Our nephew Rick and his wife Laura in a move we found quite sweet
for Deborah’s belated birthday…invited us out to eat.
“You have a choice to make.” Laura would assert
“We could take you to a restaurant for lunch and then to another for dessert.
“Or…”Knowing your affinity for sweets”.
(it’s true…sometimes we eat sweets until it hurts)
“We could skip lunch all together and just go for the desserts.”
Deborah did not hesitate…it’s as if my mind she read….
then smiling into her phone…”Oh, just desserts.” She said.
They took us to a restaurant named Sucré where we knew our sweet desire would be quenched…
because as we would soon be learning sucré means sugar…in French.
We were greeted with a cornucopia of sweets…
the moment we walked into the store….
beautiful pastries in shapes and colors we’ve never seen before.
After taking our order for 9 different pastries…
the woman behind the counter seemed nonplussed…..
when she asked how many more people would be joining our party and we said…
Why, it’s just the 4 of us.
We ate beautiful concoctions…made with things called yuzu curd, and strawberry glee
and with each bite we felt this need to enthusiastically applause
Did I mention the goat cheese carrot cake, the blueberry tart…or the hazelnut dacquoise?
One of our favorites was a Kouign-Amann…which in each of us caused a happy tear to drop…
It’s basically a croissant made with extra butter…and caramelized sugar on top.
Any time we get together with Rick and Laura…we laugh…we talk…we eat…
this particular time…the conversation was augmented by all that sucré in the sweets.
We feel blessed and loved anytime we see Rick and Laura
and this time…as we ate sweets until it hurt…
I realized this particular moment
was so much more than just dessert.
Ava’s mom, her dad, two of her brothers, a soon-to-be sister in law
her cousin with his girlfriend and Nana and I all came….
to watch Ava (her team’s goalie) play this season’s last soccer game.
In spite of a cool wind blowing and a sprinkling of rain
our excitement on the sideline could not be contained.
There were high expectations when the season had begun.
but, alas, Ava’s team this year lost more games than they won.
And though we’d love to see her team win every game along the way
as a family we are happy just watching Ava play.
Cheering her and her team on…feeling happy, proud, enthused.
Celebrating with her when they win while supporting her when they lose.
And our family is not the only family to share this point of view
If you happen to look along the sidelines you’ll find…it’s something families do.
Perhaps besides supporting Ava…in a way we’re reliving our youth…
remembering a time we miss…
and though that may be partially true…it is much more than this…
I think it’s because we know there will come a time (as it has for all of us before)
when Ava takes off those big goalie gloves and doesn’t play soccer any more.
When she looks back to her soccer games…to a day…perhaps just like today
she won’t remember how many games she won or lost
but she will remember who came to watch her play.
Basic addition teaches us that 2 + 2 are four…
and how each day we are one day older than we were the day before…
If you think that you are different…that it’s not happening to you…
a quick look in the mirror will prove how this is true.
But every now and then…defying the lessons we learned in school
time allows us a quick visit to the past as she disregards her rules.
Our family, like all families, through the years has grown…
with many of our family members now living on their own.
But when our family comes together…like this Christmas
(although it really doesn’t matter where or when)
In those moments we share together we all seem young again…
Yes, we’ve all grown a little older…some of us are more wrinkled
and our hairs’ a shade of grey…
but when our family gets together…it’s our inner children who come out to play.
We hug, we laugh, we eat pizza,
it’s a day filled with old traditions as a couple new surprises
we even play a silly game and and hand out cheap door prizes!.
And when I think I’m crazy….that this couldn’t be happening to me…
I look into the mirror…and there…a younger me I see.
I hope this Christmas everyone out there is as blessed and lucky as me
that you all feel a little younger…a little more innocent…and free…
And, for a moment, one brief moment, you get to experience life as it’s meant to be…
When time lets down her guard…and…2 + 2…are three.
MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAPPY HOLIDAYS
TodayI’m thankful once again for family
It’s changing shapes and sizes…big or small
the people who support us as we attempt to make our climb
and are there to catch us if we fall.
How does one define family?
I don’t think any one person can…
because all our families are different
have been…since families first began.
Because each family writes their now chapters
in a story that began long ago…
Because each family is unique
in the way they communicate…and grow.
Because each family writes their own music
discovers their own harmony…their own score…
a symphony of notes and melodies…
added to those that came before.
