# #Love #Relationship #Loss #Hope #Sadness #God #Heaven #Lyrics #Poem #Song #Piano Ballad #Poetry

Once I had no fear and nothing to lose.

 

Imagination wild with dreams
and A happy childhood so it seems
From a young age my future was set
Then tragedy and our family met
Dad had taken fate in to his own control
By deciding when to end his life role
It’s seen as a selfish act by some
I think he was brave to use that gun
But he left me and mum to fend for ourselves
Hardship soon followed ……a living hell
Wednesday the fifth the day dad chose
It’s now thirteen years later when more grief arose
Mum has died suddenly and so quick
She passed away too on, Wednesday the fifth
Is it coincidence or is it fate?
Their deaths have shared the same day and date.
my future is changed now you are both gone
but this life does not stop for me or no one
I must continue I must proceed
Both your guidance and support I need
I don’t have a plan, no dreams to chase
I will just leave it up to the hands of fate
I hope that the cards that I’m now dealt
Will make me happy and serve me well

 

Author's Notes/Comments: 

This is dedicated to my parents whom have both passed away.

Just let me grieve

The fondness and affection which I always came to give,
Has now gone away, simply ceases to exist,
My mind is now contained by a deep and heavy mist-
Cant concentrate on others, nothing more I have to give,
My troubles are now amplified as I proceed to live
My sister stopped me grieving pushing to sell my home,
Her deep seated bitterness is apparent in her tone
Making plans behind my back which has caused me much dismay
Her plans of spending money that will eventually come her way
I don’t feel the security of having family now
The sister connection ended and now one I wont allow
Sick of the pretence and conversation hiding what should be said
Her only ability to understand real life came from something that she read
Dad is no longer with this world neither is my mother
Before mum and I could always rely on one another.
I fear the inner dark thoughts that remain from my losses
Morbidly aware we all bare our crosses
its all out of my control which invokes Hatred I feel
the explosion of uncontrollable feelings are real
fine line breaks quickly between love and hate
am I now on the right path written from fate?
past relationships were fickle I falsely gave love to all
ive created a callous inner wall, scared I cant love and alone I feel
only enjoying intoxication to mask what is real
Life teaches lessons that are not written anywhere
Choices decisions and mistakes are ours to bear
Endlessly trying to focus my attention to hope
To remain so strong and continue to cope

Loss

You lived your life, now you’ve passed away Cremated with nothing left to decay

Grief endlessly lingers more so some days, eternal peace for your soul I do pray.

I have had to begin the process of change

Our home we once shared I've kept just the same

 I'm now coming to terms your never coming home

 My realisation is I have to  live on alone.

My mind needs to focus on something other than sorrow

 Just get through today and find strength for tomorrow

I also kept your belongings the same; just so I have now decided its the time to let go

A change with these surroundings is needed for me

 Things have been left for you- its just not healthy

 I'm surrounded by items that prevent me to heal

A fresh start to ease the loss and sorrow I feel I've selected items that remind me of you

It’s a sad, hard process I have to see through

To box up and give away the remaining pieces you once owned- Pictures, books and

ornaments to belong in someone else's home.

 Its time to start another chapter that’s new

Rebuild and proceed to live life without you

Precious keepsakes will remain in my possession

Reminding me to embrace this life & heal with succession

 I wrote this for you mum, if ever you are watching over

Just like your poem said ‘enjoy living in clover’

Also you wrote… ‘live in the present, the past is long dead’

 And i’ll  try hard to live by the points you once said

I will always believe there’s a life beyond this

For the departed loved ones we so truly miss.

 

Author's Notes/Comments: 

This is dedicated to my mother who passed away in 2013

To Mum

If time is a healer when will it become easier?

I long for your presence I want you here with me

 I sense you spirit but cannot see

The day that you left this world behind

 A piece of my being died inside

Theres an empty hole left behind

 Heartache and sorrow are entwined

In every action thought and feeling I have

A big part is missing since you passed

A vial piece is now missing at home

When I enter the house and im all alone

You were my constant my rock my mother my friend

 On you I did lean on, on you id depend

I do not feel the need to lay flowers to signify loss

 Everyday your in my thoughts and never forgot

You suddenly passed and was taken away

Eternal peace for your soul I do pray

I hope you know how much I loved you

You are missed so much that much is so true.

 

 

 

Coming home

When I went away, You remained at home
I’m sorry I left you all alone
There was one guarantee
That I always Knew that when I came home
I came home to you
You were my constant, my rock
My mother and friend
On you I did leaned on, I could always depend
The day that you left this world behind
A piece of my being died inside
I still can’t believe that you are now gone
I try really hard to remain all strong
I had so many plans and things we could do
Now I must live on, live on without you
I never got to say goodbye
I didn’t expect it…I suppose that’s why
The last time I saw you we had fun where we went
now a cherished memory of the time that we spent.

 

Author's Notes/Comments: 

this is dedicated to my mother

Grief

It's hard to grasp grief when it does come?
Different for all when losing someone
It never came on the day that you died
Or following weeks that passed on by
When your body was gone and turned into ashes
Grief remained distant and I stayed distracted
Distraction from sinking alone in own thoughts
Trying so hard to not be so distraught
I felt it today it hit me so hard
Grief flowed through my impermeable guard
The guard that keeps the pain at bay
The guard that pushes tears away
It was then I broke and realised your gone
Not coming back I’ve lost someone
I hope you rest peacefully and that your soul is free
When the time comes you will be waiting for me.

 

Mum

A life of living,
A life of loss
A life of giving,
A life that lost
Lasting memories
A life adhered
Enjoyment gathered in
Younger years
To all who knew a beautiful kind
Caring, sharing an intelligent mind
Now at peace
Now she sleeps
Her soul now gone
Beyond our reach
Sleep peacefully now mum
I now say goodbye
With hope of resting peace as you lie

 

Mum missing from home

There just aren't enough words for me to describe
How much you are missed and how much I now cry
A vital piece is now missing at home
When I enter the house and I'm all alone
When you were there and I had been away
It never mattered when or what day
I could always rely on you to be there
To listen to my stories of fun and despair
Coming home to you I could always depend
Confiding in you; more so than my friends
I regret past times when we fought and lost sight-
Of what really mattered when we used to fight.
The bad memories i have are really hard to forget
Any unpleasant times cause me much regret
We did have the good times which I’ll always remember
I love you and miss you I will do forever.

 

Author's Notes/Comments: 

I lost my mother in 2013 this is dedicated to her.

Mum not in this life

There’s an empty hole Left behind
Heartache and sorrow are entwined
In every action, thought and feeling I have
A big part is missing since you have passed
Sadness tainting memories with lost hope
Externally showing to all I can cope
To be true to myself I allow myself time
Whist I dwell on the past or write out a rhyme
Thinking over the Times that I would change
A thought keeps me going although it is strange
I concentrate hard on all you endured
That you were surviving life: you weren’t for this world
In this life you had given all that you had
and lost so much more especially dad
Without dad you couldn’t live life as intended …..
To continue forward with a mind and soul mended
I pray that now you have reached your eternal resting place
And its filled with everything life wasn't and its easier to take

 

 

Author's Notes/Comments: 

I lost my mother in 2013 this is dedicated to her.