than I'll ever be

You're five times better than I'll ever be."


She wants your love, not your pity.

She'd balance her laptop on her knee.

She's sure she's thinking foolishly;

"You're five times better than I'll ever be

You're five times better than I'll ever be

You're so much better than I'll ever be."


She uses up her mind and draws it.

She thinks it is her only asset.

Her value is what she'll produce;

Without her skills, she is no use,

And lacking words, she is no use.

She's suffered but her mind's abuse.

 

She wants to see the light,

But she gives up before the fight.

 

Collapsed within its irony,

(Her states swim alternatingly)

So that she really does believe

 

You're so much better than she'll ever be

You're so much better than she'll ever be

You're so much better than she'll ever be.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Just a vent.

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I Need to Vent

Palms 37:4 ESV

"Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart."
 
This year I have been craving adventure and traveling. I have always had the desire to go to Spain and study abroad during college; but college is so far away. I want to go now but I know the reason why I can't go now is because I'm not ready. I'm not ready to go out of the country. I'm not ready to get on a plane for the first time and by myself. I'm not ready to be on my own. I'm just not prepared. I see all these people from school going on trips even around the country that seem so amazing to me. They go to the mountains, the ocean, or even a cottage. 
I want to go. I want to get out of my comfort zone and just have fun. Meet new people. I need to get out. 
I'm not ungrateful I just need a change. I want to see the world. That may scare some people but I want to go. I want to slow down and take in the scenery and not stress about pleasing others and standards. 
I want to find myself. Because here I'm not me. I don't feel like I'm living up to my full potential. God has bigger plans for me and they're not fulfilled here. 
I don't know what's going on. My feelings have never been this strong before. Maybe God's working in me I don't know. I just need to figure it out. I want a plan. But I have to wait.
Everyone wants to travel but do I have the guts to actually do it? I hope so! 
Author's Notes/Comments: 

I know this isn't a poem but I just needed to get it out. Maybe someone will actually listen out there.

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