T.R.O.Y. (The Ruins Of You)

Folder: 
Confessions

I stand in the ruins of you
carrying the casket
of the memories of us
Once, 
a cradle of holy affection and love.
Here lie the shattered 8 months
of unison prayers, 
jeepney banters,
subtle, orgasmic whispers,
the euphoria of meeting your mother,
and the dreams we built 
on midnight kisses and sacred moans.

The pen you gave me
still holds
its allegiance to you
refusing to spill its ink
thriving on its own will
I grapple it by its neck
and watch it slowly faint.

Lonely hearts from the start,
we relished the thought of a lasting love.
Two candles burn
when two lovers pray.
On our very first date,
I cursed on how you made me wait.
On our very last day,
I prayed that He would make you stay.
People say first impressions last
But you had me only at second glance.

Sober fools in a clandestine night
we laughed and walked for hours and miles
You, holding my bag
Me, holding your hand.
This was before his ghost haunted you
again
alive and well.
This was before in between hours,
you’d forget my whispers
and long for his.
This was before your friend 
called me to say,
“Just let him go. Love is not supposed
to work this way.”

The dark clouds came
and never left.

I stand in the ruins of you,
claws clutching to the ground,
eyes beaten and tired,
feet still shackled 
with the ropes you gave me last June
and every inch of them is an untold story
and each story is a blow to my head.
Love is but a slowly unfolding agony.
Knot
after
knot,
I untangle these shackles I tied myself to.
Knot
after
knot,
I begin to remember 
the life I built around you and me,
the dreamy kisses,
the day I met your friends and family,
the night I got so drunk
you had to forget our fight
to come and get me,
the night you got so drunk
you had to forget our fight
to say you still love me.
But the high wasn’t worth the agony
of knowing that at my lowest point,
confined in a hospital,
covered with punctures,
you successfully abandoned me;
of carrying a bleeding heart every day
and hoping it won't leak;
of feeling the sands of time slip
away from your grasp,
along with all your hope and chance;
of finally choosing to live through hell
hoping that your lover would remember
the warmth of an earthly heaven
you built for yourselves and once lived in.
of knowing that the memory of us
would later turn to dust
and I am to collect them
with bare hands.
Knot
after
knot,
The walls of this temple begin to shatter
I am no longer your prisoner.
I stand in the ruins of you,
claws clutching
on crumpled bed sheets,
rubbles of your promises,
residues of your gifts,
pictures torn to pieces, 
my handwritten notes
a hundred poems, 
a thousand letters
and the ashes of our bodies.
I spread my wings 
and begin to rise
and look up for the clouds
The dark clouds that came
never left.
But I am.
•••

Author's Notes/Comments: 

A poem about moving on.

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allets's picture

Poem Of A Love

The images of the time spent together was quite fine - slc


 

 

j.d.wade's picture

i kind of sang it like a song

i kind of sang it like a song in my head. i imagined you with like this soft, sad voice and this pop song rhythm. i was enchanted.

ginsywilde's picture

I Would Like It To Be A Song

Really?! Thank you so much! I'm glad you liked it. I actually want my poems, especially this one, to become songs. Unfortunately, I don't know how to play any instruments so I could only settle for poems. Innocent

Phoenix_Rising's picture

I pretty much felt every

I pretty much felt every word.  Cherish the good times you had with the person,  but also move on.  Some things just isn't meant to be forever.  If the relationship was all bad, then look at it as a lesson learned. 


*~I may fall, but just like the Phoenix, I will rise from the ashes~*

ginsywilde's picture

Agreed.

Thank you! I agree with everything you said. This poem is all about me moving on from that relationship. Sometimes, you have to appreciated the highs but also not ignore the lows in order to fully understand what to do after it ends.

Phoenix_Rising's picture

That is exactly true. 

That is exactly true. 


*~I may fall, but just like the Phoenix, I will rise from the ashes~*

miss.understood's picture

This is absolutely beautiful!

This is absolutely beautiful! Great Job!


Accept me for who I am, or watch me as I go. 

ginsywilde's picture

Thank you so much! This means

Thank you so much! This means a lot to me. I really liked your poems too!

Morningglory's picture

Wow

Beautifully written. Reminds me of times in my own history. The sadness of being forced to let go because circumstance and confusion came between. My heart still tears over the recollection. Your piece sounds written by a particular friend of mine that I used to see/hear read live. Thanks for sharing! Nice to read you again.


Copyright © morningglory

ginsywilde's picture

Thank you for your comment!

Thank you for your comment! Time heals everything. What matters now is that we learn from our history. I hope I could meet you and your friend over coffee someday. It would be great!

Morningglory's picture

PP coffee party...

That would be fun, wouldn't it?


Copyright © morningglory

Morningglory's picture

Wow

Beautifully written. Reminds me of times in my own history. The sadness of being forced to let go because circumstance and confusion came between. My heart still tears over the recollection. Your piece sounds written by a particular friend of mine that I used to see/hear read live. Thanks for sharing! Nice to read you again.


Copyright © morningglory

word_man's picture

love can be painful at times

love can be painful at times

ginsywilde's picture

yes it is. but in time, we

yes it is. but in time, we all can be healed. thank you for reading! :)

DaddyO's picture

I like this

I like the rhythm as well as some of your rhyme choices. Strangely spiritual too. 

ginsywilde's picture

Thank you very much! I like

Thank you very much! I like your poems too. I hope I  hear from you soon!