Because each family paints their own colors
each color plays a part
in blending with the other colors
in the painting of an unfinished work of art.
As you enjoy your family this Christmas
may you see them as a blessing…as a prize…
may you revel in their uniqueness…
whatever their shape or size.
Enjoy this chapter in your life
all the music and art you’re making.
May you always see your family
as beautiful and breathtaking.
May you find joy in every family member
in the way Fate has intertwined you…
and may you ignore the voices of anyone
who tries to redefine you.
I watched Ava’s soccer game the other day
and amidst the excitement…the applause…the cheers
I realized I’ve been watching our children and grandchildren play soccer…for over 40 years.
The rules of the game haven’t changed…
nor have the parents on the sideline who coach it
but what has changed as the children grow…is the way they all approach it.
When they are little…
”Kick it! Kick the ball!” You hear parents and coaches cry
while that child smiles…much more interested in a butterfly or a bird
as the ball goes rolling by.
“Run to the ball! Go get it!” Coaches and parents roar…
while that child is smiling and waving at a relative on the sideline…
they hadn’t noticed before.
The coaching from both sidelines over the years remains the same…
but it takes a while before the players on the field truly understand the game.
And, if they’re lucky, how soccer played from the time they’re young…
until they reach their teens…
can teach them a lot about life…and exactly what winning means.
The basic lesson is a simple one…in fact when we were kids it was the same:
How even though it feel good to win…it’s more important how you play the game.
If you had fun…if you played hard but fair…
If you had a chance to cheat…but you refused…
It doesn’t matter as much at the end of the game…if you win or lose.
How whether it’s a sport…or life…whatever you’re participating in…
you can learn as much or more about yourself when you lose
as you do when you win.
Ava broke a nail…her knee was dirty…she was a little bruised and battered….
but just as it has for the past 40 years…the final score…to me…didn’t matter..
I hugged Ava at the end of the game…I couldn’t help but grin
because…just getting to watch her play…for me…will always be a win…
I like to think of our family as a beautiful mixed bouquet….
flowers…sprouted from individual seeds…that grow a little every day.
Every flower is magnificent…unique in their own way…
and when combined with all the other flowers…add to the beauty of the bouquet.
And we find we cherish moments when the bouquet is in full bloom…
when every member of the family…in the same place…the same room.
For it is when all the flowers are assembled…say for birthday’s or holidays…
that we get to experience the beauty of the complete…the entire bouquet.
But we also like to take time every now and then even if it’s only for an hour…
to sit down with individual family members and experience the beauty of their flower.
Which is where you would have found us yesterday…at a restaurant…having fun
while eating tuna melts and French fries…with only one grandson.
We sat together talking, eating…laughing…for about an hour…
one Nana and one PopPop enjoying the beauty of one flower.
We hugged our grandson and smiled as we watched him drive away…
having been reminded how the beauty of one flower
adds to the overall beauty of our bouquet.
Today I’m thankful for our family tree
for contained within it leaves and branches
are the people in our life…who currently adore us…
and contained within its roots
are all our ancestors who came before us.
I was putting away some Fiesta Ware the other day when, noticing all the colors in front of me
I had to stop and smile at how they reminded me of our family tree.
I love our family tree…love every leaf…love its branches one and all…
love how it is painted all year long…in colors of the Fall.
I’m proud of the colors of our family tree…and as each new branch extends
how easily those colors synthesize…how beautifully they blend.
There is a kind of magic in how our colors come together to form this beautiful symmetry.
knowing underneath those colors lies the heart…the true magic of our family tree.
We share each others highs and lows…and we’ll go to extremes
to support each other’s hopes…to encourage each other’s dreams.
We find the more we do this…that our tree grows strong and tall…
and we find the colors of our tree…though beautiful, don’t matter to us at all.
I could probably end this poem here…but I think it only fair
to go back to where it started…with our Fiesta Ware.
I love the diversity of each plate…the different colors one and all…
love how our collection is permanently painted in colors of the Fall.
How food that’s made with love…always will taste great..
no matter which color bowl we choose…
no matter which color the plate.
That’s why Fiesta Ware reminds me of our family tree…
because whether its the Fiesta Ware stacked high on a kitchen shelf
or our family tree standing tall…
when love is holding them together…
their colors do not matter to us at all.