#alone #depression #sad #lonely #pain #tears #upset #secret #suicide #love #peace #miss #grief #time #lost #crazy #mad #gone #relationship

Silently Sobbing


Sobbing silently
Your had slipped away
I needed you now
Sadness grew
My heart is empty
Whit a perfect smile
A masked to the world
I close the door
Hoping it won’t leave a trace

The ghost of the past still dancing
Images that I cant let go
Of the happy times we shared
The hours we cared
Life went on
With you not there
I still needed you
My heart is empty
And sadness still there
Lost and alone
I silently weep
Of a love I lost
I just can’t bare
I need you here
Wiping my tears

Endless fall

I will be missed I hope.

Not knowing is what's keeping me from going.
Struggling with two sides of me.
For everyone, I'm sorry.
I do want to die but yet I don't.
I'm selfish both ways.
I'm crazy and I won't
Ripping anger and sadness dwells on me.
But happiness I can also see.
The world is grand.
And I am the cent.
All My insides full of torment.
Decreasingly funny and bold.
I guess after all it's to fold.

My Mind Needs To Die

Mental Illnesses

Waking up in the morning,

my head battels with itself.

I wonder if there is any escaping


Is there a way I could be eaten by my bed,

so I do not have to rise?

If I must rise,

may I die later on?

I cannot survive another minute.

Trudging on through the day,

my mind continues to battel itself.

It stands in place of my heart.

My dreams shattered by the importance

of my brain.

Could I just kill it off?

Maybe the voices would stop tugging my hair,

and picking at my skin

if my mind was dead.

No, I promise you

this is no suicide note.

I do not want to die.

I still have dreams to acomplish.

But my mind,

it needs to leave me alone.

None of what I hope for,

will be completed

if my mind stays alive.

Why can't it die,

without me?

Suicide after 10

Drip Drip Drip

The blood hits the ground.

my music is so sound I doubt anyone hears a sound.

Im so angry nobody came But i hear a voice so soft it sounds like rain.

I looked uop for a special someone one but all i ear is someone telling me im done it for fun i tell my friend but only i know its the end

everynight i cry aloud look at me mommy are you proud?

you laugh in my face and say im a disgrace youve made my world an awful place this disease od sadness is a bad case.

My knees hit the floor and i lift my helpless hand to the door. Im fine i tell myself but i was telling white lies couldnt you tell look at my dull eyes. This was a war between depression and I oh look its a tough tie dear lord why cant I just die?! whats more I feel someone push against the door, Im getting weak the blood falls again now my arms become streaked I looked at the clock it was only 10 there is that soft voice again it said follow me and the world should let me be

in came my mommy and in came my daddy its too late now im soul is ready.

(Hey guys I had to type this fast so I didnt have anytime for corrections so im truly sorry if you see any terible grammar errors.)

My Sacrifice

                                My Sacrifice


So maybe tonight i will end it all 

Ill slit my wrists and watch the blood fall

Ill tye a knot and follow the angels call

Ill take pills till it doesnt hurt at all

I will drown my sorrows as i fall under this peacefull slumber

I will take my life to finally put an end to all this pain and strife

Thats my sacrifice 

Thats my sacrifice


Author's Notes/Comments: 

No im not actually going.to kill myself writing this just helped.me.cope


The feelings are overwhelming

I feel wave after wave

Shards of glass piercing my skin

All at once, drowning in a sea of emotions

Lost at sea for an eternity

Don't try to help

All alone and nowhere to go

I nned you more than I say

Lost and confused

It grows darker by the minute

Eternal darkness

Author's Notes/Comments: 




I've lost my mirth,


so tempt me no further.


For foul demons, do loom 


in the present air. She


hath cursed me too many times,


and now I ask myself to be or not to be.


Nay, I'll progress, ere I find some end


that dost have happiness. 


Although for her troubles, I'll fain 


give my joys to her, so that she dost


live how I shall not.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Another Shakespear one, this one felt more like a conversation between myself when i was writing it. Tongue Out


Words come slipping from the quill
As the blood begins to spill
to slide and wiggle down my arm
to bring me somewhere safe from harm
to lead me to a place I know
a place where darkness lives and grows
Once I am there peace I will find
This hell of earth left far behind
Do we really know that dying is bad
Have we heard from those who have?
How do we know it is not bliss
Anything would be better than this
To crawl and scrape and live this way
why should I wish for one more day?
Why should I not wish all it gone
To wish to be free of all this wrong
Of all this pain and all this sorrow
Why should I wish to see tomorrow?
Why oh Why is this asked of me
Isnt the pain quite plain to see? 
Why should I rise and fight this day
To only see it torn away
Into a place of peace I now go
Or to the fires down below
But as I enter the abyss 
I only wonder if I'll be missed

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Have returned to the realm of self-harm for the first time in 5 years as my depression and recent insanity piles on the suicidal thoughts, this one reaches deeper than anyone who reads it can understand. 


Happiness in darkness fades
All the colors turn to grays
To take a look through my eyes
to see that I am mortified 
to see all that your wrath has wrought 
a mind trapped within its thoughts
to my cell you hold the key
for thoughts of you imprison me
A swift ending would suffice
To leave this prison of my device 
To feel no more, to leave this place
To no longer see your face
With each long torturous day 
I wish your memory away
And if you would look inside
A piece of you in me to find
Not to help or to heal
but to make my soul its meal
And when I am dead and gone
To see I knew it all along
Inside of me the thorn did hide
I found it easy to disguise 
To smile, wave, and to talk
While in the valley I did walk
A whole man I was no more
My better half dead long before...