Sleep Deprivation

Desperate for an end
Particularly for this wasted time
Sitting here with empty thoughts
Debating on my crime

I come to a conclusion
As well as I have come to many
Looking for truth or insight
Or for something of which there are not many

I bled
I looked
I cried
I wondered
I dabbled through my mind
I found that there is nothing left
For nothing gets left behind

I'm convinced I'm lying to myself
And hopefully I believe
For if not I could destroy myself
Before I even leave

This thing that feeds on me
Gnawing and preventing sleep
Is merely just a phase, a weakness,
a joke
I will survive for I believe

So goodbye dear friend
Goodbye to you too stranger
For you I no longer have use
I only have myself to trust
To hold on to
And to love

But this will not be the last of me
For soon I will return
I may appear the same
I may not
I will leave that for you to discern

Author's Notes/Comments: 

A poem I wrote early one sleepless night, soon before I left.

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palewingedpoetess's picture

First off, welcome to our big little community of poets.........

Is lovely but a bit vague, not sure if you mean it by sleep, a lost love, a mistake you made or perhaps even addiction of some time and you are going away to take care of that. Other than the vagueness of the subject matter i was well constructed. The best two lines of the whole poem I felt was the follow
So goodbye dear friend
Goodbye to you too stranger

I felt it's like you thought you knew this person but really don't and I take it to be you but perhaps it is someone you feel you have lost due to some not fully revealed circumstances. I hope writing this helped you alleviate whatever was torturing your thoughts. Thank you for sharing, Sincerely, Melissa Lundeen.